4 I attacked a bunch of buff Lapu-lapu genins.

Here I was, standing in front of five guys whom, with my stupidity, sneaked up my back without me knowing, well, duh, they sneaked up so of course, I don't know, ugh, you get the point. It's just, who the hell puts a mirror the size of an NBA basketball player and I was like 'Gee, I wonder…' and there, I was ambushed by these teenagers like they are from some kind of an ancient tribe made by College jocks and fraternities with a modern Lapu Lapu costume contest, and with that thought, I started regaining my composure and my confidence so that I don't look unintimidating.

I straightened my body and pat off all the dirt and dust on my inverted shirt to show formality to this rookies, I have fought an army, well, more than half until the Anakdatu came and now, I am a fugitive and most wanted to them. But well, I still can manage a group this many.

I offered my arm to buzz cut hair "Well, I am-"

But he spat on my arm, yes, pure saliva with the remnants of phlegm, ew. I stared at it and I transferred the saliva to the spear shaft of the buzz cut kid which looked at me murderously.

The buzz cut kid pointed the spear to my face now "What the hell? Are you messing with me? What's your problem? I just recently bought this spear and it is imported!"

And then I looked at the spear, well, it seems kinda new with a very nice wood shaft and a very clean spear point, better than what the other guys are holding.

I realized it's already night time and my mission suddenly flashed over me, I forgot I need to get to Elise but I need to deal with this guys first, let's mess with them. (insert evil laugh.)

"I am Batman," with the perfect impersonation of the hero's raspy voice "what's the deal with the new spear? Did you get that from Amazon? Ebay? Lazada? Shopee? Shopee's got this 11.11 sale, on November you know?"

Buzzcut kid now just got angrier and his friends are snorting from my awesome comment, but he just shrugged "Huh, well Batman is messing with us, eh? You know Batman, we just want to interrogate you for why are you in this place at this time, but," he shrugged, "you leave us no choice."

"Is there like some kind of curfew something in these woods? I didn't read a sign while I was on my way." I asked stupidly.

Buzzcut kid smiled coldly at me "Just stand down and you will experience less pain as ever."

I raised my umbrella "Well, I eat pain for breakfast, what do you've got, buzz cut?"

Buzzcut gritted his teeth. While he is contemplating from his anger, I made up a plan, destroy them all and run westward again so that they cannot catch me. I looked behind me so that I can choose a direction of my very sweet escape but there is this very huge Balete tree behind the mirror which gave me chills.

Balete trees are known to be home for the weird spirits in the stories of old; I won't press my luck if those stories are real too, but still, I need to go past the Balete tree, ugh, I hate hard decisions but there is no other choice.

I have been through so many situations like this so I know what is going to happen, buzz cut kid made the first move, he tried to poke me into my chest but I sidestepped, activated my Kampilan on which I missed so much for it has been a very long time since I used this very awesome weapon of mass destruction, they seemed to look surprised on the sight of my sword but I grabbed the shaft of buzz cut's spear and split it into two with one chop of my sword.

"Noooo!" buzz cut wailed as he knelt and held the other part of his spear, unexpectedly, he sobbed.

But after seconds of watching a huge guy cry, he stood up quickly and tried to grab my shirt in which his 4 comrades tried to make attacks on me, but well, it turned quite messy.

Buzzcut tried charging me but I sidestepped again and this time, I tripped him and he fell face first to the ground because of his momentum,. The four friends of buzz cut surrounded me, all their spear points at me but I've got no choice. I remembered Elise and she needs me right now and I have gone berserk.

Of course I didn't kill them, they are still humans, or looks like one, I parried one spear after the other, I seem to know what their next move is, like I feel it coming, almost like I have Spidersense and there I was cutting every spear in half, and disposing them. Buzzcut tried to stand but I pushed him back with my feet and I am just whirling and whirling, attacking everything on sight but of course, I am just hitting them with the flat of my blade or my hilt, just stun and immobilize them.

While I was whirling my sword, I saw that they are calling more and more reinforcements and then there were 10 soldiers who came now carrying swords instead of spears and I just pushed to my greatest limit, my very maximum effort, some of them hit me and gave me cuts but not any of them are deep enough to give any major injuries so I just wreak havoc to them, I need to find Elise.

Just then, I realized that everyone is already down and crutching their injuries, but of course, no blood because I promised not to kill anyone but just immobilize and stun them, killing is bad, my dear readers, so take my word for it.

I was breathing hard from the cardiovascular exercise given to me by that sword swinging but yeah, it feels great to be back at swinging swords.

Buzzcut groaned but he tried looking up at me "Who the hell are you?"

I was wanting to try another Batman impersonation but I was breathing hard, I was panting and trying to catch my breath so I just tried saying it normally "I told you, I'm-"

I was cut short when something on the back of my neck flared with pain, but not that much pain, it's like a syringe sinking on my neck, injecting fluids into my neck and suddenly, I feel dizzy and the world is spinning. I removed the thing that is embedded on my nape and took a look at it which looked like a dart with oozing black liquid on its point but this dart t point was decorated by colorful feathers, not that stealthy but touché.

Tranquillizer, why didn't I scanned first with Eve from the treetops? I tried looking behind me and on the top of the Balete tree and I saw someone on a Ghillie suit (yeah, I play Rules of Survival, better than PUBG, I tell you.) just perching on the tree holding a flute by his mouth, no, it isn't a flute, it's a blowgun, I didn't know those things still existed, awesome, but of course, I am already on the verge of collapsing and there I was falling to the ground with the fallen men, but what can I do? I was already tranquilized. Until the world went black.

***

While I was drifting on my unconsciousness, I don't know but I felt like I was somewhere weird. I opened my eyes and all I saw was, uh, the outer space. Weird but yeah, I was floating aimlessly which reminds me of Adventure Time, you know, when you are unconscious and you open your eyes and see that you are in outer space then the huge Cosmic Owl flies near you and say 'You are a big nerd.'. Yeah, I am a big nerd, but that is what it mostly looks like, minus the cosmic owl. And in this outer space, there are weird ghastly whispers everywhere but I can't understand them.

I looked below me and I saw the Earth, that blue dot where we live containing 7 billion people and counting. It's awesome, it's everyone's dream to see the Earth from far away, especially from outer space, I can stay here forever you know. I saw the Moon beside the blue dot, the yellow-orange sun from far away, it's just totally awesome.

Suddenly, something went wrong and I don't know what happened but a cold wind blew through me and weirdly, the sun started turning black like ash making everything dark and the stars are starting to get fewer and fewer making the outer space just pure darkness and the Earth, oh the Earth was turning black too until everything turned dark.

The scene now turns brightly, and it seems like I am drifting slowly to that source of light which made everything bright and suddenly, I was on a new scene, not that weird Cosmic owl scene, now, I am in a place which seems familiar to me, but I can't place the name where it really is. The scene is in a field, a huge field with grass in it (duh), it seems like a part of a forest but that doesn't matter, what matters is in this field, there is hell a lot of something, and that something is hard to describe. Pardon me but of course, I will provide my descriptions.

What I see is a crowd, no, an army of a collection of the weird splinter cells I fought last few months (long story), and other weird people or weird creatures that I cannot recognize that surely will give you chills and goosebumps because really, this is scary, imagine combing all Filipino horror story creatures in one scene, or the scariest things you can't imagine, it's just so hard to describe but hell it is scary. And their weird chattering and other sounds made the scene quite noisy.

I remembered the fields now, it's here in Batangas City, one of the spots where I tried looking for Elise but with no luck, I didn't find her. But what the hell are they doing here?

The weird combination of monsters and creatures whatever seems to be facing in one direction, like they have a leader or something, so then I followed their gaze and I saw a face that put a knot on my gut, the face of my ex-best friend, John Delmundo.

But this time, John seems different, he looks paler than I last saw him, and there are weird green veins near his eyes, like uh, Neji and Hinata's Byakugan, not the eyes but the area around his eyes has that weird veins and it's green, also his hair got longer and his eyes, his eyes now looks like he's got a Sharingan, it's completely red and black. He is wearing a weird ultra black Assassin's creed like outfit, like a huge kind of hoodie and white pants but his arms and legs are covered with dark armor. He seems to be shouting orders to the army but the noise drowned his voice. (Lots and lots of references, the cosmic owl says I'm a big nerd.)

After moments watching John trying his best to calm his army down, there was a man, oh no, the man I saw on my dreams before, Scrawny Santa, who just appeared from a plume of smoke and shadow. He still looks like Scrawny Santa, white curly-straight hair and beard, with his eyes completely white and he is wearing a pure black tuxedo. On his right hand is a bronze staff about 4 feet long which radiates coldness and other goose bumpy things.

Scrawny Santa pounded his staff into the ground and a wave of darkness rippled from his staff which made the monster army silent.

Scrawny Santa nodded to John. "Thank you, father." John spoke to Scrawny Santa, no way, that's his dad? Oh, I see the resemblance, they both reek darkness.

"Everybody listen! We will attack the camp of those pesky godlings and then the kings to finally obliterate them, " John yelled but the scene is turning fuzzy and John's voice turning softer until I cannot hear them and see them, no, please put the show back! Please show me that vision again! Nooooo!

But then I opened my eyes and I was awake, as in awake, not anymore a dream, I guess. I was in a dark room, and a light above me, like the stereotypical interrogation room. I looked down and I was on a chair, my hands are tied at my back and my things are also missing. Where was I?

There is a sound of footsteps approaching at me from the shadows and then I saw his face (I'm a believer, stop it, Smash Mouth reference), buzzcut kid is grinning "Good morning sunshine, how was your sleep last night?" and he started laughing like an evil villain. (Crazy guy.)