3 To Be By His Side

Afterwards? Fantasies of other world transmigration or rebirth? There was none, because I did not die. I lived as a courtesy of him. Apparently he awoke not long after he passed out, but wasn't able to move. He understood I gave my life for him, hence he valued mine. I was saved, and I was happy for he was saved.

After recuperation, this time he allowed me to be by his side. Everyday, I wait for him to come home. I would set the bath for him, and I would prepare his food for him. I would make sure the house is clean so he doesn't have to worry about becoming dirty. I also made his bed so he could have a good night's sleep when he sleeps in the same house as I do. Is this the fairy tale of the ugly duckling becoming a swan for the prince? To me, it was, but to others like the one that took my identity, it was simply another servant hired through gratitude.

That's right, I'm a simple housekeeper for Ye Nan Ke. Although I would perform all the chores for him, I was not the only one. Setting the bath, I was in charge of bringing the clean towels. Preparing his food, I was in charge of watching the stove. Cleaning, I would clean until my back breaks, but I still can't do better than the other young maids. Making the bed, I was only allowed to bring the clean sheets. I couldn't even take a step into his bedroom. I'm the fitting example of being hired for the gratitude of saving his life. If there's one reason that I had not been expelled for being so incompetent, it's because of my voice. Through the nutrition provided to me as a servant, I was able to nourish my malnourished body, and my hoarse throat healed allowing me to once again have my sing-song voice. Although my figure still disgust others, my voice was pleasant to the ear and along with the life saving gratitude, it was enough to offset the granny looking face I had, allowing me to meet the requirements to stay. Although I was the topic of gossip and target for venting, I endured because I know anything is worth it as long as I could stay by his side.

Staying by his side as a housekeeper was the happiest days of my life. Everyday I would wake up and dress in a decent servant's cloth. Then, I would perform my daily servant duties. Although I did not know much at the beginning, I was eventually able to adapt as I continued to watch the others perform their duties. Although the other maids did not like me, they did not make life harder on me when they were in a good mood. So, they did not stop me from learning from them, especially when I asked in a sincere attitude.

After five years of serving in the household, with the continuous, extra effort I invested in hopes of serving young master Ye better, I was able to become a master of household chores. Not only that, through five years of constant nourishment, my wrinkly skin has finally faded away, turning me from an old granny into a middle aged women. It was a gradual change that mostly went unnoticed, but I can feel that everyone treated me much better as my physical appearance gradually got better. It might have been subconscious judgement, or maybe it's just because they got used to me, but either way I was happy.

The happiest part of all for not just me, but all of us maids was when young master Ye comes home once in a while. We would bustle about to meet all his requests, and he would glance over once in a while, causing our hearts to flutter; however, we all know that our fantasies were but fantasies for our we would not want to dirty young master Ye's status. Plus, young master Ye has a better alternative by his side, his fiance "Xiang He Ai". Every time young master Ye comes back, he would bring her back, and all the other maids would enviously stare at her. As for me, at the start, I had to try my best to hide my wrath for I still could not fight her, although my status was much closer now, albeit still a servant; however, eventually I could only bow my head, for many reasons.

One reason is my physical appearance. If you were to wonder if my beauty would surpass her and that I would snatch her spot as phoenix one day, unfortunately, that will not happen. Even though my skin healed and I was beautified, but no matter how much the skin repairs itself, there is a limit. Once my face returned to normal, my face stayed normal. Gone was the face of a soft jade-like skin beauty. Instead it was replaced by a plain face that looks like it's been worn out from overwork. My hair grew back, but it was not as silky and luxurious as before, more on the rough, dry side. Honestly, I should be glad that it was even able to be healed at all, but every time I looked at "Xiang He Ai", I could not help but wish that I looked better, unfortunately my face stayed plain after it healed two years ago.

As for the second reason, I cannot forgive myself if I were to break his heart. As I stayed by his side longer, I began to notice how much he cared for her. Not only his care shown in public, but also all the secret actions he takes in order to protect her. I know this because I was the person that he conveys a lot of his troubles to. Yes, basically I became his advisor. Apparently, he valued me a lot when he figured out my scheme that I used to save his life, so he would always come to me when he has a work related problem that he can't solve. At first I was so delighted that my mind would go blank as I knew he recognizes me. I knew I cannot destroy his hope, so I would rack my brains for nights without sleep in order to provide a solution. Coming for one problem, then the next, eventually, he began to open up to me about other problems, such as problems dealing with his fiance. My mind was no longer blank as it was clouded by negative thoughts. I knew it was my big chance to sabotage his relationship with her, but no matter how much I wanted to, I could not bring myself to when I saw his face full of love for her as he talked about her. I knew at that point that this life, he doesn't belong to me. I also knew that for any of his life, I could not bring myself to harm him in any way. Hence, that bubbly feeling that brewed long ago was locked away by me for a duration that I believed to be eternity. Except, the future did not want to agree with me, and the future had to provide an alternative solution to my problem that turned my tale into one that is not so blank.