12 Chapter Twelve

There was a big difference between knowing something in your gut and it being confirmed right in front of you. Carissa was currently face to face with that difference.

The compound shook as the ship had landed. The team all ran outside. The ship landed in front of them, Steve ran to meet Tony. Carissa wasn't far behind.

"Couldn't stop him." Tony said.

"Neither could I." Steve responded.

No Peter. Where was Peter? The girl's eyes watered as her hands shook. Her best friend wasn't returning from space.

She knew that. The familiar sound of Wanda's voice told her. Carissa missed Wanda. She missed them all. The little voice in her head now adopted her voice, which had been growing more and more faded as the days dragged on.

"Hang on." Tony said, stopping Steve. He looked straight into his eyes. "I lost the kid." He said.

Carissa felt nauseous. Her heart sank into her stomach as it twisted.

But she had already known that.

She had talked about the difference between feeling and knowing. Here it was. Thinking it was true didn't make her want to shrivel up and die like knowing did. That was all she wanted now. She wanted to curl up into a ball and fade away.

"Tony, we lost." Steve corrected him.

That's right. They had all lost to some degree or another. They were all torn apart inside from the events that had taken place.

"Is uh..." Right as Tony started, Pepper ran up. "Oh, good." He said at the sight of her.

"Oh, my God!" She exclaimed. She pulled him into a hug as she started crying. Carissa looked back at Natasha. She walked over, linking their arms before walking back into the compound. Riss was jealous. Tony got his happy ending with Pepper. Where was hers? This shit was rigged, the girl was sure of it.

"It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth." Rhodey announced.

"That's it?" The girl whispered. Her voice was at its max volume, she had been surprised it had even come.

"World governments are in pieces." Natasha added.

"Add me to that list." She mumbled.

Sam's picture flashed across the screen, followed by Wanda's. The girl flinched at the sight of both. When Peter's popped up, Tony met her eyes. The desperation in them mirrored hers. He had let his guard down, released a minimal amount of raw emotion. He looked down at the floor as she had turned back to the screen.

Nick Fury's image came up a few after Peter's.

"He took out Fury." She noted. Only other person she knew that could do that much damage was Bucky. Or, rather, The Winter Soldier. Her lump formed in her throat just thinking about her.

Natasha was still talking, but she didn't hear a word. She couldn't. Not until Tony started up. She'd always listened to Tony, no matter what was going on in that pretty little head of her's. Especially now as the two felt the same pain.

"Where is he now? Where?" Tony asked.

"We don't know." Steve replied.

"Can we find out?" Carissa asked. She still stared at the screen, her voice was soft and broken. Her hands shook as she wrapped her arms around her waist as if she were holding herself together.

"He just opened a portal and walked through." Steve continued.

"That's how he showed up and left." She added. "After taking everything away from us."

"What's wrong with him?" Tony asked, pointing at Thor.

Carissa leaned down to meet his ear. "Thanos killed Loki." She whispered.

"Oh, he's pissed." Rocket answered. "He thinks he failed. Which, of course, he did but there's a lot of that going around, ain't there?"

"Honestly, until this exact second I thought you were a Build-A-Bear." Tony said.

Any other day that would've had the blonde girl rolling on the floor. This wasn't a normal day. She was pretty sure she'd never have a normal day again. She was sure of it, but she didn't expect anything less. The Build-A-Bear raccoon was right. They failed. They all failed miserably.

"Maybe I am." Rocket replied.

"We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now." Steve said.

"With no turn-out." Carissa added. "Obviously."

"Deep space scans and satellites and like Carissa said, we got nothing. Tony, you fought him." Steve continued.

Tony looked over at him. "Who told you that? I didn't fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the Bleecker Street magician gave away the stone. That was what happened. There was no fight, because he's not beatable."

She started to hyperventilate. Iron Man couldn't fight him. Captain America couldn't fight him. Thor couldn't fight him. In her seventeen years of life, she'd never seen something they couldn't beat.

"Did he give you and clues, and coordinates, anything?" Steve asked.

"Uh...I saw this coming a few years back. I had a vision. I didn't wanna believe it. Thought I was dreaming." Tony answered.

"Tony, I'm gonna need you to focus." Steve said.

"He's been in space for weeks, dad. What the hell do you want from him?" She intervened.

"And I needed you." Tony replied. "As in, past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late, buddy. Sorry. You know what I need?" Tony began to stand. "I need a shave. And I believe I remember telling all youse..."

"Tony, Tony!" Rhodey tried as a Tony ripped the IV out.

"...alive and otherwise, that what we needed was a suit of armor around the world. Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not. That's what we needed." Tony continued.

"Well, that didn't work out, did it?" STeve asked.

"I said we'd lose. You said, 'We'll do that together, too'. And guess what, Cap? We lost. And you weren't there. But that's what we do, right? Our best work after the fact? We're the 'Avengers'. We're the Avengers, not the Pre-vengers'."

"Okay." Rhodey told Tony while holding him up.

"Right?" Tony asked.

"You made your point. Just sit down, okay?" Rhodey tried.

"Please." She pleaded. But he did. He made his point.

"Okay. No, no here's my point. You know what? She's great by the way." He said, pointing to the blonde Riss didn't recognize.

"Tony, you're sick. Sit down." Rhodey continued trying.

"We need you. You're new blood. Bunch of tired old mules. I got nothing for you, Cap. I got no coordinates, no clues, no strategies, no options. Zero. Zip. Nada. No trust, liar." Tony ripped the rector off. "Here, take this. You find him, you put that on, you hide. Your daughter hides." Then Tony went down.

"Tony!" Steve yelled.

"I'm fine." Tony said. "Let me..." Then he went down, out.

"Carissa." Natasha called. She looked up at Nat. She motioned for Riss to go over to her as they got Tony into the bed. No matter how old she was, Nat would always treat her like the child in the room. Most would hate it, she found it extremely comforting. Riss needed someone to pull her away from the bad shit every once in a while.

"Bruce gave him a sedative. He's probably gonna be out for the rest of the day." Rhodey told us.

Carol spoke next. "You guys take care of him and I'll bring him a Xorrian elixir when I come back."

"Where are you going?" Steve asked her.

"To kill Thanos." She replied.

"Hey." Nat called. "You know, we usually work as a team here and, uh, between you and I, morale's a little fragile."

"We realize up there is more your territory, but this is our fight, too." Steve added.

"You even know where he is?" Rhodey asked.

"I know people who might." Carol said.

Nebula walked in, joining the conversation. "Don't bother. I can tell you where Thanos is."

"And you're telling us now?" She asked.

Nebula told her story and told them about his retirement plan. He sat in the garden, pulling a smart ass comment out of Rhodey.

"That's cute. Thanos has a retirement plan." Rhodey commented. Tony couldn't be the smart ass in the room, and Riss didn't have the strength. Only fitting.

"So, where is he?" Steve asked.

"In the garden. Weren't you listening?" Riss sarcastically replied. Maybe she had the strength for one comment. You could never say she gave up.

"When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for a power surge of ridiculously cosmic proportions. No one's ever seen anything like it. Until two days ago, on this planet." Rocket pulled up a green planet.

"Thanos is there." Nebula said.

"He used the stones again." Natasha said.

"What are we waiting for?" She asked.

"Hey, hey, hey." Bruce started. "We'd be going in shorthanded; you know?"

"That's assuming he even fights back. He's alone." Riss said.

"We don't know that." Bruce replied.

"Look, he's still got the stones, so..." Rhodey stepped in.

"So, let's get them." Carol said.

"I agree with her." Carissa responded.

"Use them to bring everyone back." Carol finished.

"Just like that?" Bruce asked.

"Yeah. Just like that." Steve said.

She shook her head. "No. Nope. Sorry, doesn't work that way. It's gotta be more complicated."

"Even if there's a small chance that we can undo this...I mean, we owe it to everyone who's not in this room to try." Natasha said.

"If we do this, how do we know it's gonna end any differently than it did before?" Bruce asked.

"Because before you didn't have me." Carol responded.

"Hey, new girl?" Rhodey responded. "Everybody in this room is about that superhero life. And if you don't mind my asking, where the hell have you been all this time?"

"Space. Weren't you listening?" She replied to Rhodey.

"There are a lot of other planets in the universe." Carol replied. "And unfortunately, they didn't have you guys."

Thor stood up, gaining everyone's attention as he walks up to Carol. He lifted his hand, pulling his axe to him. It brushed right by her. Carol showed no reaction.

"I like this one." Thor said.

"Let's go get this son of a bitch." Steve said.

Riss clapped her hands together. This fucker was gonna pay. Roll title sequence.

They were suited up and on the ship. Riss had never been in space before but she soon found out she wasn't the only one. Cute.

When asked, Steve, Nat and Rhodey raises their hands along with the blonde.

"You better not throw up on my ship." Rocket said.

"I don't throw up." She reassured the raccoon.

"Approaching jump in three...two, one." Nebula counted down.

The flash of color they rushed through was mesmerizing. It only lasted a few seconds, but it was amazing. When she looked back, Steve was holding his compass. Riss hated that damn thing. She always had.

"This is gonna work, Steve." Natasha promised.

"I know it will." Steve replied.

"It's not this easy." The girl mumbled to herself. "Never fucking has been."

"'Cause I don't know what I'm gonna do if it doesn't." Steve admited to Nat.

"I'm more worried about what she might do." Nat replied.

Riss couldn't see them anymore, but she knew that was in reference to her.

Carol came back up to the ship. "No satellites. No ship. No armies. No ground defenses of any kind. It's just him."

She turned around to Bruce. "I told you."

"And that's enough." Nebula responded to Carol.

It's a pretty planet. Riss could see why he would retire here. Carol stormed in first, blasting him from afar, flying through the wall to his little shack.

Rhodey flew in next, holding his arm as Carol attempts to pull the gauntlet off. Thor burst in next, chopping his hand off.

He was groaning as Riss walked in behind her dad.

Rocket flipped the hand over to see that the stones were gone.

"I fucking knew it." Riss whispered.

"Where are they?" Steve asked.

"Answer the question." Carol demanded calmly.

"Where the fuck are they?" Riss barked less calmly.

"The universe required correction." Thanos said. "After that, the stones served no purpose, beyond temptation."

"You murdered trillions!" Bruce exclaimed. Riss was glad she wasn't the only one slightly hysterical.

"You should be grateful." Thanos replied.

"For what?" Riss snapped. "You killed my best friend. You killed my dad's best friend."

"Her boyfriend." Bruce added.

"More or less. Not the point." Riss replied.

"Where are the stones?" Nat asked.

"Gone." Thanos replied. "Reduced to atoms."

"You used them two days ago!" Bruce replied.

"I used the stones to destroy the stones." Thanos said.

"No." The girl whispered. "No, no, no."

"It nearly killed me." Thanos continued.

"Good." Riss replied.

"But the work is done. It always will be. I am inevitable."

"We have to tear this place apart. He had to be lying!" Rhodey said.

"My father is many things." Nebula said. "A liar is not one of them."

"Thank you, daughter. Perhaps I treated you too harshly."

And those were his last words as Thor swung his axe over his head, using it to behead Thanos.

"What?" Banner asked.

"What did you do?" Rocket asked.

"What we should've done three weeks ago." She answered.

"I went for the head." Thor replied. Riss watched as he walked out before turning to face Steve.

That was the last time she saw Thor.

The next five years went by really slowly. Tony had settled down, having a child. Sweet little Morgan. Although the blonde pair hadn't talked in two years, Riss knew her dad has his group meetings, Natasha has her little meetings with Carol, Rhodey, Rocket and others. Any amount of control they could have over their lives, they took.

Riss was twenty-one now, but still looked the same as she had five years ago. Because of the Super-Soldier serum in her body from Steve, she hadn't physically aged much and probably won't for a few more years. Her mom had been a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. She was the product of strength and smarts. She was also sneaky and quick, two things she'd gotten from my mom, Candace.

She climbs out of the driver's seat of her car, which was now sitting in the driveway of Stark's beautiful home. She'd traded out her old camper for a new 2007 dark grey beetle. Stark's cabin had a lake in the back and trees surrounding.

"Miss Morgan Stark?" She asks, walking into the yard. She could see Morgan's blue tent from the car.

Tony comes out right behind her. "Hey, Riss." He pulls the girl into a tight hug before walking along with her. He claps rhythmically. "Chow time." He calls.

He got to the tent, leaning down towards it. "Maguna." He calls. "Morgan H. Stark, want some lunch?" He asks.

Finally, the small girl emerges from the tent. "Define lunch or be disintegrated." She says, pointing a little blaster glove towards Tony while wearing Pepper's mask. Riss remembered Tony showing her while he was designing it.

"Okay." Tony replies. "You should not be wearing that, okay? That is part of a special anniversary gift that your Auntie Rissy was helping me with." He pulls the mask off of Morgan.

"There you go. You thinking about lunch?" He asks the small girl. She leans down to the small girl's level.

"I know I am." She says softly into her ear.

"I can give you a handful of crickets on a bed of lettuce."

"Tasty." She replies.

"No." Morgan responds to Tony.

"That's what you want. How did you find this?" He asks about the mask.

"Garage." Her adorable voice replies.

"Really?" He asks. "We're you looking for it?"

"No." She replies. "I found it, though."

"You like going in the garage, huh? So does daddy." He replies to her, picking her up. "It's fine, actually. Mom never wears anything I buy her."

Riss laughs at Tony's response and walks behind them.

"Hi, Auntie Rissy."

"Hi, sweetie." She replied to the small girl.

Riss hears a car door shut, pulling her attention away from Morgan. Steve stands in the driveway with Nat and Scott.

"What the hell?" Riss asks.

"Don't know." Tony says.

Ris follows him up to the porch. He and Nat nods at each other. He takes Morgan and put her inside before coming back out to the porch. Riss was glad he was quick, staring at them was awkward.

"Hey, dad." Riss greets.

"Carissa." He replied coldly.

Then Scott and Steve did a pitch for time travel.

"We know what it sounds like." Scott says.

"Tony, after everything you've seen, is anything really impossible?" Steve asks.

"But does it compare to time travel?" She asks.

"Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck scale which triggers the Deutsch Proposition. Can we agree on that? In layman's terms, it means you're not coming home." Tony says.

"But what if there was a way we could?" She asks.

"Which side are you on?" Tony asks.

"The side that gets Bucky and Peter back." She replies.

"I did." Scott says.

"No." Tony replies. "You accidentally survived."

"Then let's do that on purpose." Riss says.

"It's a billion-to-one cosmic fluke." Tony tells Riss.

"Meaning we have a chance." She counters.

"Barely. You're crazy." Tony says before turning back to Scott. "And now you wanna pull a... What do you call it?"

"A time heist?" Scott answers.

"Yeah, a time heist. Of course." Tony says, obviously amused. "Why didn't we think of this before? Oh, because it's laughable. Because it's a pipe dream." Tony replies.

"No, Tony. It's a chance." She says.

"You're being reckless." Tony tells her.

"The stones are in the past." Steve says. "We could go back; we could get them."

"We can snap our own fingers. We can bring everybody back." Nat says.

"Or screw it up worse than he already has, right?" Tony replies.

"I don't believe we would." Steve says.

"I don't know if we can." Riss tells Tony. She knew what he was referring to and she couldn't see that happening. They wouldn't let anything happen to the little girl. Carissa wouldn't.

"Gotta say it. Sometimes I miss that giddy optimism. Carissa didn't really get that trait. However, high hopes won't help if there's no logical, tangible way for me to safely execute said time heist. I believe the most likely outcome will be our collective demise." Tony says to Steve.

"Not if we strictly follow the rules of time travel." Scott says. "All right? It means no talking to our past selves, no betting on sporting events."

Tony puts his hand up. "I'm gonna stop you right there, Scott. Are you seriously telling me that your plan to save the universe is based on Back to the Future? Is it?"

"No." Scott replies.

"Good. You had me worried there. That's not how quantum physics works." Tony tells him.

"Tony." Nat says. "We have to take a stand."

"After what happened last time?" Riss asks.

"We did stand. And yet, here we are." Tony says.

"I got thrown into a tree. I broke three ribs and my nose, exhausted my powers and still lost. Tony got stabbed with his own tech and got hit with a whole fucking planet and still lost. Dad got his ass kicked and still got up, still lost." Riss argues.

"I know you got a lot on the line." Scott says. "You got a wife, a daughter. But I lost someone very important to me. A lotta people did. Right, Carissa? And now, now we have a chance to bring her back...to bring everyone back, and you're telling me that you won't even..."

"That's right, Scott. I won't even." Tony replies. "I can't."

Carissa's eyes never leave Scott. Her. He lost someone very important to him. The door opens and closes. Then Riss hears Morgan's voice.

"Mommy told me to come and save you." She told Tony.

"Good job. I'm saved." He tells her before looking back up at Scott. "I wish you were coming here to ask me something else. Anything else. I'm honestly happy to see you guys, and I'm sure Carissa is too, Cap. I just...Oh, look table's set for six."

Steve stops him. "Tony. I get it. And I'm happy for you. I really am. But this is a second chance."

"I got my second chance right here, Cap. Can't roll the dice on it, not like you're willing to do. You don't get it. Your second chance comes for dinner here twice a week, and hasn't spoken to you in two years." He sighs. "Look, if you don't talk shop, you can stay for lunch. Carissa, are you staying tonight?" Tony asks.

Steve looked over at her with sadness in his eyes. He missed his daughter, but didn't want to have to admit it. Everything Tony had said was true and Steve knew it. He'd gotten a second chance and a half with Riss and had wasted it. He wished he could turn back the clock to fix it.

"Uh, I'm gonna go with my dad, Tony. I'll see you next week." She answers. Tony hugs her before she follows the three of them off the porch.

"Well, he's scared." Nat tells Steve.

"Rightfully so." Riss replies.

"He's not wrong." Steve says. He was shocked when Riss said she'd tag along with them. There was a lot the blonde pair needed to talk about.

"Yeah, but, I mean, what are we gonna do?" Scott asks. "We need him. What, are we gonna stop?"

"No, I wanna do it right." Steve says. We're gonna need a really big brain."

"Bigger than his?" Scott asks.

"Bigger than his." Riss agrees.

Steve looks at her. "I've missed you." He finally admits out loud.

"But you didn't call." She replies before climbing into the car. She opted for leaving hers there. "And I'm sure you're only saying that because of what Tony said. Save it." She adds once she sat. She knew she was being harsh, maybe even unreasonable, but she didn't care.

They sat in the restaurant with Bruce. Smart Hulk. None of them knew anymore.

"Come on, I feel like I'm the only one eating here." He said to the four of them. "Try some of that. Have some eggs." He offers.

"Uh, no thanks, Bruce. I don't like eggs." Riss replies.

"I'm so confused." Scott says.

"They're just eggs, dude. Not that complicated." Riss jokingly replies. Natasha smiles at her.

"These are confusing times." Bruce replies

"Right, no, no. That's not what I meant." Scott says.

"Nah, I get it. I'm kidding!" Bruce says. "I know, it's crazy. I'm wearing shirts now."

"What size?" Riss asks. She was genuinely curious.

"Yeah." Scott says. "What? How? Why?"

"Five years ago, we got our asses beat. Except it was worse for me. I lost twice. First, Hulk lost, then Banner lost and then, we all lost."

Worse for you? Debatable. Try me. Carissa thought.

"No one blamed you, Bruce." Nat says. Her face contorted in confusion. It was my fault. She thought. Riss fought the urge to roll her eyes. Every one of them thought that.

"Nobody blames you, either, Natasha." Rissa says out loud. Nat sends her a look.

Get out of my head. She tells the blonde. The blonde shrugged in response. She didn't like using that power, but sometimes she couldn't avoid it. Their thoughts were loud.

"I did. For years, I've been treating the Hulk like he's some kind of disease... something to get rid of. But then, I started looking at him as the cure. Eighteen months in the gamma lab. I put the brains and the brawn together and now, look at me. Best of both worlds." Bruce tells Nat.

Kids start walking up to Bruce, asking for a picture. After an awkward few minutes of Scott asking if they wanted one, the group went back to the serious topics.

"It's okay, Scott. We can take a picture later." Riss promises him.

"I feel like that'll be more of me getting one with you than you getting one with me." He replies.

"Yeah. It will be." Riss confirms.

"About what we were saying." Steve tries to get back on topic.

"Right. The whole time travel do-over?" Bruce asks. "Eh, guys, it's out of my area of expertise."

"Well, you pulled this off." Nat says. "I remember a time when that seemed pretty impossible, too."

Bruce looks from Nat over to Riss. She nods in agreement.

They left, walking back out to the car and driving back to the compound. It felt weird to be in the compound, considering the fact she'd been avoiding it for two years. Tony had successfully avoided the place like the plague.

"Can we talk?" Steve asked, walking into her old compound room.

"Sure, why not." She replies. He walks in, sitting on her bed.

"I haven't seen or heard from you in.."

"Two years, dad. Two years." She finishes for him. He knew that. Tony had said it.

"Why?" Steve asks her.

"Why didn't you call me?" She asks, flipping the subject around.

"I figured you wanted space after..."

"After that nasty fight we had?" She asks. Steve nods.

"I see you and Tony maintained your relationship." Steve says.

"I go over there once a week, dad. Sometimes more. I have my own room there and everything." She tells him. A few months ago, I lived there. But you wouldn't know that."

Steve sighs. "Can we be okay again? I need my daughter's help."

"You need my help or you need me?" She asks. "I could pull a Tony and tell you about how I needed you, but I won't." She was being harsh. A little too hard on him.

"I need you." He replies. He deserved her sharp words and cold tone. He kept his voice neutral. "We both lost someone very important to us. Just so happens to be the same person."

"So now you want to admit that we're both hurting?" She asks. She fought against the urge to sift through his head. She didn't want to go digging for how he really felt, she wanted him to express it. It bugged her that he'd always shut her out, but she never exactly invite him in.

He nods. "It was unfair of me to tell you your feelings." He knew she was hurting. He knew that she was hurting the most, considering how she could feel everyone's feelings and hear everyone's thoughts. He'd forgotten at the time, not realizing the weight her powers put on her. He remembered when he'd found out for herself.

She'd been upset after coming home with Tony, yelling and throwing her hands up. The pictures on their walls went flying up before falling. She stopped, closing her eyes. She waited for Steve to start yelling, but he didn't. He just walked away from her to call Tony. Tony had answered quickly, Steve straight away screaming at Tony.

Tony told him to think about why she'd done it. She'd felt nothing but this unbearable pressure from just her own name. She had big shoes to fill. Tony was more pissed at Steve for that than Steve could ever be at him. The two hung up quickly, not speaking again until they had to.

"I shouldn't have been so insensitive. He was your best friend." She tells him. It was true, he was her dad's best friend. She never once took his feelings about that into consideration, despite them being intermixed with her own. She hadn't realized the toll the powers took on her, making her feel any emotion double that of average.

"I don't know how I feel about you and Bucky." He admits. She knew this, but she didn't really care. She didn't want to receive the same lecture all over again.

"I'm not asking, dad. Bucky isn't either." She replies.

"I know." He says. "I guess I don't have a say. You're grown now." He stands, making his way to the door. He wanted her to be happy, even if Bucky was too old for her. Steve thought about how much the ice would make his aging slow, meaning Bucky was younger than Steve now. Steve wasn't sure how he felt about that.

"I love you, dad." She blurts out. It was something they didn't say much. They just didn't, it wasn't their relationship.

"I love you, too, Rissa. Get some sleep."

He walks out of the room. She looks up at her wall, seeing the board she had put up the night they moved into the compound. It had been a few months after the snapping. The board was full of pictures of Riss and Peter from years ago. She had cried while putting it up, pausing every once in a while to catch her breath. It's been seven years since the fight in Germany, where she'd met Bucky, not the Winter Soldier, and reconnected with Peter. It was odd to say that much time had passed. It felt like it was yesterday when she'd fallen from the shoulder of Scott Lang, landing her in a prison cell.

Down on the bottom right corner sat one picture that was different from the rest. A picture of Riss and Bucky, taken by Steve, in Wakanda. Her eyes lit up as she smiled up at him. It was after she had jumped from the impact of the barrier being hit. His hand still rested on her waist. She didn't know a picture had even been taken, let alone by her dad. She frowns at the picture now.

What was once a happy memory faded to dust.

word count: 4965

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