31 || Chapter 29 || Am I Really Cursed? ( Part 1 )

Moulin leaned back comfortably on the couch, his intertwined hands resting on his knee.

Pulling his brows together into a frown, Colahn bowed his head as he sat on the identical velvet couch opposite to the silver-eyed youth. He landed at the two older brothers behind the third young master's seat, they stood eyeing him with identical cold eyes.

Colahn could not blame them. Their affection for their youngest brother was certainly mad and blinding, every single person within the estate was fully aware of it, including him. Ever since Moulin came back, the atmosphere within the manor had changed terrifically. The previous mournful and grievous air before Moulin's rescue abruptly vanished, and along with Moulin's tremendous transformation, his sudden change in personality completely shocked the whole estate. And not more sooner, Moulin once again stirred the whole Noble circle with the unveiling of his hidden ability.

This young man sitting collectedly before Colahn was no longer the once reckless and conceited little man. He was now a courageous young bird ready to flex its wings for flight.

The more Colahn looked at Moulin, the more curious he felt.

"Young master, when did you awaken your maeruthan abilities?"

Moulin slightly lowered his lids. "In truth, I do not know when it had awakened. Days after my carriage was attacked by thieves, I was given the chance to run into the woods. I have no recollection of what happened afterward. I woke up inside a cave beneath a glacial mountain of the north, the colors of my hair, and my eyes had changed and I was lost of why it happened. There was a river not far from the cave and there I had discovered my abilities as a maeruthan".

"Did you consumed anything before you had discovered your powers?" Asked Colahn.

"I had starved for days after the attack. I knew of nothing about any survival skills".

"Then was there someone who helped you cultivate? Were you not alone in the northern mountains?"

"No…"

Moulin paused when a word abruptly joined in. He glanced at Maxille behind him. Colahn too was surprised.

Maxille suddenly interrupted, his voice low, and his brows furrowed. "There wasn't anyone but him. He lived inside the cave where he had awakened, there were no signs of another person joining him. There laid by the corner of the cave were fur pelts, enough for one person to sleep on. Other than that, there wasn't anything else except a few rocks and icicles hanging from above".

Before Colahn could open his mouth Maxille glared at him and hissed, "Do not doubt me, I know what I saw".

The Head seer closed his mouth and looked at the young heir for a moment before nodding. Of course, when it came to the first young master, Colahn knew very well how Maxille was in person. He wasn't the type to lie when it comes to Moulin's sake. He softened his look and continued to question Moulin.

"Then how did this young master learn to withstand the cold and survive the days alone in the wilderness?"

Moulin's eyes suddenly softened as if he was reminiscing good times which was an unusual thing for someone who had endured the harsh wintry woods, surviving alone.

"I met a little fox who wouldn't stop following me where ever I go…" he smiled. "Before I discovered my abilities he was the one who led me to the river. After my powers had awakened, I knew I couldn't just sit and wait, waiting for death. To exit the mountain was as difficult as entering it, let alone staying for weeks alone in the wintry woods. I would rather die with my family close to me than to die alone, helpless and foolish. So I learned to bleed and to sweat for my food, my warmth, and my survival".

He glanced at his father, whose eyes we're reddening, and returned his gaze to Colahn. "…I taught myself how to fight, I walked into deep seas of snow to hunt, I washed my wounds in freezing waters and I endured the blood beneath my fingernails when I skinned animals for my warmth. It sounds absurd and unbelievable, yes. But if you were in my place, once lavishly pampered and cared to sitting alone in the dark cave of freezing ice, hoping for someone and wishing for death at the same time, I believe you will think that life had given you a shameful slap on your cheek. As a son of the Fraunces Nobility, I will persevere and repent. So in those hard times, even the dimmest of light will drag you back up on your feet and you will struggle to survive to relive your life once again".

"In those months, I have never questioned the origins of my abilities. Because I believed it was a chance the gods had given me. Giving me the choice of whether I will use it to carry on with living in those woods of terror or to use it to end my life in the simplest way possible. I do not wish to shamefully resign my fate to the hands of death, as if I was once again running away from everything like a disgraceful coward. I had bore the name of the Fraunces family and I will persist with living even if others drag me with filthy hands. That is what brought me here, breathing and never the one who I was once before".

Moulin finished as he stared at the stupefied man sitting before him. There was a sorrowful silence in the air, choking the breaths out of every person's throat. The three people of Moulin's family had stiffened, hands clenching secretly as they pondered about the life Moulin had lived alone in a place no one would dare to enter.

Colahn's hands were unusually sweaty as he stared at the silver-eyed youth. He could not believe the most doted person of the Fraunces family had forcibly experienced such severe moments. He could clearly imagine the inexperienced youth confused and helpless to the dangers threatening his life. But it was because of those experiences that Moulin had become better, stronger, and developed. He was still young, had just come to age. With his sickly body enduring the backlash of awakened mana and the bitter life within the northern mountains, it was presumably painful and unbearable.

"Anything else, Head Seer?" Moulin asked.

"Y-yes…" Colahn brought himself back from his thoughts "… How did you learn to use your mana? Only a maeruthan who have mastered the basics of his ability would be able to control it and most of all summon their sacred weapon".

Moulin blinked. He stared confusingly at Colahn.

His silence stretched for five seconds as Colahn furrowed his eyebrows. Was the question too hard to understand? But Moulin had understood the previous one.

Moulin tilted his head as he creased his eyebrows. He squinted his eyes "Can't a maeruthan learn by themselves? Must they really need a mentor?… I'm sorry. It is just that its the first time I've heard of this...".

Colahn was patient and he was happy to explain it to Moulin.

"Well when a maeruthan's ability is awakened, their senses are dulled when they try to seek their internal bodies. So they cannot openly cultivate without a second person clearing away the impurities or consuming an enriching capsule or meditating submerged in the holy pool at the temple. The impurities in your internal body are difficult to cleanse that is why there are specific means to purify one's internal body. You, young master, as I have heard and witnessed, have already managed to use your abilities and are also able to summon a sacred weapon. How did you purify your internal body?"

Moulin cocked his head. His hands ceased fumbling the clothe on his knee. There was evidently a confused expression on his face exposed to every inside the room. Indeed, it was true, he really did not realize there was such a method particularly that important. He didn't remember the voice even instructing him to do anything involving the things Colahn had said, judging by Maxille and Emlen's looks what the Seer had spoken about seemed to be true.

Moulin did not conceal the complication on his face as he spoke.

"I did not need to do any of those things. To be honest, I didn't know there was such an important thing. When I had awakened my ability I was already able to seek and cultivate my internal body. I was able to use my powers freely without anything hindering me..." His voice faded away as he realized the change of Colahn's expression in front of him.

Colahn gaze was unfocused as he tried to look at the young master clearly. What did he just hear?

Thud!

A loud noise of a chair falling backward sounded across the room. The sound was so sharp and loud it startled Moulin on his seat.

He quickly turned his head to his father who had stood up abruptly "Fathe-".

"Speak up"

Lord Dontae Fraunces spoke as he waited for the Seer's next words. His steel gray irises sharpened like the edges of lethal spears ready to imbed into his soul. Colahn then knew he couldn't make the situation light, he needed to face it.

Emlen and Maxille's expression was worse no lesser as they neared to carefully listen.

"Young master…" Colahn faced Moulin, his tone serious and calm.

Moulin did not understand the direction of the conversation. What was his father so worked up about? What was wrong about dependent cultivation?

He pursed his lips as silence descends inside the room. Colahn had paused for a moment before once again speaking to him. "There are only a handful of people who can greatly master their abilities and open their internal bodies as freely as you. The reason why you don't need to purify yourself is because your body is already pure since you were inside your mother's womb, it was already cleansed since you have been born. This is a heavenly blessing given rarely to maeruthans… it is very unearthly" He looked at the third young master, there was fawning in his tone.

However, Moulin knew this wasn't what Colahn really wanted to relay to him. "What else?…"

"Pardon?"

Moulin drew his eyebrows together into a frown, "If it is such a remarkable thing then why do I hear pity in your voice?".

"…" Colahn didn't know how to react. He couldn't even force himself to hide it. Glancing helplessly at the Lord standing by his long desk, he powerlessly looked at Moulin with a complicated gaze. "As I have said, maeruthans having similar circumstances like yours are extremely rare, If my memory is correct, there were three pured maeruthans bearing quite a similar situation like yours. Their talents grew to be incredibly powerful… However, they have never lived their lives merrily"

"What do you mean?"

Colahn lowered his gaze and exhaled as he replied, "… they are all cursed".

Cursed? Moulin drew his brows together as he looked at Colahn. Unknown to him, his hands were already pressing against his thighs. What did he mean by cursed? He knew this world was already as bizarre as it can be but hearing about curses and spells still sounded a bit alarming and ominous.

As if Colahn could sense his confusion and anticipation, the seer continued "People such as yourselves are called Pured maeruthans. I know of only one Pured, he is an elven mage apprentice coming from the Gaial lands of Meian. Little have remembered him. Like you he didn't need to cleanse his internal soul after his awakening when he was a child, he lived glorified and distinguished. But he lived his life pitifully… the pured could not live their aged years, their lifespan is shorter than a normal human... Young master-"

"That is enough…" Maxille interrupted, his eyes bore a distinct chill, anger incinerating his patience.

Colahn lifted his head and looked at Maxille with complex eyes. Moulin was silent as he processed the Seer's words. His eyes were unfocused as he lowered his gaze staring at the blue veins visible beneath the pale skin of his clenching hands. He ignored his eldest brother behind him and his thoughts continued to run chaotically.

Shorter lifespan?…

𝐶𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑎𝑔𝑒𝑑 𝑙𝑖𝑣𝑒𝑠…

His skin crawled once he thought about the empty bottle of pills by his bedside and the freezing cold biting into his skin as his flesh turned to ice. Right now, one thought floated inside his mind. He was going to die?

He swallowed unconsciously. Was... Was this life really not a gift of hope given to him? Was this life not a pitiful second chance mercifully given to him? He should've known… he should've known…

He had lived so comfortably, gained the family he had dreamed of, had the chance to become stronger… yet he was oblivious of the pitiful future creeping closer to him, lurking in his shadows as he ate and slept day by day. He should've known…

Nothing was given for free... There was always a catch. If so? Then why him? Why had the fate of misery chosen him? What did he do? What did he f*cking do?

"Moulin… "

Moulin flinched. It was a rare unusual reaction from him. Somehow, fear had suddenly overwhelmed his heart that he broke his calm facade in front of everyone.

Emlen's hand halted in the air, refusing to lower down and touch his little brother's shoulder to ease him, to console him. He stood there witnessing the unconcealed fear in Moulin's eyes. There were no tears… just unbearable sorrow and immense fear…

Emlen's grey eyes constricted.

Moulin quickly looked away the moment he realized the expression he had worn.

No weakness… there shouldn't be weakness… He was strong, he had persevered, and he had come this far… he wasn't going to give up this easily. He couldn't be helpless, in this situation he had to harden his heart and face everything head-on...

His shoulders tremble slightly before they relaxed. His eyebrows withdrew calmly as he took in a soft breath. Thick eyelashes fluttered open, silver irises gazed at the man before him.

Moulin opened his mouth and began to speak…