2 Spread.

" Why would you let a friggin peanut butter upset us both?! "

" That is just not the issue and you know that! "

" No. That's it, you just magnify things a hundred and one percent and that is sick!"

" You don't understand me, do you? "

" Good Lord, aren't you frustrating??!! "

" I am not, you are!!!! "

" Okay, i will drive to the grocery store now and buy you some frigging peanut butter so we could have peace. "

" No thanks, i don't want one any more!! "

And i stormed back to our room, locked the door and let out an exasperated sigh.

I laid down in bed and just looked at the ceiling. I felt tired. I felt exasperated. Everything feels useless. Like nothing is fixable. Did i make a mistake? Did i really ignore the signs of this failing relationship?

Peanut butter.

How could a simple peanut butter bring out the worst in both of us? Back in the days when we were young, when love was new, our favorite hobby was watching series of Kdramas and knocking down bottles of peanut butter. Because we love the taste of peanut butter so much, we even made a shirt that says peanut butter lovers. It was so silly, yet we were so happy. We'd wear that stupid shirt going out, and people would give us looks sometimes because we looked like idiots. But its okay, because we are each others idiot. We'd even tell our friends that someday, we will make a Peanut butter society. Then they'd laugh at us for being so pathetic.

Then there was a time that we ran out of peanut butter on our first year of living together.

" Please buy peanut butter on your way home?? "

" Darling i can't, you know the nearest convenient store is 4 miles away from us. Can the peanut butter wait until tomorrow? "

" Okay, but you know there's no spread that i could eat aside from peanut butter. "

" No. Tomorrow, I'm really tired. I'm hanging up okay, i love you. "

I fell asleep while waiting for him to come home that night, but when i woke up to get some water in the fridge there was already a peanut butter inside. I remember walking back to our room and looking at the face of this man, then back to the peanut butter and feeling extremely happy.

Then now.

How could a simple object that once brought you joy bring you pain as well?

knock. knock.

" Hey, come out, i made a tuna spread. If you're hungry, i left it on the table. You can eat it, or throw it, or whatever. I'm heading to my mom's. "

I heard the front door closed, an engine starting and he was gone.

Its 10 pm and he's heading to his mom's.

A heavy warm tear rolled down my cheek.

This was not the way it was before.

But this is our reality now.

Whatever happened between the 7 years was still partly a mystery. A mystery i have no clue if i sti wanted to solve.