8 8: Mother Didn’t Want Me to Know

On the second ring, my dad answers with a smile in his voice, "Hey, monkey. How's my best daughter?"

I hear my mother yell at my father in the background, "Don't call her that! I hate when you call her that!"

My dad doesn't respond to my mother. That's the best way to deal with her most of the time, don't say anything. She really doesn't want a response most of the time anyway. And normally, I would respond to my dad's greeting with, "I'm your only daughter, and only child." But my tone is serious as I say, "Dad, I need to ask you something."

"Is something wrong, Eli," the concern in my father's deep bass voice is clear, "Are you alright? You sound upset. Are you in trouble?"

"I just need to ask you something, alright," I say firmly.

"Alright, Eleanor, ask away," responds my father in a worried tone.

"Am I adopted?"

My father is absolutely silent for a full minute. "Dad? ..."

"Eleanor, I think you should come home so we can discuss this," he says in his lawyer tone.

I hate when he gives me lawyer tone. "What's to discuss? It's a yes or no question, Dad. So, yes or no, am... I… adopted?"

He's silent for another moment before he answers in a sad tone, "Yes."

Now I'm silent for a moment as I absorb his answer. I finally say, a bit angry, "Dad, I'm twenty-six years old. When were you going to tell me?"

"Your mother didn't ever want you to know," my dad answers.

I take a deep breath and blow it out. "Okay, I'm adopted. But you're always saying how I look like Mom's mom. I always knew I didn't take after your side of the family. I just knew I took after Mom's family, but that's a lie?"

"You do take after your mother's family, Eleanor," my dad tells me. "You do take after your grandmother."

"If I'm adopted, how is that possible," I ask.

"Because you are related to your mother," my dad informs me.

"I am," I say surprised. "How? Mom never talks about her family and they live on the other side of the country."

"Your grandmother on your mother's side is your biological grandmother and your mother is actually your biological aunt," my dad informs me. "I'm so glad tonight is your mother's bridge night with her friends and she was on her way out when you called. If she were here right now, she'ld be having a conniption fit"

"So... if mom is biologically my aunt," me managing to think even though my brain feels like jello, "that means mom has a sister who's my biological mother. She's never talked about a sister. What happened? Did she die giving birth to me?"

"No," my father answers, "Luann is alive and well. Your mother just didn't ever want you to know."

"My biological mother is my mother's sister, Luann," me doing my best to absorb and process the information. "And she's human, which means I'm human. So, I'm not a chimp, right?"

Again my father is silent for a couple of moments before he says, "Eleanor, you really should come home so we can discuss this. I'll prepare your mother as best I can, but we really should discuss this as a family."

"Dad, it's another yes or no question," I am so not enjoying this conversation. But I know if I was talking with my mother, she would lie to me. "...So, is mom not human? Is mom and her side of the family chimps?"

"No, no," my father answers, "your mother and her family are all human."

"Okay, so we've got that straight," I'm doing my best to make sense of everything, "So, I'm human and not a chimp, right?"

"Yes and no," my father answers.

"What," I ask my father confused, "How can the answer be yes and no?"

"Your biological father is a chimp," my dad informs me.

"That's impossible," I respond, "Humans and chimps can't breed together."

"Yes, Eleanor, they can," my father informs me. "It's just not common knowledge humans, advance chimps and advanced gorillas can all interbreed successfully."

"I could get pregnant by a gorilla," I exclaim shocked.

"Yes, you can," my father responds. "Are you dating a gorilla?"

"Am I what? ... No, dad, no, I'm confused enough as it is. Don't make it worse... So, my biological mother is my mother's sister, Luann, and my biological father is a chimp. Is that why she didn't want me? Was she raped? Is that why she didn't want me?"

"Oh, Eleanor, no, it's nothing like that," my father says lovingly, "Luann and Tin are a loving couple. They love you and want you very much. We really need to discuss this as a family. Honey, you are so loved. But your mother didn't ever want you to know you were adopted. She didn't want you to know you're half chimp. Tin was a slave when you were born. Life could have been very hard for you"

"So, they gave me up to you and Mom to give me a better life," which sounds like a very hard thing to do to me, a pure act of selfless love.

Except my father says, "Not exactly."

"What do you mean not exactly," I ask.

"Honey, your mother can't have children and it's a long story. I don't want your mother to come back early and catch us talking about this. I know you're busy with your research for your master's thesis, but come home as soon as you can so we can discuss everything in detail. I'll do my best to prepare your mother. All I can promise you on that is that she won't be happy."

As if she's ever happy, "Yeah, we need to get to bed. Xan may be needed at the construction site tomorrow," I share absently.

"Xan," my father questions.

"Yeah, Xan," I look at Xanthus, "He's my... boyfriend?"

"I'm your man and you're my woman," Xan corrects me with a smile.

"He's my man and I'm his woman," I tell my father.

"I see," says my father in a way only a father can say, "Will we meet this Xan anytime soon?"

"Actually, you've already met him," I inform my father, "but it was a long time ago."

"Did I like him," ask my father.

"Yeah, you seemed to like him okay," I answer with a smile.

"Well, I look forward to meeting him again," my dad says sincerely.

"He's a chimp. Is that a problem," I ask.

"No, not for me, sweetheart," answers my father. "If he makes you happy, that's good enough for me. But I'm not going to be the one to tell your mother he's a chimp. As for your adoption, I never thought it should have been a secret and I hope you won't hold it against me. I love your mother, dearly, and do my best to make and keep her happy."

"I know, Daddy. You have a good-night."

"I love you, Eli," my dad says sincerely.

"I love you too, Daddy."

"Good-night, Eli."

I end the call and stare at my phone.

"Are you alright," Xanthus asks me as he takes my phone and sits it back by his.

I nod, "Yeah, I'm just in shock. I can believe they didn't tell me... He said my mom didn't ever want me to know. My birth mother's name is Luann. She's my mother's sister. And my birth father's name is Tin. He's a chimp and was a slave when I was born... There's still a lot I don't know, but my head is swimming. He wants me to come home for a family meeting first chance I get."

"May I come with you," ask Xanthus.

"You better come with me," I say as I lay back down with him, "You wouldn't make me face my mother alone on this?"

"No, I look forward to re-meeting your parents," he tells me.

"He said they're alive and well," I say as I remember my conversation with my father.

"Who," ask Xanthus.

"My biological parents," I answer, "He said they're a loving couple... that they love me... that they want me... I wonder if they miss me. There's so much I don't know."

"It sounds like your dad may be keeping in touch with them," comments Xanthus, "Maybe he knows where they live. After the family meeting, maybe you should meet them."

"What if they don't want to meet me," I say a bit afraid.

"He said they love you and want you," Xanthus reminds me. "They'll be anxious to see you."

Another thought pops into my head. I look Xanthus in his hypnotic blue eyes and state, "We can have a baby... I mean, if you want to have children, we can. Do you want children?"

"I want everything with you, Eleanor," is Xanthus loving answer. "I was afraid you wouldn't want to have a baby with me. I had a human girlfriend once. Her parent liked me until they found out I was a chimp. Shortly after that, she learned she was pregnant. I was initially excited when she told me. She hadn't known she could get pregnant by me and she didn't want our baby. She had an abortion, packed her things and left.

When chimp and gorilla women get pregnant, they have and keep their babies no matter who the father is," Xanthus shares with me. "It doesn't matter if the father is chimp, gorilla or human. They love their babies no matter what the father is. Chimps and gorillas are very aware that they can breed with humans because they've had babies by human men for generations. And now that we're free, most humans don't know because those men never claim their half chimp or gorilla children, half chimp half human is more common. I think that's how we've come to look so human. But now, if a human woman gets pregnant by a chimp or a gorilla, she has an abortion and never tells anyone. She acts as if never happened."

He sounds so sad. That woman really hurt him. "I love you, Xanthus. I want our baby." We kiss deeply and make love again.