1 Prologue

(Edited)

"Ahhrgh"

My legs halted on their own accords when I heard that scream: More precisely that voice that screamed. I turned around and ran. I ran as if I was running for the sake of dear life itself. My mind was clouded with a single thought,

"Not again, not again"

In my twenty four years of life, I have suffered the loss of losing many loved ones and somehow each time is more painful than the previous one. There are countless people who have lost their loved ones, and there are many who have suffered like me. But what I wonder about is why I have to be a part of their group or why they have to be a part of mine? Empathizing with faces that I have never crossed path with ever before might be a part of who I am, but my whole being has become a part of "suffering" itself. Therefore there was only one wish left in my already conked out heart,

"Please be safe"

The honking in the background dropped down a few decibels for my ears and the world around me blurred as if dust has accumulated on a glass window. I had a single destination in my mind: the source of that scream. After sprinting for a few meters I reached the crossroad. My eyes rested upon that man who was standing near a cat. Its whiskers were standing upright with anger; as if someone had stepped on its tail. A sigh found its way out of my tract and the blurry world begun to sharpen again which looked like someone is shoving the lingering dust away.

The man hauled up his head with a start to look in my direction. He screamed something. My eyes were bewildered while my mind had stopped functioning due to the sudden fright therefore I could not hear what he was saying. Even before a split second could pass, I realized that it was too late to listen anything anymore.

Crash

Warm blood gushed out of my head and I felt a sharp pain piercing in the broken tendons and ligaments of my limbs. My body was aching all over and my skin burned wherever it had got scratched. For the umpteenth time in the miserable life that I have lived, a burning desire once again found its way to my head,

Hopefully it will be the last time I ever close my eyes.

But this time one more thought, a little guilty and a little lonely one, also crossed my mind.

Aunty I am sorry, I wish I could see you for the one last time.

My eyes closed for what I wished to be forever.

************************************************

My eyes felt heavy when I tried to open them: as if they have gained weight and have inflated like a balloon (A meaty balloon that is). The yellowish light flooded into my eyes when I tried to wake up from my slumber. I stretched my sore muscles like a cat and jumped out of my bed to land on a brick built floor. I looked around and observed the grey walls which have cracked and spalled due to the constant cement corrosion-

Halt!

My thoughts halted immediately when I saw a scene that shattered my every thought and made me question my very existence.

A child, around the age of sixteen, was snoring in my bed!

I never liked skin ship and avoided even handshakes if possible. For a clean freak like me, to let anyone climb in my bed? Impossible. Were we this close? But no, no one was close enough for me to let them sleep in my bed. Not even Aunt Stella. I just hate the idea of going through the efforts of cleaning the sheets after such a happening. That is exactly why I have a one person bed with a big comfy couch back at home.

I banged my head with the brick floor when some horrific thoughts came into my mind.

No I didn't do it! I couldn't! I wouldn't!

Is it too late to die?

All of a sudden I felt a throb in my head. It was as if truth came hitting on my head with a hammer in hand, literally. However in reality it was just a sudden realization when those train of thoughts passed by my mind.

Die?

True! I was dead!

I faintly remember being hit by a car and slowly losing my consciousness as blood penetrated out of my head. A loud bang was heard sometime before I lost my conscious.

What was that bang after the crash? As if something blew up?

More importantly why was I even there?

I was dumb to not to have followed the traffic rules they keep shouting about. I was dumb to stand in the middle of the road. I was dumb to ignore the shouts for me to pay attention. More so, I was dumb to look back at that semi-stranger at all when he screamed, run to help when he didn't need any, and relieved to the point of going numb when he was alright.

That is when I realized that I felt lonelier than (what I thought to be) anyone else.....

A pathetic being that was searching for solace in the kindness of a stranger.

"Ahhhhhhhh"

But now was not the time to grieve the past that was already gone. It was time to look ahead- or rather right where nothing seemed right. The boy was still snoring soundly and I thankfully noticed that he was fully dressed and so was I; otherwise I might as well have had sacrificed my head to Kali*. I slowly got up from where I was banging my head on the floor and noticed something even more bizarre, which I technically did notice before but understood the implication of just now. The floor was build of bricks, the cemented walls were not painted and corroded to the point of collapsing and most astounding of them all was the wooden barn latch that even my old Aunt Stella doesn't use anymore.

It was not my home.

Where can you even find these in the city of Mumbai? Am I not in the urban settlement anymore?

I was fiddling with the old wooden latch which won't budge for even heaven's sake. Finally I was done with this nonsense and decided to break it and pay back the expenses later. This way at least they can install a more a sturdy door. I was smiling arrogantly and gradually started laughing quite sardonically as I thought such a good guy I-

"What are you doing there laughing like a mad man?"

-------------Footnotes

Kali*: A hindu goddess assosiated with time, destruction of evil and death in Shaktism. She is considered as the the consort of Lord Shiva.