10 Elder knows best

White Tides was lying face down on the rammed earthen floor in a pool of his own urine,blood, saliva, and feces. He rolled his tongue around in his mouth to dislodge his loose back molars. He counted counted two teeth in his spit before he allowed them to slide past his cracked swollen lips onto the floor. He inventoried the damage. Three of his teeth were chipped and a total of four were missing. I have no idea where the other two are unless I swallowed them he thought sullenly to himself.

"So Crane have you thought about the answer you have for me yet?" Elder Bi whispered taking a drag on his heather root pipe.

"I abandon that name years ago Bi. I put down the sword to take up the pen all at your behest. Golden Crane died from his egg hatched a Scholar." White Tides forced out a reply spitting out blood and phlegm as he did. After he cleared his throat he spoke a bit stronger.

"The boy is most likely Thomlin's spawn. I have a plan to get back what's ours with interest. My intel sources say that there's an 80% chance that the boy is his. The kid's mom is a stripper at a club that Thom frequented 20 some odd years ago. The story matches up to the boy's age"

"I know Thom as do you. If he was at a strip club do you think that woman was the only one that got pregnant?" Bi was blowing smoke rings while seated in White Tides stool by the desk. He took a sock off of the floor and began to wipe his bat clean.

"You are right Elder. There were a total of nine women who were with child. Three of the women aborted. That left six women who carried their children to term; of those six children one was hit by a school bus before he finished elementary school. Two were determined to have different fathers. Three candidates remained. The other two were far away and looked nothing like Thom in the photos I have of them. The boy's features are almost a carbon copy."

"How did he respond to the Cardinal Question?" Bi was becoming inclined to believe that the boy was Thom's.

"Fuck Bitches get money." White Tides was trying not to laugh because his ribs were cracked.

"No doubt that's the Pervert Prince's child." Bi was lost in thoughts of reclaiming the sect's glory. "Why do you think that Thom is going to cough up a ransom?"

"I never said it was going to work. There is a snowball's chance on the sun but there is still hope right?" White Tides replied quietly somewhat deflated.

The Elder got up out of the chair and walked up the stairs as he opened the trap door to the surface he looked back at the Scholar.

"The time of the Treasure Fair will be in the next month or so. I will need a full accounting of all our tradeable goods within a week. The Tinker will have to stop jerking his pud long enough to at least get some wagons made to haul them to Shivers Pass."

* Down by the pond

The sun was starting to tinge pink and Joe was on his 3rd round of drowning.

Jimbo was getting bored with watching so he went to the jobox on the back of his bike. Jimbo picked up a nudie magazine and his blade. He made a pantomime of weighing each one in his hands before he put the magazine back. He made a horse stance then drew his sword. A flurry of cuts so fast that the eye could barely follow happened. Several new rips in his tattered jumpsuit appeared.

Young Three tittered "Jimbo you haven't touched that piece of iron in years you are just going to hurt yourself if you keep at it."

"Yep Three you are probably right. The Treasure Fair is soon I was hoping to knock off the rust so I might impress some ladies.

If you pluck those eyebrows and stop looking so pissy you might find a husband at the fair."

Young Three only had one man on her mind right now he was still dead.

*Astral Wunderland

Joe was starting to hate the beach. The void called to him. He wished for an end.

"

I've died four times today I hope the Gym Donkey leaves me here. C'mere baby, daddy wants a kiss." He said this to one of the passing beauties on the beach as she walked by his chair.

"Sure thing hot lips! You do know that none of this is real right? You can't stay here with us." she giggled.

"The demon is back it's time for you to catch a ride again." He faded back to the real world.

"Ok Grubworm that was the last time for today. You can't just lie there on the rocks all day. While you were napping Jimbo found something that we thought was lost forever. He wants to give it to you." Young Three was holding strange looking stone headed club. It's handle was a piece of knotty dark wood about 4 ft long one end was split in half vertically while it was still green. A gray stone about the same size and shape of a brick was held in between the split with strips of uncured hide. The open area under the brick was filled in with what he assumed was tree sap. It gave off a feeling of ancientness.

"This recruit wants to know the name of this treasure." Joe responded with mock seriousness.

"This is the Axe of Dhume."

"First Sergeant this sounds like a weapon of great slaughter. How did it get the appellation of doom added to it's name?" Joe was getting excited now.

"Not doom you idjit. D- H- U -M -E." The Tinker informed him.

"This Dhume must have been a mighty warrior of an ancient tribe at least right First Sergeant?" Joe queried Young Three with less enthusiasm in his voice.

"No Grubworm, Dhume was a squatter that we found out in the woods that lived in a tree. He was eating maggots from a pig's carcass when we first met him. The poor fellow died of dysentery years ago. We named him Dhume because of an old letter that we found in his vest. Now it's your axe so if you die of the shits we will call it the Grubworm Axe."

"First Sergeant this recruit requests permission to get dressed and breakfast."

"You idjit it's almost 7:30 if you had wanted breakfast you should have gotten up earlier." Jimbo said matter of factly.

"No time for clothes either I'm afraid. Grubworm get into the back with me Jimbo is going to drop us so we can work."

They rode for about an hour until they reached the thicket. These bamboo were of many different lengths and sizes some were as big around as Joe's calves others less than the size of his wrists. The tallest of them were easily 30ft tall.

"Too bad Dhume didn't have a bulldozer am I right?" Joe said caustically.

Young Three's fist came across the truck bed. Instead of the fist striking his head as Joe was expecting and secretly hoping it stopped short of his nose as she extended a finger to thump his nose.

"Oww that fucking hurt First Sergeant."

"Shut your cock pleaser Grubworm. Get that axe in your penis peelers then get to work."

"Work is a four letter word that I've struck from my dictionary First Sergeant. This recruit requires a demonstration."

Young Three grabbed the axe from the back of the truck and swung down on the nearest piece of cane easily breaking it off close to the ground. She then took the Axe. to the downed reed and began to pulverize it causing all of the fibers to separate. Leaving nothing but strands of fluffy where the bamboo once was.

"Now it's your turn Grubworm." Young Three extended the axe handle first to her apprentice.

Joe took it from her and walked to a thin stalk.

He swung the axe with all of his might. *Thwack it struck the wood and rebounded out of his hand. He retrieved it from where it landed and tried again. Same result. The only difference was the bamboo had a small scratch in it on the second strike. He chopped again and again but the scratch got no deeper.

Young Three watched in silence. She thought to add some fuel to the fire.

"Grubworm if you can cut down even one of these stalks I'll take you someplace super special. Just keep at it. If you fail I promise a truly delightful hell."

She grabbed a stalk in both hands then gave it a strong jerk uprooting it as if it were no more than a piece of ragweed. She moved on to another stalk. She created a mound of reeds in moments.

Joe was not that surprised but moderately impressed. I guess she might actually be a cultivator not just a crazy person he thought to himself. He gripped the axe tighter and swung again. He wished he had some tunes to listen to so he thought the Soul Cleansing Sutra might be appropriate.

"Pain is weakness leaving the body. To piss excellence you must piss blood first. Thirst is a distraction a distracted mind cannot conquer the body. Pain is weakness leaving the body..." He continued the chant as he swung his axe. He fell into a trance.