5 Chapter 5

AN: No answers this time... sorry, next chapter. This and last week was hectic, an aunt passed away so they left me in charge of the family business.

I got scammed by an "artist" for Vtuber model, for 250 dollars and 6 months of waiting. I mean she's the GF of a friend of mine and she graduated with a digital art degree, she's supposed to know how to draw and well lets just say it left me pretty pissed off.

Never let someone bully into buying anything from them. I mean it took her 6 months of waiting for something that looks made in paint.

On the bright side of this past 2 weeks of work that kicked my ass, as in too much shit went down. Some friends began a DnD campaign with a twist; as in every character is a piece of shit. I'm a Druid, High noble Elf that is racist, Xenophobic, egotistical and sees everything that isn't an elf as inferior and/or servants. This led to quite a few hilarious situations with a human mage with Tourette Syndrome that is afraid of women, a half Orc with a negative INT stat and Tiefling with Schizophrenia and a drinking problem.

This will be a small chapter, since work is kicking my ass. Arriving home at 8:30 PM to have dinner listening to news and boot up my PC at 9:30 leaves me pretty burnt out; with enough energy to play a few games of Apex (Wattson and Valkyrie main4life) and a game of League. Only to fall asleep at around 1-2 AM. and start the next day at 8:00 AM.

Anyway enough about me I needed to vent a little.

Promise on answering comments through here, also description says it on Pacific Time, so its my Sunday and Monday on some other places just FYI.

Onto next chapter.

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As I finish placing the last number of the calculation with my pencil I take in the emptyness of this place; no screaming, crying, worries about the box, hell even worrying about whats for dinner.

"Mother fucker!" I yell at myself outloud as grocery shopping slipped my mind. "Fuck." Grabbing my wallet shoving it into the sad thing that pockets in female part are and make my way towards the nearest market. Racking my brain trying to remember if I saw something aside of a convenience store as my mind can't recall one of those.

Reaching the end of the stairs as the sound of a cheap small TV makes its way to my ears, keys in hand as well as phone and wallet in my pockets; I knock on the door of the reception. 'PLEASE GOD! LET IT NOT BE THAT GUY.' Only for the same guy to open the door. 'FUCK YOU GOD!' I cant help but grumble as his eyes land on me. "What do you want?" Then his eyes go to my chest. 'Wow that's annoying. Is that how women feel when that happens? It's infuriating.'

"Yes, I need to know where do I get groceries?" He didn't bother lifting his gaze.

"Two blocks down that way, then one to the right and then a left middle of the block on the right side of the road." His tone is bored as his gaze doesn't move, taking a few steps back I begin to make my way towards the grocery store, not long after I can feel eyes on me as the sound of footsteps make themselves known to my ears. Turning back I can notice that whoever is following me wants something. 'Did they found me? Or is it just some creep? If they found me black vans would be making their rounds.' My eyes travel around the street, looking at the cars driving past, my ears taking in the surroundings.

"Hey girl you need a friend?" His voice sounds hoarse; his mouth smells like alcohol and smoke that I recognize as weed. He steps towards me speeding up and walking beside me, he is slouched, his skin dirty as well as the rags that he's wearing. "You ignoring me?" He asks as I'm focused on getting to where I'm going. My senses warmed me as an attempt to grab me was made, moving my arm to dodge and take a few steps back.

"Leave me alone dude, I don't have time for this." I snapped at him.

"Whoa! You on your days?" Did he actually say that... glaring at this dumbass and turning around to keep walking. "If you smile you'll be prettier. Ya know? Maybe I can give you my number and be your friend." 'Do guys not understand, was I ever like that? wait, was I? I'm a girl, not a guy? What the fuck?' I can still hear him walking behind me but didn't say anything as he kept following me. 'Does this guy only bother women?' I mean he smells like it.

Out of the corner of my eye a woman that is a bit overweight with tan skin and black hair made eye contact with me. "HEY! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?" The woman has a thick accent that I can't place; she walked towards me with a smile on her mouth as her eyes share worry.

"S-so-rry... sorry."

"its okay, and you! ¿Que te dijimos? ¡ALEJATE! GO, stop bothering her! Or I'm calling the police again." He just glared as he walked the other way. "Ugh, me caga ese güey." I didn't understand what she said but the hate in her voice is clear that its something bad. "Y tú, what the fuck are you doing out at this hour?" He glare is powerful, I feel like shrinking under her gaze.

"Ah-I- Ah." She walked towards me until she's in front me of me.

"If you we're in my country, you would be already getting kidnapped or sold. With your looks, you're in trouble." That called my attention.

"Wh-w-why?" She sighed as she pulled me towards the door she came out of.

"If you haven't noticed you're a girl, una muchacha. You have to be careful... this may be the USA but it's still peligroso. Even more if you're a girl."

"But-"

"No buts, any man will see you as weak. That guy, is just some weird guy. Just be careful and don't be out too late or something horrible te va a pasar. It will happen to you." From the last part I only got that something horrible might happen to me.

"I need to be careful?" I asked in a low voice.

"Yes, what are you doing out? ¿Que haces afuera a esta hora?" She paused as she began to look at me, my hand interlocked as my shoulders are almost at my cheeks. "How old are you?" Her voice softened.

"Sixteen."

"Ay, mi amor..."

"I have to get groceries... I need to buy food for this week." Mumbling to myself before she got closer I walked towards the market that is a block away.

"¡Ahi vengo! Regreso en media hora." The woman caught up to me with a little difficulty as she began to pant lightly.

"You're fast." She said as we settled in a light pace. "You're new here?"

"Yes... I moved here today."

"That's nice..." The silence got awkward fast. "I've been living here for fifteen years." She gave me company through the entire trip, even to reach the entrance of the apartment complex.

"Thank you, for giving me company." I can only say thanks to her kindness.

"Denada honey, be careful and don't be out too late." She said with care that seems impossible for someone to show. 'Do people actually help others?' Placing everything on the table followed everything going to different pantries, fridge and thanking whatever god exist in this universe as I take a seat and look at the clock on the wall. 10:42 that time is giving me enough to feel the emptiness in my stomach as the only sound is the noise of cars honking, trains passing and some noisy neighbors.

"Wow, I am alone." A cold chill passes through my body that makes everything feel cold, as my heartbeat pounds in my ears accelerating ever so slowly, my stomach feels like it sinks as if giving way for no food or oxygen. My thoughts crowd my head, the memories of loneliness, the rejection, punches, and the darkness. My head feels foggy as if I'm standing in the middle of a crowd at a mall, too much noise, too much sound, nothing makes sense bile rises up my throat as my heart pounds on my chest, rushing to the sink my stomach empties itself leaving a nasty and transparent bile making my strength leave my body ending up with me clutching my knees as tears slowly fall from my eyes.

"What the fuck?!" I mumble to myself, as my body shakes. My head is so filled with noise. "SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Yelling as loud as I can makes everything go silent as soon as I closed my mouth. "Thanks." My chest hammers as I look at the paper that fell in front of me, probably from when I made my way to the sink. It's my notebook, the page it settled is one with a detailed drawing of the arc reactor and a list of the components that it originally uses.

"Steel, Titanium, Platinum, Copper, Gold, Silver, Lithium, Palladium." I said aloud as my mind focused on the elements and its use. "Copper, Gold, Lithium, Palladium, Silver, Steel, Titanium."

Arranging it in alphabetical order it slowly made sense, "Copper, Gold, Lithium, Palladium, Silver, Steel, Titanium." My heartbeat calmed down as my stomach settled. "Copper, Gold, Lithium, Palladium, Silver, Steel, Titanium." After that fourth time, my stomach settled and my heart rate returned to not a preoccupying state. "Copper, Gold, Lithium, Palladium, Silver, Steel, Titanium." For good measure, I don't know what happened, or how it happened but it worries me a lot.

Deciding to ignore it and move on, notice that its 11:09 'Where did the time go?' Sighing and standing up, I began to prepare enough food for me for the next few days, not emptying my groceries. 'Maybe I can cook one day a week.' After a grueling hour of different filling food that I barely remember the basics of how to cook. My mind is hazy on some things that I should remember but they don't make much sense.

Taking the first bite of chicken I almost spat it out. 'Its dry.' Well, turns out I'm bad at cooking, who would've thought. Fuck me, there is a lot more chicken.

Turns out, I'm scared of the dark.. who would've thought about that. I can't handle darkness at all, which lead to me sleeping with the light of the bathroom on and the door open.

"I don't even know what I'm doing... It's modeling, fuck my life."

"Cindy Moon?" A voice of a girl called my attention; she has pants and short hair while holding her smart phone. 'I miss faster internet and faster phones.'

"Yes, hi."

"Follow me; I'll give you the rundown of what will happen." She picked up the pace, her short stature made way towards section that has a lot of equipment for lighting, backgrounds and a lot of cameras as a man looks like he's losing his mind yelling.

"Where is that girl she told me about?"

"Here sir." He turned towards me; I notice he's wearing a grey fedora and a vest, a shaven face and brown jeans that seem a bit short on his ankles.

"You do look tacky." His voice drawled in disgust as he saw me.

"These are the nicest ones I own."

"Burn them. You also don't have makeup, that's good."

"I never learned how to apply it." Answering his comment he hummed.

"So you're natural?" He looked at my face from different angles as she took my chin turning it from side to side. "Perfect symmetry, huh." He moves my hair. "A scar on your eyebrow and one under your bangs... I can work with this, yeah scars are sexy. I'll be your manager, follow." He said as it looks like everyone is setting everything up and almost done. "When I say you arrive at noon you arrive at 11, am I clear?"

"Yes." I answered immediately, years of obedience after all.

"Alright, now that we're a bit farther away from everyone, I need you to learn how to smile. You know how to smile?"

"Uhh, yes?" My doubt is clear as his eyes deadpan at me.

"Uhuh, do it." I smiled. "Nope, that's creepy."

"But that's my smile."

"No, that's a forced grin. You look like a child that has chocolate around his mouth. Also your teeth are white, that's a relief."

"Then how do you smile?" Not even five minutes and I'm frustrated.

"Smiles, reach your eyes, you need to smile and for it to reach your mouth and eyes look up. Also don't you dare show your gums." I'm following his instructions. "Smile, No! don't show your gums. Close your mouth, not that much, show me pearly whites, good. Now, your eyes focus on this square." He made a square with both hands placing them like a camera. "Give me coy smile. No that looks like you're hungry, no that's a look of constipation. Think about desire, something you really like but can't show it. Again that's hunger. That's it! You're a natural thank the Lord. You can stop." I dropped the smile massaging my cheeks. 'What the fuck, that hurts!'

"Is there anything else I should know about?"

"Like what?"

"Allergies?" That word sent me back to before the bite, my lungs were weak as shit and I sneezed over anything.

"No... Well I did get shot when I was fourteen."

"Let me see the scar." His face turned serious and his tone has no more cheer.

"I can show the one on my shoulder." Lowering my T shirt from my shoulder so he could see.

"One?"

"Oh, I got shot twice."

"Shit, sorry about that... What about the other one?"

"That one is on my leg."

"Who did this to you?"

"A bully, she used to punch me to her hearts content, but one day I fought back but that was a bad idea."

"Hmm, and you're okay... I mean physically?"

"Yes, no limp no nothing. It went straight through and I got lucky."

"Good." He turned around as scanned the surroundings. "It seems everyone arrived on time. Give me your college schedule so I can schedule shoots around that time." We made our way back to the crew that seemed to station itself with an RV that looks like a movie star set.

"I can tell it to you right now."

"No, just go to makeup and then go get dressed. It's in the RV." He smacked me in the back. With doubt in my step and walking into the RV, people are seated as other worked on brushes on their faces, hair among other things, well mostly women and girls that look way too pretty to be real.

"Over here!" The voice of a blonde girl with a stripe of pink made itself know as she waved at me. Moving quietly and quickly made my way to her.

"Take a seat, we need to do this fast. Have you applied base or anything?"

"No. What's that?"

"That's not possible, your skin is perfect!" Her accent sounds like it's not from here. "Alright then, now let's make this into perfection." She began a process that took as much time as when I had to get prettied up for prom which was like 15 minutes.

"There, this should go with the shoot. The hair as well, what product do you use?" That seemed to call the attention towards me.

"UHM, regular soap?"

"Then you miss are lucky with strong genes, what's your name? I'm Kelly." She stretched her hand out.

"Cindy." I shook hers, another woman came up to me with a top, shorts and what looks like a summer dress.

"These are your clothes." The woman said as she made me stand up. "Get changed out those rags. I need to measure you. What's your height?"

"Five, six."

"So Five seven, now I need your three sizes." She began to pull at my clothes but in the moment my shirt was tugged I felt fear run through me as images of darkness ran through me and jumped away holding my strength back, only a few steps that seemed to spook everyone. "I'm not comfortable with that."

"I'm sorry, I thought you-" a hand on my shoulder made me flinch.

"Cindy, are you okay? You're shaking." I didn't notice I was until noticing how my hands are shaking.

"Y-y-yes. Let's get this over with. Just not in front of everyone here." I mumbled as everyone returned to work.

"Okay then, let's get to the changing room." She led me to the back that is closed off by a curtain.

"Now I will let you get undresses so I can measure you." Doubt fills my mind.

"I need you to keep a secret. By no means can you tell anyone." My whisper is serious, as she only nods. Taking off my shirt, knowing the lady in front of me won't do anything. "Don't ask questions please." I unclasp my bra and as it falls as well as my shirt I can hear her gasp. She traces the bullet scar, her finger travels across two scars left by screws and nails before I move away.

"Wh-"

"Shh. No one." She nods in seriousness. "Please not even my manger." She only nodded as she made began to work measuring my body sizes. When everything was done she just ran away holding the clothes in her hands. 'Hopefully she won't rat me out.'

Not even five minutes went by when she returned. "Here, the first shoot is summery, so these shorts will help you cover those." She motioned to my leg as I got dressed.

"Leave that bag to me. I'll take care of it." The tailor said to me.

"Thanks." As I walked out everything was in place, cameras, lights and everything in between.

"Alright, places everyone!" My manager, calls to everyone to get ready. Following the general direction of the people who are well dressed they gather with him just out of the place where cameras and lighting is aimed at. Four girls that holy shit are stupidly attractive, as in comparing 1 on 1 park basketball to NBA finals; ie, it's incredible how attractive they are.

"Cindy!" He motions over to me with a wave of his hand.

"Girls, this is Cindy. As of today she's going to work with us. She'll be part of this shoot. Treat her nice." He says as their eyes land on me, their eyes narrow as they scan over my body. 'I've had bullies try to kill me, I can take mean comments.' A blonde with a sharp face and really bright blue eyes comes close to me extending her hand with a smile on her face.

"Hi! I'm Mandy and OMG I love how your skin looks!" She grabs my hand carefully and places two fingers on the back of my palm. "Oh right, these people are Jamie, We call her Jay." The brunette with streaks of blonde, tan skin and sea green eyes smiles at me. "The other blonde is Erica." She nods as I notice she's the tallest of the bunch. "Last but not least is Alana." The last girl with black straight locks, amber eyes and dark skin.

"Nice to meet you."

"Same."

"Cin, is it cool if I call you Cin?"

"Yeah?" I am completely out of my depth of someone being friendly towards me.

"Alright girls! We're ready. Cindy, you're going last pay attention, Mandy and Alana!" Both nodded as their smiles left their faces as both walked over to the assigned places. What proceeded was a learning experience. Follow directions, stay still, don't break character, don't react, make the show not about yourself but what the product is selling, give the outfit character and above all look perfect.

"Stop scowling or your forehead will have lines."

"Oh, sorry." Following her instructions and focusing on maintaining a blank face.

"There you go."

"Thanks."

"No problem, you're still new. Make sure to have a neutral expression or practice your smile." Erica said as she motioned towards the shoot.

"You're nervous, first time?"

"Yes... I... I have no fucking idea on what to do."

"Don't worry you're gorgeous, you'll do fine." The memories of the people mocking me, among other things completely shattered my confidence on how I look.

"What did I say about that expression?" She pulled me out of the memories.

"Right, my bad."

"Erica! Jamie!" Erica's smile disappeared as a neutral smile made its way to her face.

"Huh. I need to learn how to do that."

"Did you see what I did? I was amazing!" Mandy said as she laughed making her way towards me as she pulled Alana by the arm.

"Cin! Did you?"

"Y-y-yes."

"Don't stutter, you're too pretty for that!" How can I not! Literally she's drop dead gorgeous.

"Yup." Alana said as she agreed. Paying close attention for the next shoot since after that I was next; I'm in need of a crash course.

"Mandy, do you think you could give me a crash course?"

"Nope." My scowl made its way to me. "And it's not because of me! Michael told me not too!"

"Ohh so that's his name!" I couldn't help myself from reacting. Staying quiet for the next half hour as the shoot advanced it was my turn.

"Cindy!" Moving robotically to the center imitating the others, I followed the instructions. Smile, hand on hip, puff my chest out. Get yelled at, it felt surreal as the flashes went off and the clicks became a relaxing sonata.

"There we go! Alright everyone take ten. Girls, I need you on second outfit! Quickly, were burning daylight! We rushed to the RV and made our way to dressing.

"Here." A bra got placed in my hands.

"Uhh what?"

"Fixed it up for you, the one you have is three sizes too small."

"I can't pay for this." I whisper as my hands shove the undergarment towards her.

"It's free, I'm sure you'll thank me later." She said as she handed me the summer dress.

"Put this on, or you'll be late." Her voice came out soft as she gently guided me.

"R-right." I can only nod as in less than 3 minutes I'm out the changing room and walk towards where everyone was already waiting.

"Now for this I'll need everyone by themselves, Cindy you're first." Michael said as now there is a chair, a giant fan and all cameras are pointed at the skyline of New York. As the shoot went by eventually the night settled and with it the chilly cold air filled around us. At least we had an hour to eat, until my now manager gives out the order that the shoot is over. 'That was exhausting.'

See you next Sunday!!! HOPEFULLY!!