1 Chapter 1: Her eyes full of pain

The students in the study group were all crammed into Miss Stacy's home, to her dismay.

You could hear Anne and Gilbert talking in the other room, while the teacher served her students a lemonade, you could see Ruby making eyes at Moody sitting at the kitchen table together.

Anne expressed all her frustration, "It's so... Infuriating! Poor Miss Stacy, Poor all of us. Now we're all crammed in here, cramming, because of their heinous actions."

Gilbert was also wound up, but he showed it much more calmly, "I wonder if Mrs. Lynde will actually hold them accountable."

The young redhead replied sarcastically, "Well, if anybody can...", then proudly enough, she added, "I have to say it was exhilarating seeing the change in Mrs. Lynde."

The two friends looked at each other while talking, Anne had a book on her, sitting comfortably next to Gilbert. As for the latter, he was holding a book in his hand and trying to study.

The dark-haired boy chuckled, following his friend's comment, "I bet."

Then, he pointed to the girl's pen, which she herself had already used to write, "Can I borrow your pen?"

She gave him her pen. Then while looking at the young man she said, "We took a stand and accomplished something, despite the repercussions. Hm."

Gilbert laid eyes on Anne as he spoke, while Anne's eyes were once again riveted on her book, "Maybe because of them. The school's burned down, it's awful..."

Miss Stacy grunted on hearing the conversation, "Do not get me started.", and then left the room with a pitcher of lemonade in her hand.

While the brown boy continued his reasoning, "But it's strange. It makes me feel like the world is moveable."

Anne replied, "No matter where life takes me, i now know i must be a relentless thorn in the side of those who refuse to amend the status quo."

He looked at the young redhead with raised eyebrows, "Of course you must.", then with a convinced look on his face he declared, "And I know what I must not be. A country doctor, limited to delivering death sentences. There so much that we don't yet know. I believe we can fix people, save them."

Their eyes met, dreaming, he said, "We just haven't figured out how. I would give anything to be there when we do.", he concludes with a smile.

Anne asked innocently, "Are you going to the Sorbonne?"

Gilbert looked at her out of the corner of his eye, "May as well ask if I can fly.", This made Anne giggle, then confidently he added, "Someday. Someday I will."

A little later, when the two studious students had their noses in their books, Jane arrived with Ruby, and addressed Anne, "Tell her to focus, Anne! The exams are tomorrow, and all she can do is turn geometric shapes into hearts.", she laughed jokingly.

Gilbert, for his part, sighed and lowered his head on his book when he heard these trifles. While Moody, Ruby's object of distraction, laughed at the other end of the room with Charlie.

Ruby protested to the young redhead, "Who says that being romantic is any less respectable than being studious? Ask Gilbert.", Anne glanced at this one. The young blonde continued, "He's the most studious and he's romantic."

At these words, Gilbert raised his head, frowned, and then lowered his head back to his book, trying as best he could to concentrate on his revisions.

This made Anne, who seemed rather embarrassed, giggled, "Well, we're not being romantic. There's nowhere else.."

The young blonde looked up to heaven, "Not with you, Anne, with Winifred."

On being heard of this name, the dark-haired boy sighed slightly embarrassed.

Josie and Tillie then jumped at the opportunity to question the young man, "How'd you meet her anyway?", "How long have you been courting?"

As for Anne, she stared at the pages of her manual, at the mention of Winifred. While Gilbert was curious to perceive her reaction, could it be that she was feeling jealousy at that moment? The young man had been disturbed by the phrase the redhead had said the day before, when they were both sitting on the porch of Miss Stacy's house, "Winifred... is a lucky gal."

This lasted only two seconds, but when the young man had his eyes on her, she raised her head slightly and crossed his eyes for a short moment. This moment had been very brief, but enough to make Gilbert understand something. Her blue eyes were filled with a certain sadness, he had felt it, like that day at the county fair, it couldn't have been a coincidence.

At the same time, Moody said in a mischievous tone, "He was squiring her folks around at the fair. It must be serious."

Ruby couldn't help noticing something with the smile, "It has to be, with a girl so beautiful. Isn't she, Anne?", she innocently asked the only girl in the house who was not to be asked about it.

Gilbert, who always had his eyes on Anne, waiting for another sign, he stared at her discreetly, but not so much that the young redhead didn't notice it, she turned her head towards the young man, and answered Ruby, "So... beautiful", once again her eyes revealed such pain, she had taken on as neutral a tone as she could, but her gaze did not deceive him.

Cutting off this brief but intense exchange of glances, Tillie asked the dark-haired boy, "When will you see her again?"

Gilbert didn't know what to answer at the time, he understood then that he had to cut short this conversation, it made him uncomfortable, much more than he would have thought, was it because Anne was at his side, and she was hearing all about this discussion? He realised that all this had gone too far, he could no longer impose this on her. What if Anne had feelings for him? This seemed unthinkable months ago, but today, and for some days now, a doubt had entered his mind.

The young man then replied the most evasive in the world, "Er... I don't know, at the moment I'm concentrating on the exams."

The redhead turned her head towards Gilbert again, she could see that the latter seemed embarrassed by all these private matters, she was of course devastated to witness this, she definitely did not want to know anything more about this relationship, in order to preserve her spirit and prevent herself from imagining painful scenes, such as Gilbert courting Winifred, Gilbert holding her arm, Gilbert having dinner with his future in-laws. Far too many images had already invaded her mind, and God knows that her imagination did not need this to imagine the worst. But there was another part of her, well hidden, that took just a little pleasure in seeing the dark-haired boy in such embarrassment, she thought that he should have thought twice before strutting around the county fair in full view of everyone on the lady's arm, he had reaped only what he had sown.

Moody said with a smile, "Anyway, tomorrow we all have an appointment at the ruins after the exams."

Ruby was also excited at the idea, "It's a secret!"

At the same moment Anne was again immersed in her book, or at least she was trying to, while Gilbert raised his head towards attentive Moody.

Moody teased the young brown, "You should come. And bring your fiancée..."

The other students all started to giggle, and some girls made outraged noises.

And of course, Anne remained quite silent, she raised her head slightly to look at the reactions of the group, then she realised that Gilbert had laid eyes on her, so naturally she laid eyes on him as well. His gaze was both soft and intense, she could not interpret. Had he finally understood what she was feeling? Did he feel pity for her when he understood this? What a humiliating thing it would be if he did, she thought.

When she heard the others sniggering and joking to Gilbert, she felt as if she was being made fun of.

A little later, the revisions had finished, everyone had left Miss Stacy's house, Anne was heading alone into the woods to Green Gables, when she heard someone calling her.

"Anne! Wait!", exclaimed Gilbert. She hadn't been dreaming, it was him who was calling her, but why? Did he want to brag or, worse still, take pity on her?

She stopped in the middle of the path and waited for it out of sheer politeness, for the heart was no longer there at that moment.

"Can I walk a little with you? I'd like us to talk.", He asked in a rather serious tone.

Anne just nodded her head, again out of pure politeness, she accepted. But very quickly she forgot the thoughts that assailed her.

"So, I guess you're going to keep studying when you get home?", asked Gilbert, with a smile on his face.

"Miss Stacy advised us not to overload our heads with too much information the day before, and above all to give it a rest."

"So you're finally going to rest?"

"No, you're right, I'll probably study again.", She laughed back, which made the young man laugh too.

The two friends continued to walk in the woods, despite the smiles on their faces, and the little moment of relaxation that the two young people had experienced, they each faced reality in their own way.

This time it was Anne who broke the ice, "So... What did you want to talk to me about?", Normally this would be an innocent question, as they used to talk about all sorts of topics, but this time she was worried about the answer.

Gilbert inspired, for him too, the moment was frightening, he had no idea how to approach the subject, and the young redhead ask him, but it was the moment, he had to know, he had to hear it from her mouth.

"I... I wanted...", The young man definitely did not know how to approach the topic, and even by asking himself, he was unable to know what he really wanted, how he could define it in a simple sentence.

Then he simply said, "You're also going to the ruins tomorrow?", he frowned and blinked, realizing the totally futile question he had just asked.

Anne was not expecting this question, why was he asking this? Besides, why even a subject like celebrating the end of the exams could interest Gilbert Blythe, he was probably going to celebrate with Winifred, among adults, she thought.

"Well, I suppose so.", she replied banally, and this answer did not help the young man at all in to move towards the subject he wanted to discuss.

"You didn't ask me, but I guess I'll go too.", he finally said.

She nodded her head, with a certain apprehension in her eyes, she could already see Gilbert arriving at Winifred's arm at the ruins. But on the other hand, she couldn't imagine her in such an environment, she seemed too serious for that.

The dark-haired boy saw this thing in the eyes of the young girl, whom he had seen earlier at Miss Stacy's house.

"But I'll come alone." he says, as if to set the record straight.

"Well...", she replied simply by nodding her head, she was relieved to hear that, there won't be a Winifred on the horizon tomorrow evening, finally tomorrow's day would be less worse than expected.

Gilbert inspired deeply, and took his courage in both hands to ask a question, "Do you really think... that Winifred is a lucky girl?"

Anne felt attacked when she heard this question coming out of the young man's mouth, how could he dare to make fun of her like that? Just to bring up an embarrassing moment from the day before, which she wanted to stop at all costs.

"Well, at least she's luckier than me.", She said, realizing the double meaning of the sentence, so she tried to make up for it awkwardly, "Well...I-I mean, she seems to have a comfortable life with loving parents."

The young brown frowned, he was confused by this answer, "But...you have Marilla and Matthew."

"You're right, I don't really know why I said that.", not knowing how to justify herself.

The two young people finally came out of the woods and arrived near the Lake of shining waters. She knew that Gilbert lived on the other side of the lake and that they were going to have to separate there. But the young man didn't seem to change direction, he continued on his way with the young redhead, and yet she would have liked him to do so, feeling terribly embarrassed.

"So... don't you think she's lucky for some other reason?", he insisted, not being satisfied with the answer he had just received.

Anne began to feel vexed by the young man's insistence, she stopped in her walk, "What - what are you trying to make me say exactly?"

Gilbert then turned to her, and gave her a look full of innuendo, his forehead wrinkled, and his eyes filled with both gentleness and fear, he apprehended terribly the consequences of this conversation.

Seeing the latter's unequivocal gaze, she could no longer be mistaken, he wanted to know, to know what she thought of him.

She then continued, giving the impression of scolding the dark-haired boy, "You want to hear me say she is lucky to be in your company, that you are... courting her. Of course she's lucky, you're an honest boy, you don't have to doubt that. Oh and of course, I wish you both a wonderful...life.", Her voice broke on this last word.

They resumed their walk, and continued along the lake, Gilbert was slightly backwards, his eyes turned towards the ground, he let go as if in a breath, "Anne, this is the second time you've said that to me, and I don't know... I have the impression that you don't mean it."

The young redhead felt trapped at that moment, so she tried in vain to get out, "I-I thought so."

"So... It's true, It doesn't upset you?", he asked in a depressed tone, "Don't get me wrong, it wasn't my intention. But... today I would like it to matter to you a little."

Anne understood at that moment, that it was no longer just a question of what she thought of him, but also what did he think of her deep down?

They arrived at the entrance to the haunted wood, Gilbert still didn't seem to change his course. The redhead remained silent for a long time, not knowing what to answer, she seemed to be searching for her words. But the dark-haired boy had gone too far to stop talking.

"Anne, if you tell me sincerely... that you don't mind seeing me with someone else at all. I'll leave you alone.", The words were out, there were no more doubts, she had to understand what he was getting at.

Anne stopped at the edge of the haunted wood and looked Gilbert in the eye, her eyes wide open and full of fear, "I ... I have to go.", she walked on her own into the woods.

But the young man, determined to get his answer, stayed back and cried out, "Please don't run away from me again! You've always done that!"

The young redheaded girl took a deep breath and turned to him, "How dare you ask me that! If I tell you that I literally felt... my heart... break, the second I saw you with her, what will you do now?! I'll tell you, you'll do the same thing as before, except now you'll know. And I feel so... stupid for feeling that way that day, I was so stupid... and naive! But oh I know! Again, it's my overflowing imagination, I read too many books, and I thought that these things could happen in real life too. How could I have believed during the dance... that you... when in fact you...", she interrupted herself, thinking that she had definitely said too much, she thought he had got the answer he wanted, but the consequence of that was that she felt even more miserable, she didn't even understand how she felt, she just knew that she had been broken a few days ago.

He recognised there, the Anne he had known for years, saying all the things that went through her mind, without thinking for a single second, what she said often made no sense to him, more than once he had been confused, but this time he had understood her. Then he began to approach her, staring into her eyes, almost begging.

But the redhead held out a hand in front of herself as if to stop him, "I'm going home alone now. So, go-good luck with the exams.", she said clumsily.

Gilbert felt like holding her back again, but unfortunately he couldn't do anything without having a guilty conscience, so he simply decided to take the road to his house as well, "Good luck to you too.", he wished Anne with a slightly broken voice.

On the way home, Anne was devastated, she had just opened her heart to Gilbert, of course when she did, she seemed rather to have shouted at him, but the situation demanded it, and it seemed almost unreal, how dare he ask that, when he was courting an another girl, did he at least realise it?

As for Gilbert, he hadn't come back home immediately, he had decided to sit down for a moment by the lake, he had had doubts before, but his hopes had been broken many times.

He couldn't believe it, Anne finally cared about him, she was jealous? Of course, the way she had said it still haunted him, she had felt her heart breaking. He felt awful that he was the cause of this, he wasn't aware of it of course. It was the first time in his life that he had been with a girl, how was he supposed to know everything about it? Bash had joked with him about the possibility that Winifred had expectations of marriage, although the idea had never crossed his mind before. Of course she was good company, she was funny and smart, she was also charming, open-minded, which was the most important quality for him. But... Anne.

She had been a part of his life for years now, there were ups and downs in their relationship, they could apparently endure many storms, but she was always there, like a beacon in the night, guiding him, supporting him.

For sure they had become friends over time, at least today he wasn't sure, things couldn't go back to the way they were before. In reality, he was trying to repress a certain satisfaction. He would never want to break her heart, it was the last thing he wanted. But there was a sensation from his stomach at the thought that she might have feelings for him.

Then, still tugging, he thought of Winifred, and how unfair it was to betray her by thinking of somebody else, but it wasn't just any other girl, it was Anne.

He took a deep breath and got up off the floor, he had to do something, but for the moment, he had to concentrate on tomorrow's exam.