4 Four

The following day was just like any other, Amberly had a refreshing shower to awaken her from the groggy feeling overcoming her from the disturbed night's sleep she had. She dressed in her uniform, adorned her ID badge around her neck and packed her bag. She decided she needed a more substantial breakfast this morning; to avoid any unsettling low sugar spells and migraines like she'd had recently at work, so she opted for a deep bowl of thick warm porridge topped with fresh blueberries and a large steaming mug of her favourite tea. Once her stomach was full and she was content that she had everything she needed, she headed out to work and locked the door behind her.

She delved into her tasks at work to help keep her mind occupied and distracted from the never-ending questions and quizzical experiences she had swirling around inside her head. It had worked for the most part, she had been very effective at work today and had managed to achieve a great deal today, by pushing herself so hard. All carried on as normal throughout the morning with nothing troubling occurring, however this was short lived as after lunch she started with her migraines again.

As she walked from each individual enclosure to another, inspecting the enrichment and the animal's behaviours, she absentmindedly chatted to the animals discussing random events as if talking to herself. As she reached the Meercat enclosure she started to hear the standard chittering and mumbling of sorts, but when she looks towards the adult meerkats she hears snippets of "eat", "hungry" and "stop", that is followed shortly after by a sharp pain in her temples and her head beginning to feel fuzzy again. She assumed she was getting another migraine and put, what she thought she heard from the meerkats, down to her imagination and the headache making her hear things. This was later supported when she glanced over the enclosure again, but this time hearing nothing but the normal squeaks and yips coming from the meerkat pups in the enclosure. Soon the headache wore off, she started thinking more clearly and brushed off the unusual events as nothing more than that, simply unusual events that had occurred due to her migraine, and nothing more.

As the day goes by she becomes very melancholy, her mind wandering elsewhere and her soul calling into the distance to some far-off place, somewhere she knows would connect her with her sister's own. She fills with such a dark loneliness, that she is having difficulty keeping at bay today; a longing and grief for the loss of one so close to her, who understood her unlike any other, her soul's other half. She finally finishes her long day with relief and a need to be alone. When she arrives at home she isolates herself to spend some quiet time alone to think things over. She looks through old childhood photos and listens to emotional music, missing her sister deeply and unable to hold the tears at bay any longer. Why did you have to go? Why did you leave me? I need you here. I need one of your hugs. If I could, then I would go wherever you will go. If I knew the last time that I held you was the last time, then I never would've let go. She silently muses to herself, sincerely hoping that wherever Hope is now that she can hear her and feel Amberly's love for her.

That night, as her tired and puffy bloodshot eyes closed, and she drifted into an exhausted sleep, with salty tears drying on her face, she was not as alone in her bedroom as she'd initially thought. Whilst in the middle state of in between unconscious sleep and conscious wakefulness, she saw a figure of a young girl stood off to the side of her room near her bed. Thinking it all just a dream, and feeling no threat coming from the figure in her room, she simply let the events unfold whilst watching them do so. The figure of the young girl came closer to Amberly, where she could now see her face and features in the darkness of the bedroom. But she was astonished to see the deep loving and innocent eyes, mischievous smile and unruly eyebrows, that she knew so well. Hope. She was there, right in front of her, within touching distance. But when she had materialised before her, she looks as though not a day had passed by since she had died. She appeared before her as just the same 12-year-old naïve young girl, with long her long wavy brown hair, with a mind of its own, and wearing her favourite jeans and hoodie, as she was before.

She gazed down upon Amberly as she climbed into bed with her, she curled up on top of the duvet and snuggled into the crook of her side and bent legs. Amberly could even feel the weight and pressure of Hope leaning against her on the bed before she drifted to sleep. That night was the best and most peaceful sleep she had managed to have in years since her sister's death.

The previous night was left in the back of her mind the following day, she wrote it off as either a very vivid and realistic dream or just her overactive imagination triggered by her grief. But deep down she knew it was far more than that, but she didn't have the courage to address or acknowledge any of that. It was easier, and a far more 'normal' reaction in her opinion, to plainly ignore it ever occurred and attempt to move on and forward instead.