6 Bittersweet <6>

I walked up behind her, wrapping my arms around her shoulders, resting my cheek on her head.

''You're very beautiful. We all have our flaws. When you saved me, I… dreamt about you.''

''Did you have nightmares about me? Or wild fantasies?''

''Both. You killed me in one of them.''

''Telling a woman you dreamt about her is extremely creepy, you know?''

''S-Sorry…''

She grabbed my arm and squeezed it, as if to stop me from leaving. ''I don't know if you're brave, stupid, or both.''

''A-ahaha. Come to think of it, this was pretty stupid, right? Me coming here, I mean,'' I told her jokingly, trying to ease the mood.

''Yes, but,'' she whispered, ''I'm glad.''

My heart sped up when she said that, and she noticed, giggling a little. ''My name is Dahlia. Nice to meet you.''

And that's how I fell in love for the first time - irrational, innocent love with a murderer.

In the end, I went home after talking to her for a while more and finishing the stew. I went through what happened in my head on the way back, the bronze rays of the setting sun lighting my path, a gentle breeze forming. She told me to come see her again some time…

But what if I came off as too pushy if I came back too quickly? I thought.

I arrived back at the orphanage late, albeit with a massive grin on my face, which pleased the Matron. I met Miyabi in the field behind the orphanage, where she was picking flowers.

''Did something good happen?'' she asked when she saw my face.

''Ahaha, it's that obvious, huh?''

''Nishio, you do realize you're grinning from ear to ear, right? Sheesh… Spill the beans already!''

''Sorry, no can do. It's a secret!'' I jested, scratching my head. Miyabi looked displeased but didn't get a chance to press the matter further, as the Matron called us in for dinner.

I wasn't hungry, so I just sat down at the dinner table and watched everyone else eat - Nao, Miyabi, Takao and Futaba. We were all like a small family, with the Matron acting as our mother.

''Nishio, you're 15 already, right?'' the Matron asked, knowing well the answer to that question. I already knew what was coming next.

''Isn't it about time you found someone special to you?''

I fidgeted in my seat. ''Well… I… I might have someone like that.''

The whole table suddenly went silent.

''Huh? Did I say something strange?'' I said, looking around. Everyone was staring at me in shock, even the Matron.

They all erupted in a wave of screams, while the Matron simply shook her head and smiled. ''All grown up already, huh?''

''Ah, that reminds me,'' I exclaimed, looking at the Matron. ''Would it be possible for me to get a job in the village?''

''Huh? Well, it could be arranged… But why do you suddenly want money, Nishio?''

I scratched my head. ''Well… I want to buy a gift for someone.''

At this point, Miyabi got up from the table and stomped her way up the stairs. I asked the Matron if I did something wrong, but she simply responded with, ''Don't worry about it.'' and told me that she'd help me out with getting a job.

I wanted to become a man for Dahlia as soon as possible.

Fast forward two weeks, and I've received my first paycheck - a job in the village grocery store. I was worried… what if Dahlia already left? It's been two weeks after all. When I arrived back at the orphanage that day, I decided to ask the Matron for help. I had no idea what a woman would want, with the exception of jewelry.

The Matron had a silly grin on her face when I asked her the question, most likely flushed from ear to ear.

''Sit down and we'll talk, Nishio.''

And so, we talked. I told her, in scarce detail, what the woman I was interested in was like. However, our conversation was quickly interrupted by Miyabi, who, for some reason, had tears in her eyes. I immediately stood up from the chair and reached out towards her, but she simply ran up the stairs, hiding in the room.

I stood there with my hand in the air for a while, dumbfounded. What have I done wrong, I wondered. The Matron shook her head at me when she saw the expression on my face.

In the end, I paid a visit to the jewelry store in the village and picked out a pair of beautiful earrings, with black, glass tulips hanging off of them. It was expensive, costing me my entire first paycheck, but it didn't matter to me. I was simply a young boy trying to please my first love.