A Nice Eggman fanfic

I've come to make an announcement; Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, he took his Hedgehog fucking quilly dick out, and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG, and I said that's disgusting, so I'm making a call out post on my Twitter dot com; Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick. It's the size of this walnut except way smaller, and guess what? Here's what my dong looks like: *deep inhale* PPPPPFFF!!! That's right baby! All points, no quills, no pillows, look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife, so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth. That's right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!!! Except I'm not pissing on the Earth, I'm gonna go higher: I'm pissing ON THE MOON!!! How do you like that, Obama? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU EEDIOT!!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss dpbpbroppplets hit the Earth. Now get outta my fucking sight... Before I piss on you too.