16 Living your dream Vs Living your fetish

After breakfast in bed, we head down to the spa to meet Bingqing and Shan. They're smiling, chatty. If they heard us screaming in our room all night long, they don't let on.

They greet us with hugs and then Bingqing hooks her arm through mine and points to the spa features. "Looks like the massage rooms are separated by gender," she explains, "And there's a free facial package we should probably take advantage of too. We can meet the boys afterward in the steam room and sauna, those are connected for both men and women. You fine with me kidnapping your wife for a bit, Robin?" she calls over her shoulder, probably because he's been trailing us from the moment we walked away, his gaze fixed on me.

I flash him a grin as he chuckles. "Just keep in mind, I'm a jealous husband," he tells Bingqing with a wink.

"I promise to bring her back in one piece," Bingqing calls.

Then we duck into the massage room.

Unbeknownst to me, apparently Robin booked ahead for all four of us. At any rate, the spa attendants seem to recognize us at once and they lead us into a joint room, where they have us lie face down on tables and oil up our backs.

It is quite possibly the best massage I've ever had—and a desperately needed one after last night's marathon workout love making session. Every muscle in my body feels sore, in ways I never knew were possible. So it feels fantastic to have them knead out the knots now, even if it keeps making me groan in pain.

"Worked out recently?" Bingqing asks, with a knowing smirk.

"Something like that," I admit, my cheeks flushed bright red as I think about how much noise we made last night. Not to mention what we did in the hot tub.

I wonder if Bingqing and Shan noticed us, from where they were on the dance floor.

"I'm sure." She laughs. "So tell me, is Robin as great in bed as he looks like he'd be?"

My cheeks flush even worse than before.

"Er, well… I mean…"

"Because damn, that man is attractive as hell," she adds with an almost wistful sigh.

Something unpleasant curls in my stomach for a moment. He's not mine, I tell myself. I can't act jealous if I'm not even really his wife. Still.

"That is why I married him, after all," I say a little testily. Then I catch myself. "One of the reasons, I mean. Also for his brain. And his personality. And, well…"

Bingqing laughs, sounding lighthearted. "Relax, Chunhua, I'm only teasing. Besides, I think you're smoking hot too, y'know."

She reaches over to nudge my shoulder with one hand, and my face, if anything, blushes worse than ever.

"Thanks. You're hot too," I add, because it seems like the polite thing to say, and because, well, she is. She and Shan both are. "You guys make a gorgeous couple."

"Thanks." Bingqing sighs happily. "Is it crazy that I'm actually looking forward to being married?"

I glance over and catch her studying her engagement ring with a contended smile. I find myself watching her more closely, feeling a fresh bloom of jealousy now for an entirely different reason.

"Of course not. I think that makes perfect sense. You found the right guy to settle down with, and now you're going to be with him for the rest of your lives. Why wouldn't that be something to look forward to?"

"You just hear so many people talking about settling down as… well, settling. As putting on the old ball and chain and never having any more fun. I don't think it's going to be like that for us. Shan and I are still going to have fun, and neither of us are settling for each other."

"Of course not," I agree. "It's not settling if you're both head over heels in love." I catch myself looking at my own ring too, turning it this way and that to enjoy the way the diamond catches the lights in here, reflecting them back in dozens of multicolored sparkles that dance along the walls.

When the masseuse nudges me to turn over for the facial, I roll onto my back and rest both hands on my stomach, my right one over my left, toying with the ring absently as I think about how nice that must be. To feel certain about your partner. To know you are marrying for the right reasons, and the right person. To know exactly how you both feel, and to be certain you are on the same page about it.

Yes, I am jealous of Bingqing, but not because she thinks Robin is hot. It's because she's got a normal engagement, leading up to a real marriage, and me? I just have this weekend. I am being the victim of my "fetish for billionaires". I just have a couple days of playing pretend, and then it'll be back to the real world.

"Hey." Bingqing's hand brushes my shoulder again. "You okay?"

I glance over at her, and then do I realize that a tear escaped my eye and tracked its way down my cheek. I wipe it away, feeling more embarrassed than ever, my face white hot now.

"Yeah, fine," I mumble, my voice thick and unconvincing. "Just, um… something in my eye. Lotion or oil or something."

Her hand drops away, and she lies back on her spa bed, closing her eyes. If she doesn't believe me, at least she's nice enough not to call me out on it. I shut my eyes too, and try to relax back into the spa treatment, instead of letting my brain run in circles worrying what's going to happen when this weekend ends.