2 Chapter 2: Her frightened eyes

Anne arrived at Green Gables both angry at herself and at a certain young man, she had simply told him that she had been heartbroken. But that meant nothing more? It wasn't a confession, was it?

In truth, she didn't know what to think, the ideas that the fortune-teller had put in her head, were revealed to be completely false. Gilbert was not the right fish? No, this metaphor meant nothing to her.

And above all, what importance could all this have, if the latter loved someone else? Love? What meaning could this word have, and what if love was a completely random thing? This girl, or woman, had come out of nowhere, and supposing Gilbert had been courting her for weeks or even months. But how could she know, since he hadn't even bothered to tell anyone, not even her.

Yet she thought after all these years they had become friends. But apparently he didn't even consider her in that way, otherwise she wouldn't have discovered the existence of this lovely young woman at the same time as all the residents of Avonlea. Wasn't that the most hurtful thing in the end?

Still lost in thought and upset by what had just happened, she continued her walk to the porch of the house, when she was alerted by sniffles and sobs. She turned her head to see where the noise was coming from, none other than Jerry, who was sitting on the floor in the barn with his head down and his face between his hands. Anne momentarily forgot her problems and went to meet him.

"Je-Jerry?! What's wrong?!", she asked worriedly.

The latter did not answer, he simply raised his head and looked at Anne, his eyes filled with tears. The young redheaded girl then understood what was the cause of the sorrow of the young farmer, Diana.

She had been on the outs with her friend since the day before, and apparently for Jerry his relationship with the young brunette had also broken down.

She then sat down next to the young boy and put her hand on his, "I'm so sorry Jerry, it seems that at Green Gables we are all cursed with love stories. First Marilla, Matthew, and then you... and me. But I'm sure you'll be able to break that curse."

Jerry looked up at the girl, "I loved Diana, I loved her very much.", he said, his voice still cluttered with tears.

She looked him in the eyes, "I know.", she replied with a faint smile.

"If it makes you feel better, a fortune-teller told me a story about fish, and apparently I wouldn't have found the right fish, you think it's a ridiculous metaphor too, don't you?", she laughs at her own anecdote, as if she was trying to put a smile back on the dark-haired boy's face.

Jerry still manages to smirk slightly and disapproved, "Not as much as to consult a fortune-teller."

"Don't laugh at me! I had big personal dilemmas, and I was mostly... foolish. But today I realise I wasn't the only one with dilemmas that day. I feel sorry for you Jerry."

"So you and... a boy?", he asked her, teasing her, while his eyes were still a bit red from crying.

"I feel stupid talking about my problems when you... but... I-I just sort of confessed something to this boy, while he is courting a young debutante, I feel so miserable. I know my problem is ridiculous compared to yours."

Jerry wiped his eyes with the sleeves of his shirt and stood up, "Gilbert, huh?"

"Ho-how do you...?!!"

"Since the county fair, everyone in Avonlea knows about it, and even me, in case you forgot, I was there. I had seen him."

Anne closed her eyes, trying to convince herself that the thing that had just happened hadn't happened, Jerry was now not going to miss a single opportunity to remind her of it.

Then the young farmer added, "But you know, even though you're a strange girl I think he..."

"No. There is no way.", she says firmly, interrupting the young man.

"And what did you confess anyway?"

"That ... I was heartbroken when I saw him with Winifred at the fair ... I can't believe I said that. If only he hadn't insisted, oh no... I would never have admitted such a thing!"

"He forced you to say that?"

"Ego, no doubt, he wanted to know if I was jealous, envious, or use any other adjective! What a nerve he had... And he even said he would like the idea that I was!!"

Jerry frowned, "The ego?", presumably confused by her story, "So Gilbert insists to know if you are jealous of this girl, and he tells you he wishes you felt that way? He wanted your attention, classic.", He concludes confidently.

The young redhead was staring into the void, as if she was realizing something.

The dark-haired boy tried to make her react, "So?"

She blinked, pulled herself together, got up off the ground, and walked out of the barn, " Th-Thank you Jerry.", she walked towards the house, still looking lost.

Jerry scratched his head and giggled slightly, at least the girl's stories had cheered him up a bit.

At nightfall, Anne was now in her room, settled on her bed, lying on her back, her eyes glued to the ceiling, she had tried to study for tomorrow's exams, but it was in vain, she couldn't concentrate fully, how could she? She had just realised that Gilbert had also confessed something in his own way.

In the moment she had been so worried about the young man's reaction, especially that he felt sorry for her. That she hadn't even noticed this detail. He wanted to make her jealous...? At least that's not how he really said it.

She suddenly thought back to the evening at Miss Stacy's, when they were all still so happy to have accomplished something. She was alone on the porch and Gilbert had joined her to congratulate her, but was it only that? She had just said the first thing that came into her mind that day, "Winifred...is a lucky gal." She just felt herself falling into his eyes, she had to stop doing that thing now, she couldn't do it anymore, Gilbert was not for her, he was for another girl. But all the same, he had to remember this completely harmless sentence, she wasn't even sure what it meant when she said it, because she had pronounced it so naturally.

As she could no longer discern her fantasies from reality, it was no longer easy to determine. She felt as if she had been wrong so many times, her daydreams really played tricks on her sometimes. But it was so painful at the fair, she didn't want to delude herself any more, despite what Jerry had brought to light, no, she wasn't convinced yet. She still couldn't convince herself that the dark-haired boy could feel that way about her. She really didn't want to have her heart broken again.

The next morning, Gilbert went to the kitchen, smelling the smell coming from it, he was impatient to taste the cooking of Hazel, Bash's mother, who had arrived the day before in Avonlea to take care of little Delphine.

He was ready to take his exams and had put on his best suit. Hazel had been particularly attentive to the young man, and he was even embarrassed by all this attention.

Sebastian arrived with Delphine in his arms and walked towards the latter, "Is Uncle Gilby looking his smartest for his big exam today, baby bunny?", while the little girl touched his face, "Oh, hi. Good morning Delly.", said Gilbert with a touching voice.

Hazel was visibly disturbed by the scene, she instantly scolded Bash, after which the mother and son went into the next room to argue, while Gilbert was enjoying his breakfast.

Hazel then returned to the kitchen and asked Gilbert, "So what are your favourites Mr. Blythe, I'd like to make you a good meal for tonight?"

"Gilbert, really is fine.", he insisted for the tenth time since he had met Sebastian's mother, "Bash, don't tell you, but tonight I'm not having dinner here, I'll be in Charlottetown.", Hazel nodded politely.

Despite the discussion he had yesterday with Anne, Gilbert had to honour his presence at the Rose family's invitation. His night had been particularly difficult, of course the exams had preoccupied him, but above all he had thought about his relationship with Winifred, how others perceived it, and how Winifred could perceive it, the expectations she might have, as well as the expectations of her parents. Above all, an important detail had now come into play, Anne. How could he continue to see Winifred after Anne's confession?

Admittedly, Anne had left angry and upset yesterday, but she had confessed that she had been heartbroken by his fault, because of his relationship with Winifred. Now he had to make things right.

That same morning, Anne and her classmates were all gathered in front of the church which was used as an examination place, the school having unfortunately burnt down. Most of the students were all anxious about taking their exams, with Moody at the head, he was breathing into a paper bag, he was speaking at full speed.

"I am dying! I-I can't breathe! My heart is beating too fast! What if it's about to explodes?! Why isn't Gilbert here?!"

Besides, Anne didn't know it either, why wasn't Gilbert there? It wasn't like him to be late, perhaps he had decided to take his exams elsewhere to simply avoid her. She thought it was cowardly, but for the moment there were more important things at stake, the exams.

The young redhead was sitting on the porch and was continuing her revisions, or at least she was trying to, despite the hubbub around her, when suddenly she heard everyone exclaim, "Diana !"

Indeed, the young brunette had finally decided to take her exams behind her parents' backs. So they were all surprised to see her, Anne first, she even stood up to look in the direction of her old friend, but she stayed in her place. While the other girls all gathered in front of Diana and questioned her.

After the examiner had arrived, the adolescents calmly entered the facility and settled down at their tables. While the examiner was handing out the tests and explaining the examination process, Anne was panicked when she couldn't find her pen. Suddenly she thought about Gilbert, as if it wasn't enough that he had taken her pride the day before, he had to steal her pen as well! Even though of course she knew he wasn't that kind of guy, he must have just forgotten.

Luckily the examiner was able to lend her a pencil, and she was able to pass her exams without any problem.

A few hours later, the exams were over, all the students left the school and headed heckling to their place of festivities, the ruins.

Once at the ruins, Anne began to shout, "We did it!", and with these words they all threw their headgear in the air, "Graduation!", she exclaimed again.

They danced and continued to shout for joy when one of the Pauls brandished a bottle of alcohol, and to everyone's surprise, Diana was the first to take a big sip. It was going to be a truly festive evening.

In Charlottetown, Gilbert had just taken his exams, like his other classmates, he had been anxious, but he had done his best, he thought. He was now on his way to the Rose family home, where an even more perilous task lay ahead of him.

The young man was expected by Winifred at her home, normally he was also expected to have dinner with her parents, but how could he? Not after his conversation with Anne. He already felt terribly embarrassed to be there on the porch of the Roses's house.

Winifred came to welcome him after a few minutes, as usual, she was very well dressed and smiling. Gilbert then entered the house and followed her into the living room.

Winifred's parents in turn came into the living room to greet the suitor.

"Oh, hello Mr. and Mrs. Rose, I am sorry to ask you this in your own home, but could I speak to your daughter alone?", The dark-haired boy was really embarrassed, he also had a serious look on his face, which did not go unnoticed by both the parents and the pretty blonde.

When they were alone, Gilbert sat down on the couch next to Winifred, took a deep sigh and began to talk, "In fact, if I came, it wasn't to have dinner with your parents. I came to tell you ... that my thoughts were keenly turned to someone else."

The young blonde couldn't believe her ears, "You... Are you making fun of me?"

He was surprised by her reaction but continued his explanation, "I had introduced her to you at the.."

She closed her eyes and interrupted him in a dry tone, "Anne."

Again surprised, he didn't expect her to guess on her own, "I-I'm really sorry to tell you like this, but I guess there was no good way to do this."

"You know what I find most distressing? It's that I thought I was imagining things. Just a family friend and a classmate, huh? I was so naive.", she was starting to get carried away.

Gilbert didn't know where to put himself, he just dreamed of digging a hole and hiding in it.

"So you love her, right?! And thinking about my father was going to..."

The young man didn't really want to talk about his feelings when he was confused himself, he was content to keep silent. But he was sure of one thing, his feelings for Anne were not the same as those of Winifred.

"Oh, and I imagine that now she must be quite happy to have won. If this is a childhood promise or a whim, I would find it highly regrettable. But it's your choice after all. So we won't see each other anymore? This is what you wanted to tell me?", she asked on the verge of boiling.

"I want you to know that I appreciated your friendship, and I could appreciate it again if ... »

"I hope you're kidding. And you also want to send me an invitation for your future wedding?"

Gilbert lowered his eyes to the ground, his embarrassment became greater and greater.

The young blonde got up from the couch, still as bitter as ever, "I guess she's already set a date? When will the happy event be?"

"I...I didn't actually talk to her." he replied with some trepidation.

"Well, thank you at least for coming to talk to me about it before, I can recognize this regard.", she replied abruptly, then she left the room to keep her dignity, "I think you know the way out.", Her eyes were bright, but she hadn't shed any tears.

Gilbert hurried out, and politely greeted Mr. and Mrs. Rose, and they instantly understood in his eyes what had just happened.

A few hours later, the young man was back in Avonlea, the sun had barely set. Hazel was the first surprise at his return.

"Mr. Blythe, we won't wait for you until nightfall! If I had known I would have cooked something for you! Can I cook you something to eat?"

"No, no, thank you, I'll just eat a piece of bread or some porridge."

" No way! After your exams, you must be starving!", she exclaimed stubbornly, and began to cook.

Suddenly Sebastian appeared in the kitchen, "Then Mr. Blythe is already back. Did her parents finally kick you out?", he said, teasing him.

Gilbert sat down around the table, "In fact... I threw myself out."

Bash raised his eyebrows, he suddenly seemed very attentive, he sat down in front of him, "Can I know more?"

"I spoke with Anne yesterday, as it were, I asked her how she felt."

"What did she feel? About you?"

He replied painfully, there was remorse in his voice, "She told me that I had... broken her heart... during the county fair, when I was with Winifred."

Then Sebastian got up and walked over to Gilbert, slapped him on the head, "Ouch!" said the young brown.

Immediately, Hazel reacted by shouting at him, "Have you lost your mind?!"

"I was reminding him a sweet memory, I would have liked she slapped him again with a slate."

The latter disapproved, and then served a plate of scrambled eggs to the young man, "Bon appétit Mr. Blythe, I wish you a good evening.", She left the room with these words.

"I wish you the same, and please call me Gilbert.", He repeated this for the fifth time that day, and then he began to eat.

Bash always looked at him so upset, "So you're just eating your eggs, and that's the end of your story? You continue to see Winifred after that?"

"I-I don't think I'll see Winifred again... after I confess to her that I was thinking of someone else... There's nothing else to tell."

"Of course it is! We have to talk about the fact that I win! You and Anne, I knew it! Since the day you received her letter on the ship!", he exclaimed, starting a dance.

But Gilbert interrupted him very quickly, "It's more complicated than that."

"Why?", he stopped dancing.

"She was really angry with me yesterday...and more importantly, I don't even know if what she feels is still true today."

"Your problem is you think too much, you have to act Blythe.", he said with a wink to the latter.

Night had definitely fallen to the ruins, the teenagers were still playing games, and especially spinning a bottle of rum, they were all already drunk, including Anne. She had drunk like the others, and as she was not used to it either, she soon began to speak loudly and make a kind of performance.

"Follow me, my sweethearts and friends!", said the young redhead, imitating the voice of a pirate and climbing onto an old small boat that was lying on the ground, "Avast, ye school mateys! Why does it take a pirate so long to learn the alphabet?"

"Why?", asked her comrades in unison.

"Because he spends years at C!", she replied, which made everyone laugh, she continued, "What's the difference between a hungry pirate and a drunken pirate?"

"Tell us!", they exclaimed again.

"One has a rumbling tummy, and the other's a tumbling rummy!", she replied, her joke provoked the same reaction. Then, as if caught in the moment, she began to laugh and whirl.

At the same time, her classmates left to play other games, and revealed Gilbert, who had been hiding behind the others for several minutes, the latter had attended the young redhead's performance not without a certain amusement.

When she had started dancing, she hadn't even noticed that someone was watching her. She was so exhilarated that she didn't really pay attention to her surroundings.

But yet Gilbert was there, his eyes staring at her, he had difficulty believing what he was seeing, he had the feeling that he was observing a creature, like a forest nymph dancing in front of the flames, her red hair flying in the air, creating an impression of being incandescent. The thing he was looking at must have been unreal since he seemed to be the only one to notice her, or the others must have been mad not to even realise it. He savoured those seconds just gazing at her, while she couldn't see him, feeling his breath being taken away.

Then suddenly she saw him, he was there, that way of looking at her, that she had felt so many times, it seemed so unreal to her.

So she stopped dancing, as the alcohol she had drunk hadn't evaporated, and the dance she had just performed didn't help her balance, she almost stumbled when she saw him.

Gilbert rushed towards her and offered his hand to help her, but she simply ignored him and preferred to get out of the boat she was perched in by herself.

What had he been going to do with the ruins? With the alcohol she had drunk, she had even forgotten that the young man was supposed to be there tonight. Then she thought, considering the serious expression on his face, he certainly wasn't here to have fun. He stared at her, looking confused, and that's how she feared the worst.

He approached her and said, "Could we talk please?"

The young redhead didn't know what to say, she wasn't really in any condition to have a serious conversation. All the more because even when she was sober, she had already committed the worst awkwardness with Gilbert. But in spite of everything, mechanically she nodded, at that point of the night she would have approved of almost about everything.

The young brown boy walked towards the bonfire and sat down on a tree trunk, waiting for her to do the same. Meanwhile, she tidied her hair a little, to make herself look good, and smoothed her dress a little, because she must have seemed like a real savage, as Marilla might have said. With some hesitation, however, she went towards him and sat down beside him.

At first Gilbert had a nervous little smile, and then he began to speak hesitantly, "Er... I hope your exams went well. I didn't tell you, but I took mine in Charlottetown."

Instantly, at the only mention of Charlottetown, she couldn't help thinking he had taken his exams there, not only to avoid her, but to visit Winifred.

"I had noticed." she said, trying to hide her disappointment as best she could.

"I thought very much about what you told me yesterday, and I..."

She immediately interrupted him, and being afraid to hear more, she stood up.

"No, no, Gilbert. You can't tell me that now. I was having fun, I was celebrating our exams, I-I was a pirate! And I-I don't want to... It was so embarrassing! I really wish you and Winifred every happiness!", she reluctantly ended up saying.

The young man was more confused than ever, why were they able to talk simply, when it was about their studies, their ambitions, their values, or even just joking? Why was it so difficult to talk about their feelings? Were they even capable of it?

When Gilbert was answering, the girls' group rushed to Anne, which included Ruby, Josie, Jane and Tillie.

"Anne! We have to do our ritual! We can't do it without you! Please come on!", they exclaimed, chuckling, not even paying attention to the dark-haired boy.

In front of him, they pulled the redhead's arm to make her move and form a circle, but Anne still had her eyes on Gilbert, her eyes were filled with sadness, at that moment she thought he was going to break her heart again.

As for the young man, he recalled Bash's advice, that he was not doing enough with Anne and that he was thinking too much. At that moment there were perhaps both of them thinking too much. Then seeing all the uncertainty that the red-headed girl had in her eyes, he got up, walked towards her, and simply took her hand and carried her away with him without saying a word. Anne didn't contest and let Gilbert guide her. Feeling his hand in that way had been so comforting, it paralysed her and it was probably for this reason that she followed him without complaint.

She didn't know what he was planning to do, but he seemed determined to have that conversation he had started earlier.

The two young people left the group of girls totally flabbergasted. Ruby's mouth was open, she couldn't believe it, then she looked at the other girls with a stunned expression and started giggling, "Oh my God!", the other girls imitated her. For sure, they would have a new topic for discussion tonight.