37 :: No Regrets ::

There was just so much about the world of the past, that had gone 'missing' in my world. I was curious to know and find the answers that Cullen would not give me.

Every thought in my mind would not go unread by the demon himself, and this fact put me at a disadvantage.

If only Cullen was just a normal human, would everything be different? But if then, maybe I would not be reborn, or be who I would be now. Everything came at a price.

I took a few steps ahead, surveying the rest of the museum with extreme ardour. Such traditional ways of the world… where had they gone? How had my world come to be what it was, having a realistic environment devoid of humane emotions not to mention so much greed and ego? Where had all these natural sights, pleasant feelings, smiles, and traditional practices all gone?

"Shengyi, are you having a good time learning now?" he queries me coldly.

I don't exactly know why he has brought me on this 'learning trip', and he won't tell me. So how can I answer him?

"Cullen, I still don't know..." I mumble.

He folds his long arms in front of his chest and deepens his smiles, exhibiting two rows of perfect white teeth. 

"Shengyi, there's a lot you don't know yet, and it isn't the time to know. Your rebirth and our union come for a reason."

I shrug. Though he can read the thoughts in my head, I completely cannot even read his face, much say his thoughts. In spite of what he could be keeping from me for the time being, is not within my control. A mystery that has yet to be unfolded, I sigh.

We have cleared the entire museum and its exhibits, so what else is there to do here?

"What do you want to do now?" I glance at him carefully. "Is there anything else you would like to do here?" 

  "My dear Shengyi, I was waiting for you to pop the question." 

I throw at him a very annoyed glare. "Cullen, you should know that I cannot read your mind."

"Do you really want to read my mind?" He lifts up my chin and stares penetratingly into my surprised eyes. My heart flutters at his sudden gesture. I panic, wondering what is on his mind. He takes my hand and presses his palm into mine. Almost immediately, a vision clouds my mind.

This is what he wants me to see.

A young boy… sitting alone watching some other, older boys. They all have long hair in different colours. But the difference between the boy and the others is that he does not have horns on his head. He looks confused and lost.

I sense the dismay in his heart. This dismay is followed by a message.

[In this world, only the strongest will survive. I struggled with being different. I was singled out. And then, I will only get stronger until I find my place at the top.]

Was the boy Cullen and why did he show me a vision that showed him at his weakest point?

The vision ends, and I snap out of the trance earlier. Cullen is watching me calmly.

"Cullen, the vision..."

"This is only what I can show you at this moment. I was once weak, but I worked hard to become what I am now," he explained, without a tinge of emotion in his eyes. I embrace him tightly, realising the side such a powerful and emotionless being had. After seeing his memory, I am moved to hold a deeper feeling for him in my heart.

I didn't expect there was much to this cold demon. Firstly, he had the power to fascinate and cause me to yield to him, and every part of him carried weight in my heart. On the other hand, he was 'different' because he did not have horns like his demon brothers. I wanted to know more about this demon, and how he came to be who he was. Did he say he wanted marriage? What could someone of such vast power require from a human girl?

We headed out of the museum, walking slowly on the warm pavement. Blades of green grass adorned the ground, enticing me to pull a small wildflower from the ground.

"Contamination, my dear."

His words stop me from what I was planning to do earlier and I watch him confusedly.

"Don't forget, we are not from this world. We are susceptible to contamination," he repeats in a monotonous voice. I retract my hand, still eyeing the wildflower. He seems to take note of the fact that I liked flowers.

"You are fond of natural sightings?" he questions me, although he pretty much might already have the answer in his mind. I nod weakly. 

"As expected, such things cannot be found in your world."

"What world are you from, then?" 

"I roam the planes freely and belong to any world I wish to be in," he grinned playfully.

"How did you come to me when I was on the verge of suicide in my past life?"

"Fate, my dear Shengyi. It was fate that brought us together."

I am speechless, and I can only stare at him with bewilderment written all over my face.

"Demonic fate. It is like the red thread of fate between humans, just more… more compelling and binding."

His words cause me to tremble even more fervently and I still remain speechless, staring into his eyes.

"I have to repeat this: you are mine, then, now, and the future. Our fate is bound to each other."

I don't know a single bit about fate between a demon and a human, so I try to open my mouth to ask. He answers almost immediately.

"Unlike humans, a demon can have multiple partners. It's up to you to decide whether you can hold me from that, or if you wish to see me with another, lesser concubine."

I feel my cheeks turn red. I am desperate, but my reflexes act quicker than anticipated. I smack him right across his face.

"How could you?" I holler, forgetting my place. I am unable to recall that I was capable of such anger or jealousy. Just like how he is a jealous person himself, I myself am not fond of the idea of Cullen hugging another. When I thought he was Cullen Fu, I was already uneasy about the fact that he changed lovers like clothing.

The smack on his face seems to not affect him at all. He just takes my hands and holds them over my head, pushing me against a tree. I am embarrassed as my mind fills with all the mischievous things he could do to me while I am restrained.

"I said, it's up to you to do all you can to maintain your status quo as my only woman."

"Shameless!" I yell, trying my best to break free, but it is as if shackles are on my hands. I cannot move. I struggle to push some distance between us. I am still mad about what he has just said, that he can have other lovers and not just me. Hadn't he said before that he only wanted me?

I notice his lips moving, as if muttering an incantation, but the words he says are inaudible. Lights flash around us, irritating my eyes so badly that I close them abruptly. When I open my eyes again, we are in some unfamiliar space. The sound of water in the area calms my mind. Another natural habitat, I realise. I reckon that he must have brought me here since I admitted my love for natural sightings.

"Now, we are alone," he whispers, fondling me slowly with his deft fingers. I release a soft moan as waves of pleasure rush through me. I don't care what is about to happen next. All I just want is him.

His lips caress mine gently and I allow his tongue to slip into my open mouth.

What would it be like to take a step further with the cold demon? I could not help wondering.

[Do you want more, my dear?]

I shiver again, this time a lot more madly than before. Forget virtues, forget that I am a virgin, and forget that I was angry earlier. I was curious to know the answer, above all questions I had in my mind. His kisses tasted sweet and boldly, I guided his hand under my thin dress.

[Tell me you want me, then I will give you what you want.]

His voice resounds in my mind, thrusting me into ecstasy. Even just his touches are enough to make me spasm with desire. Mortal desire. I do not consider it a sin, since it is with this man - no, demon, that I like and am already bounded by fate with. 

I want you, Cullen.

[Tell me that you want to be mine.]

As I say the words in my mind, clearly and without regret, a cloud of darkness, complete with swirling shades of red and purple, envelope us. I moan his name loudly.

He just kisses me harder, not willing to let go.