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Chapter 7: Morph the anger into sadness, peasent

So, how did I take my sudden departure notice? Definitely not in a party mood.

I still remember trying to laugh everything off and telling my parents they’re hallucinating despite the sickening feeling in my gut. Can you blame me for that?

I knew (Don’t ask how) every word spoken by my parents was true. But accepting the fact that I have to leave my parents for who knows how long-was not my cup of tea.

Sure, they are not my real parents-heck; they are not even my species. They had hidden my real identity for 14 years. But they had also protected me and accepted me for who I am. They had given me a shelter, food and care. More than enough, they did not throw me away, which they very much could- if this isn’t enough to claim as my parents, then I don’t know what is.

But as much as I wanted to stay with them until the very end-I couldn’t. I learnt a valuable lesson that day.

Not everything in life goes according to our way.

I yelped as a giant plant with its enormous roots, flowy big petals and monstrosity brunches suddenly sprouted in one corner of the kitchen. Eyes widened, I breathlessly gazed at the beastly shrub. Its petals were bright orange, with maroon color spreading at the very first. Five sepals surrounded the, ugh-big and nasty stamen. It was the grossest thing I’ve ever witnessed, like a mixture of red jellybeans with freshly retrieved blood and corn flour. It wiggled in the center-much to anyone’s horror.

I can feel myself wanting to throw up the cheesecake I had earlier with my friend Greta while writing this, but wait, we’ll go to that after a teensy bit.

I gaped at the tree, and its brown brunches, leaves, flower (minus the center part) with a sense of emergency and throwing up.

‘I knew it,’ mom said, less thrilled as she craned her neck at the tree. ‘Spring would send some tricks to get her. They know who you are, Julia.’

‘Of course she does,’ dad said, his voice dripping with sarcasm and an underlying range. ‘She had contributed in the childbirth, after all.’

I swallowed back the lump forming at the back of my throat before saying, ‘So.. if I don’t go to that “training” thingy, spring will do what, exactly?’ It feels so weird to call a season as if it is a person, you know?

‘She will sprout these disgusting plants from time to time,’ mom said, her gazed zeroed somewhere far, ‘By the end of the day, if you decide not to leave, she will basically turn the house in a house in a garden and suffocate us with long nasty tendrils.

‘I have to leave? Just like that?’ I stared at mom, my feeling slowly dying inside.

Face grim, mom nodded. ‘I’m sorry, but this is for the best. For our safety-for your safety.’

I smacked my dry lips together.

‘And what if we head out somewhere else?’

“You mean, like, run away? Not going to work. These trees are going to follow us everywhere we go. We can’t escape from spring’s connection-unless in outer space.’ Mom explained.

‘So, like, you want me to be gone?’ I asked.

I watched as mom’s face twisted with pain. ‘No, never,’ she rasped out.

‘We have always considered you as our daughter. No matter what, how, where ever you are, it won’t change. We have loved you since day one. Would we do so much if we just wanted you “gone”?’

Fair point. I kept it silent, even when another giant plant popped up on, well, where our TV was previously placed. Not anymore, though.

I stood up. ‘I need some time alone.’ Saying this, I strode out of the room before anybody could say anything, not sparing a glance anymore. My head was throbbing but I choose to ignore it, because the pain in my chest was more painful and uglier.

I locked the door of my room and stood in the middle of my room. The silence of the place engulfed me.

It was 10 am. A clean Autumn day had appeared, with sun glowing with a yellowish golden hue. Sunshine peered across the blinds and filled up the small room in a golden hue. Nobody was at home on a busy workday morning. Everyone was at work or at school. Once or twice, the cringing bell of a cycle from any happy delivery guy rung through the roads.

And I stood there, alone. Everything was going so fast, my young mind couldn’t process these all. I still laugh at how my mind was panicking and trying to elope. But alas, none can escape fate. Destiny is really cruel.

Even though I wanted to run away, or hide, or not to believe anything, I knew that every word spoken by my mother was true. I was an eerie with any sheer doubt. My guts and intuition were all screaming association with my newfound identity. And a little voice at the back of my head was telling me to obey spring’s urge at any cost.

I curled my fist as broken feelings swirled in my chest. The frustration grew when a little twitting bird passed by the window. The sadness grew when I saw the still wrinkled sheets, making my vision blurry.

The world is playing and I’m just a toy.

Finally, it exploded. I fell on my knees and clutched on the ground. My whole body kept shaking as finally the unshed tears came streaming in, pouring on the floor continuously.

Everything seemed so unfair-it didn’t make any sense. Why did the seasons choose to make a new entire species? Why was I one of them? Why did I get parents in the first place and why was I withdrawing from them so early? I’m just a child!

Everything was a lie, a crucial reality masked with honeyed illusion; a double-edged sword slashing both parties, and a third party taking the advantage.

I clenched my teeth as a new feeling, along with sadness and frustration, rushed through my veins, something known as anger.

When I recall this memory, I still shiver at how horrific the situation was. I was a mere teen (I still am, but that’s off topic), struggling with the ability of differing from others since birth. Aging, I had faced so many growing pains, which resulted in many sleepless nights. And in a sudden, I lost my guardians, my only protectors whom I can kill for. Betrayal, separation, longing, anxiety; so many not-pleasing events were bottled in my 14 years’ old life. Just how much more I had to suffer? I was questioning myself in that day over and over again.

When you reach in a particular age, the world suddenly shifts. Unexpectedly, the things you loved in childhood seem like hot lava. Those who showered you with empty sweet words, take a chance to strike on your moment of confusion. Something happens and you are suddenly not yourself.

The world turns its back away from you.

Nobody can understand you anymore, nobody tries to.

I didn’t pick this. I wanted no supernatural powers or something which will make me look ‘cool’.

All I wanted to be was happy. I cherished every moment of living with my parents. The late night concerts with dad’s guitar and my spoons, finishing with mom’s yelling for making the kitchen messy. The occasional tours in country areas-inhaling the sweet ripe crop’s scent while our little car dashed forward, speeding off and wind swooshing behind, with rock music on full volume, much to the peaceful farmer grandma’s dismay.

Or the times when we sat on the roof, watching the sunset, basking in each other’s presence. No words spoken, only a comfortable silence lingering, and us huddled under a blanket together.

All of it was going away now.

Being taken away from me.

Finally, I sat up on the floor. My eyes stung from crying. Carefully wiping nose with sleeve, I gritted my teeth and knotted my eyebrows.

That’s it. This is over. I was only a temporary guest, staying with mom and dad for some years and causing them a headache. Now I can’t let them lose their life too. My call has come, and I needed to go. I must.

The seasons are playing a dangerous game, gambling with people, eeries and human feelings. Ain’t going to let it slide easily. I am going to face my destiny-let it be slavery or death.

Bring it on, spring.

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