Chapter Eleven

Kendra decided to forget her past and start afresh. It really wasn't easy because of the sacrifices she had to make again. She decided not to rely completely on her dad's words, for fear of being disappointed. She believed her dad can do something but she needed to do work aswell. She tried not to have any resentful feeling towards her parents because it wasn't helping her or anyone. She understood they feel frustrated and shameful, not being able to take care of her. She forgot everything bad that had happened to her in the past and focused on her business but it wasn't working. The business stopped progressing like it used to; people stopped patronizing her like before and it began to affect her profit. She knew why this was so; she wasn't doing her work with the same spirit and vigour. The few days she didn't go to the market and encountered alot, made her spirit down and uninterested in anything. She decided to device a different method and put more efforts. She started waking up earlier than usual and even changed her recipe. Her new change yielded no progress. It troubled her greatly because she couldn't save when there is nothing to save. She was actually losing. Since punctuality and a different recipe didn't work, she decided to change location. The competition among foodsellers was one of her problems. She started looking for a space on Sunday evenings; when people are out and she can see the person in charge and negotiate with him. She told her dad to speak to the person on the amount of money to pay monthly for the space. She knew that if her dad speaks to the person himself, there will be a fair agreement. They came to an agreement on the amount she would pay monthly and Kendra was ready to start selling in a different location. The place wasn't very close to her house but she was ok with it since she wouldn't have to compete with anyone.

"Christmas? Christmas is not my priority for now. I don't have enough money for important things not to talk of unimportant things." She said to Betty her new neighbour.

"Christmas is not unimportant..."

"I know. What I mean is that I have more important things to spend my money on. Buying Christmas stuffs like new clothes and shoes can come later. I have grown past that stage after all."

They were talking about how they plan to celebrate Christma for the year.

"I have plans of traveling for Christmas this year. I miss my family alot." Betty said.

"By the way what is this important thing you have in mind that is stopping you from spoiling yourself? I'm sure you are making enough profit." Betty asked her. She noticed Kendra was beginning to have alot of customers.

"I need to further my education." She replied and decided to stop there. She didn't want to talk much about her dreams or family issues. She just want to work more and talk less.

The way her family celebrated the Christmas surprised her. She never thought they would buy new clothes and drinks for the celebration.

"Why waste money buying new clothes when we can manage the old clothes we have on Christmas day? Our priority in this family is to ensure we have atleast the basic human needs and to also stop borrowing money from people. Not buying irrelevant things. Or maybe my dad is really ready to pay all the bills this year. I hope so." Kendra kept her thoughts to herself. She didn't want it seem as though she was disrespectful and not thankful.

"Adamma don't you like your dress?" Her mum asked when she noticed her sad mood.

"I like it." She quickly replied with a fake smile.

"But you didn't say thank you." Kendra felt embarrassed on hearing it. She muttered the word with a quiet tone.

She later stopped being anxious and enjoyed the celebration with others. She wasn't the only one struggling to make it after all. They had no visitor and she had no one to visit. So she decided to go outside the house and chat with her neighbours, atleast those she associates with. Her brothers went out to visit their friends, while her parents remained indoors, probably chatting and gossiping as usual.

The jamb form for the year was finally out. Kendra rushed and purchased hers. She focused more on her studies and it bagan to affect her business. She noticed it but didn't stop; she was determined to go back to school no matter what sacrifice it would cost her. She spent just morning and afternoon selling. In the evening she goes back home to study. One fateful evening when she returned from work, she saw her neighbours clustering around someone. She went to them to know what was happening. It was one of her neighbour's daughter who just came back from school and was now showing off beautiful pictures of herself, friends and the school building.

"I like the colours of the building, they are very attractive." One of them said and the others agreed.

"It is not. I prefer that of my school to this one." She scoffed at the pictures. They suddenly became quiet on hearing her and turned to see who the statement was coming from.

"Can you imagine?! Somebody who has not even seen the gate of a university talk more of gaining common admission is here vomiting rubbish! Better go and do something that will greatly help your life." The owner of the pictures told her bluntly.

Kendra's chest suddenly felt hot on hearing the girl's words. It stirred her anger and she opened her mouth to insult the girl back. She was afraid that if she doesn't fight back, she will be seen as a wimp by others.

"Atleast I'm not a useless criminal. I go out everyday to make my own money." She tried to look intimidating.

The girl's control snapped and she angrily rushed at Kendra. The other girls tried their best to separate them.

Tony who was the only one at home, had to force Kendra into the house to stop her from fighting with the girl. She finally stopped yelling and exchanging words after she has entered inside the house.

"My money!" The thought suddenly hit her. She searched her purse and bag thoroughly.

"I can't find the money I came back with." She shouted when she couldn't find it. She immediately stood up to go out insearch of it but Tony stopped her.

"I will search for it myself." He insisted and left the house. He didn't trust Kendra to go out and search for her money without causing trouble again. He searched every corner of their house and neighbours' for her money. After searching for a long time without finding the money, he went back inside, thinking of how he will tell her about it. He suddenly didn't see her when he entered inside. Before he could think of anything else, he started hearing some people yelling at themselves. He rushed outside and saw Kendra exchanging words with the girl she had fought with and her mum.

"God what is wrong with this girl?!" He rushed to her to stop her.

"I'm sure she was the one that stole my money!" Kendra insisted, trying to free herself from her brother.

"What even took me there in the first place? I've lost a huge sum of money because of my foolishness."

"Kendra it was just one thousand five naira." Tony said to her but immediately shut his mouth when she gave him a hard glare. One thousand five hundred was a huge amount for her. After thinking of everything that has happened, she went to bed without eating her dinner; she was too sad to eat.

The next day, she went on with her business and tried not to think of what happened the previous day. Luckily for her, Betty was naturally funny and fearless and her jokes made Kendra forget her sadness. While they were still chatting, a woman approached Kendra to buy some food.

"Younglady you look familiar. Are you not Loveth's secondary school classmates?"

"Which Loveth?" Kendra wanted to ask, but ended up saying, "yes I am." She almost asked the woman how she was in a different state before she remembered it was actually where they live.

"Remind me what your name is?"

"Kendra."

"Yes Kendra!"

"Just classmate? Is that the kind of relationship she thinks I have with her daughter? I thought Loveth takes me as a friend." She thought with a disappointed look.

"Is this what you choose to do with your life?" The woman asked with disbelief.

"How did I forget that this is who Loveth inherited her revolting attitude from?"

"Excuse me?" She tried to be polite. As much as she was emotionally hurt yesterday, she learnt a lesson from what happened.

"Your mates are in the school, learning to be useful to themselves and the society, but you are here selling food. Is this the kind of life you choose to have? Looks like my daughter Loveth was right about you."

"Are you here to buy food or not?" Kendra asked without trying to be polite anymore.

"No she is not here to buy food. She is here to show us she is too blind to see that a teenager is trying to make some money for her education. It is people like you that make life difficult for responsible youths. I'm sure that daughter of yours is doing nothing in school because she has a mother like you." Betty came in. She hated to see Kendra being molested by people. Kendra was surprise; she thought Betty's braveness was limited to her age mates.

"I can see the two of you don't have respect." She said to them angrily. Some adults had to rush to them stop the arguments.

"Looks like I'm cursed. Yesterday I quarrelled with one of my neighbours. Today someone who is supposed to encourage me to keep struggling is the one that is trying to pull me down." She said, trying to calm down.

"I need to go home now." She said and suddenly began to park her things.

"Why so early? You haven't even sold much."

"I have things to take care of and they can't wait." While she was still speaking to Betty, a car stopped in front of them, the door window was wined down and the person on the passenger's seat ordered for two plates of food. She quickly packaged it for them before going to the car to give them and collect her money. The person driving the car paid her told her to keep the change with a smile. But that wasn't the thing that shocked her. It was how familiar he looked. She was so lost that she forgot to thank him.

"Are you ok?" Betty asked when she saw her looking confused.

"The guy.....I know him but I can't remember where I saw him." She said, thinking deep to remember.

"If you want to remember, then you must relax...."

"I remember now!.....I mean no. It is not him." She immediately lied because the last thing she wanted to narrate to anyone was how she got to know Iyke.

"See you tomorrow Betty."

"Till tomorrow." Betty replied.

"But he smiled at me. It was a sincere one, like he wasn't trying to mock me. But I don't think he recognized me." She thought on her way home. She remembered the deal he offered her and she immediately pushed it to the back of her mind.

"I would rather remain single for the rest of my life than marry someone in exchange for money. I don't want to sacrifice one happiness for another, it is not what I want. As much as I want to further my education, I also want to get married for love not because of financial assistance."

The day for her exam finally came and she gave it her all. She couldn't tell which one was more difficult, that of last year or the present year. Months later she went back to the school to write her post Utme as required. The result she saw after the post Utme made her doubt if she would be given admission; her score was too low. She immediately began to think of what to do if she doesn't gain admission. She was greatly determined to start school. Wisdom who was done with his external exams, was made to wait till the next year inorder to reduce the burden. Her parents were surpportive the little way they could. Kendra knew it was too much for them so she decided not to always approach them for money. She approached some of the students in the school and asked them of the required fees to be paid. She knew information like this will be sent soon but to only students who gained the admission. When it was time to start checking caps, she checked hers and even waited but she wasn't admitted. She wasn't surprised, she saw it coming.

Months past and she had Just one week left to do something about her admission. She knew she could resume lectures without paying but she couldn't. She couldn't go to school without buying all the things she would need and most importantly, printing the needed documents that cost alot of money. Her condition made her frustrated and feeling sick but she refused to accept the fact until the day she found it difficult to get up from bed. She had to stay back at home and receive treatment. She would have forced herself up and go to the market if her parents haven't insisted on her staying at home until she was strong enough. She gave up the idea of insisting to continue her business, it wasn't even helping. She thought of borrowing but then remembered there was no one to borrow from. She felt guilty remembering she haven't told her master about what happened to the money he gave her. Her sickness took longer than she expected and before she knew it, it was the students' Matriculation day. Her parents did everything they could to help her. They couldn't ask her to wait till the next year, it will break her. Her dad decided to meet the school authority to plead for help on her behalf but he knew it was a waste of time. Weeks after the Matriculation, she began to recover slowly. She decided to go outside and get some fresh air one evening. Minutes later she heard someone yelling and she stopped what she was doing to hear better.

"Dear God, why not give me this golden opportunity that this girl doesn't want and give mine to her since it is what she wants." She soliloquised when she heard a woman scolding her daughter for refusing to go back to school.

"I just don't know why I have this kind of people as neighbours."

She ignored them and continued the calculations she was doing. She was calculating the list of items she would need in school and the fees that must be paid. Kendra had decided to go to school and start receiving lectures and working to earn something, but after seeing how it will be impossible to buy her needs and also pay her fees, she killed the idea. Her parents had gone to her uncle's and aunts but it was the same disappointing answer; they were trying to survive too.

"Looks like the poverty runs in the blood." She spat the word without caring if it was unthoughtful of her to do so. She picked up her phone and went through the contacts on it, looking for nothing in particular. Just then something caught her attention and she quickly scrolled down to the number. Kendra spent alot of time debating if she should dial the number or not.

"Nay. I've got values too." She thought and wanted to press the off button but ended up dialing the number. It began to ring but she made no effort to stop it, instead she watched it and waited for what will happen next. The moment he picked the call and spoke, Kendra's heart skipped a beat and she suddenly felt too weak to speak. She brought the phone closer and opened her mouth to speak.