1 Chapter I: A Blue Body with a Journal

At 22:19, May the 18th; A girl by the name of Lily Martins committed suicide

Everyone went to her funeral, as she was the renowned school sweetheart from what everyone could tell. The perfect and prim student that everyone has fallen for once in their life. The perfect student as everyone called it. She was the star of the show, her signature flowy white beige dress she wears every time she went to school

Her smile was the sun, so was her hair as it looked like gold threads. Her skin was a milky white, with her hands dainty. She was graceful, never once looking like a klutzy or weird girl. She was the definition of perfection and she had everything

Supporting parents, people who help her along the way, a social circle, everything.

I guess we didn't expect her to hang herself with a noose at 10 P.M

Or i guess, i didn't expect to be roped in this mess either

It was the 2 days after her funeral, as time went on everyone started to try and cope it. My mother included as she was close friends with Lily's parents. So naturally i went to her house often, which included encounters in both parties

She wasn't truly the same as she looked out there, more specifically at society. She was clumsy, she could be selfish as well. She wasn't picture perfect in my books, she wasn't this Goddess who came from the heavens like everyone made her out to be but-

She was also human, but i guess everyone forgot about that part.

She had flaws, but i guess everyone forgot about that also.

She told that to me once, but i never really thought about it.

But i couldn't blame her for what shes done, because of the image she has painted made her like this. But back to the events, i was at her house for the after funeral when her mother pulled me aside.

"Eliene can you come here for a moment to the upstairs, please?" Her mother said, her voice laced with the sadness that have been for the past 2 days, she didn't plan to do this after funeral session, but she needed a formal closure, so does her friends and relatives

"Uhm, Ms. Martins..? Why do i have to go upstairs?" She stood quiet as she was dragged upstairs into Lily's room, the atmosphere growing more tense in this very room. 'This is where she died' is whats resonating behind my mind as i saw Ms. Martins open a small box, that had a journal in it.

I stood there, hands clamped together as i felt sweat drip down my body. My eyes on the book Ms. Martins was holding as she walked over to me. Her eyes clearly looking damp from the crying she has done.

"She..wanted to give this to you, Elaine" I stood there, hands still clamped and your eyes darting everywhere except from the woman in front of you. I didn't move, moreover i couldn't from the stare she was giving

Pity, sadness, and most of all, pain

'the loss of a child is the most horrible pain that a parent could face' I remember that statement somehow, maybe from a book.

My body was shaking all over, its as if i wanted to fall down and just stay there for a moment from the atmosphere growing more tense, as you could feel her mother sob and cry. I slowly lifted and opened my hands, as she weakly gave it to me. A faint thank you was heard from her, with that she left me with this book, a journal by the looks of it with flower imprints on the cover, those flowers were lilies, dainty white lilies. 'How..ironic' i thought as i went to sit down on her bed. As i looked around to see cardboard boxes lying around filled with her stuff. Indicating that it was going to be an empty room once they finish packing.

I sighed, knowing that this is the last time i'll ever see her room like this. Even if its half done. I caressed the journal on my hand, reminding myself that this is a journal that was owned by THE Lily Martins, that has suffocated to death due to hanging herself.

I took a deep breath, and with shaky hands i slowly turned the cover to the first page. My heart skipped a beat and my head started to whirl as i saw the first words written on this cover.

'This book belongs to Lily Martins, and will be given to you Eilene Pariese'

I stopped, my eyes not believing what is said in the cover of this journal as i went on to reading the message under the header.

'When you read this, it means i am completely and understandably dead. Since i have no reason to be giving this to you when i am still alive. This is a book filled with my thoughts and the experiences I've had over the past couple of years. As i have meticulously planned out my death with the reasons that you will uncover in the contents

For context, i wrote this before i decided to hang myself. So even if you were to travel back to the past you can't stop me from doing the deed. And yeah that's it

P.S: To say why i will give this to you, well its because you seem to be a trustworthy person to be given this. Also the fact that you are probably the only person that i hope doesn't see me as a goddess of some sort.

Also, don't show this to anyone.'

I sat there, looking at the words she wrote before she decided to kill herself, 'so these are her last words..' i thought as i sat still on the bed, the journal closed so i don't have to see this unbelievable revelations

'She planned this? Her death? How long? Meticulously? Why me? Why didn't i ask her mom? Why-' these thoughts kept running through my head as i felt myself crash onto Lily's bed, as i felt chills going down my spine as i looked up at the gray ceiling

"What the hell..?" I felt myself mutter as hear knocks on the doorway, as i sat up i see Hana looking at me, her slanted eyes concentrated on me as she walked over to me. As i looked at the way she walked around the room, her eyes lingering on the boxes as she went over those.

"Can't believe she died.." i heard her grumble under her breath as she turned to look at me. "So, what are you doing here?" She said, her voice a little shaky from seeing the packed things

"I was just..y'know laying here with no reason..?" I said, my voice a little wavering as i see her face turn into a face of confusion. "You say it like as if its a question.." Hana said, as she turned to the window without a curtain, as it was also packed in the box

"They really want no trace of her left huh.." Hana said, her voice heavy with sadness as she kept her eyes on the scene outisde, where cars and people wearing black colored attire, her cheek pressed against the cold window.

"You could..y'know take some stuff as a memorial." I said nonchalantly, "After all, you are her best friend" Hana then slowly turned around, her eyes were bright as she looked towards the noose that

"Yeah..i might have to ask for permission if i wanted to even try and get it to be in my house" Hana let out a little chuckle, as she walked to the doorway meaning that she wants to leave, her eyes filled with tears from her damp, brown eyes.

"Do you know the saddest part of all of this?" My ears perked up from this, as my body stiffened to hear the words she said out loud

"Is the fact that i didn't get to hear her last words" Hana said, before she hurriedly left with a sob following her back. I sighed, knowing that she doesn't even know that the last words are in this journal. I put my body back into the soft bed, as i feel pressure on my head with some tears threatening to fall down my cheeks.

My heartbeat was racing as i think about the mad consequences of the what if's running through my head as i slowly drift into a dreamlike state. Where my body couldn't move as i feel my body burning

And a blue body in front of me, hanging.

I screamed, but no sound came out as i see the body bloom lilies, white and black lilies as i scream more and more or try to move. But i couldn't, with the burning intensity on my body, i see the lilies wilt.

And the blue body turning into a corpse

I jolted up, my heavy breathing and the sweat beads making the pressure even worse on me as i feel my body collapsing. 'Get a hold of yourself Eileen' I say to myself as i tried to calm down from the imagery i saw in my supposed sleep

"Lene? What are you doing here?" I heard my mom ask, as i hurriedly fixed the black dress i was wearing as i hurriedly went up to my mom. "Uh, nothing. I was just looking around y'know?"

She then eyed me with the sweat on my face. and sighed

"Alright, lets go home then.."

"Alright, just let me check some things before we go" I then secretly took the journal that i somehow forgot and left on the bed, hurriedly hiding it behind my back as i went downstairs to go back home, questions burning in my head.