153 Back to the Beginning

I slumped against the sealed door. My mind was a muddled mess, and I didn't know what to do anymore. I curled up, wrapping my arms around my knees, telling myself that I needed to calm down and think.

Maybe I should've expected this. I should've known there was a reason why Bai Ye tried so hard to keep Twin Stars' past a secret from me. There had been signs, from the fear in his eyes the first time I told him about those visions, to the grief in his voice when he recounted the story of the swords going berserk and told me that I had the right to judge him however harshly. I had expected the truth to be astonishing … but I hadn't expected it to be so devastating, and I hadn't expected it to be about me.

Why did he decide to tell me this now, in such a way, at such a time? Could he simply not bear to see my reaction if he told me in person? Or did he no longer care how I felt once he left for the retreat … because he had no more use for me after this?