You Are All Rednecks

In the business of treasure hunting, the so-called "dollar storage units" were the ones that no one seemed to find an interest in.

It seemed to be a free unit, but no treasure hunter was that stupid. Despite nearly guaranteeing a 100 percent chance of profit, the fact remained that it still had no worth.

The end result for one dollar units was that anyone who bid for them ended up working as a cleaning man for the company; in most cases, those units became a joke.

However, this time, Li Du was willing to clear the items. While he didn't know the true value of those stamps, spending a dollar was still worth the bet.

He gave a signal to Hans, who then raised his hands, announcing, "Me!"

"Very well. This man is willing to bid a dollar—is anyone willing to raise the bid to five dollars?" the auctioneer announced.

Even though they had said that Hans wouldn't be able to take a single thing away, the overly proud locals still shook their heads. Though they had vowed that earlier, at the end of the day, they were still only after the Segway.

While the remaining people seemed to hesitate, a voice suddenly appeared in the crowd. "For this unit? That's only something that the poorest and stupidest b*stard would do!"

As this statement was said really fast, most treasure hunters were unable to find the person that said it.

However, no one seemed to want to bid for it any further.

The auctioneer pointed toward Hans, saying, "Very well, this gentleman has won unit 58. Let's move on to unit 60."

After placing the lock on the door, Hans turned toward Li Du and whispered, "Very nice going there."

Of course, the person who said that earlier statement was Li Du. He had covered his mouth with his hands as he said that, it was really well hidden.

"How did you know it was me?" Li Du asked in a shocked tone.

"Your English pronunciation is quite unique," Hans laughed. "I can place it without any trouble."

"Sh*t, that's discrimination!"

"Okay, then my accent is even worse—it's like the bark of a dog."

While the two joked, the later storage units were all sold as well. As they had already been marked by the others, every time they bid for something, the locals would always increase the price.

The bidding came to unit 75; the last storage unit that was worth anything. If they couldn't get this one, then their trip this time would have been worth nothing.

"We will get this one," Hans vowed through clenched teeth.

"How should we fight against the crowd?" Li Du asked. "There are quite a number of valuable items in here, but how about we set the maximum price at 1,000?"

In spite of this, the price soon got out of their control. Starting at 500, they were only able to bid once before the price reached 2,000.

"Sh*t, when did the people here become so wealthy?" Hans asked with a puzzled expression.

However, the price was still increasing, and soon it crossed the 2,500 dollar mark.

Seeing this, Li Du only shook his head before stating, "Let's give this one up. These guys must have insider information and know what's in here."

After the bid crossed the 3,000 mark, the attendants started to back out. Finally, the second-to-last person to bid waved his hands and said, "Alright, I'll leave the rubber boat for you; let's see how much you can sell it for."

As expected, just like the previous two auctions that they attended, the locals all knew of the news of the rubber boat.

The person who won the auction this time was the buffy black man who had tried to start trouble with them in the beginning. After locking the doors to the warehouse, he gave them the middle finger and yelled, "Outsiders, don't even think about profiting here!"

"At least we won't be making a loss, idiot," Hans spat.

There was only one more storage unit left; it was full of household and electronic garbage that was quite worthless.

Finally, the auction ended, with the two of them only getting unit 58.

Although Hans had presented a really positive attitude earlier, no one was more annoyed than he was: "We came here with thousands of dollars—how could we only have spent a dollar?"

"We spent a lot more than that: gas, the hotel, and food probably cost around three to four hundred dollars."

"Oh my God. Weren't you supposed to be protected and blessed by God? Hannah really believed in the wrong person—you aren't even kind enough to help this brother!"

As Li Du began cleaning up the books, he scoffed, "How did you drag Hannah into this? If God knows of your fooling around, then he's probably punishing you."

"This is definitely a form of punishment," moaned Hans.

Every book he picked up seemed to be thrown away a second later; "Hegel's Philosophy, Reflections on the Andes Mountains... sh*t, does this guy want to become Aristotle?"

Other than a bunch of books on philosophy, the only other thing of note were history books that were, predictably, worth nothing more than waste paper.

As a crowd gathered outside, and the garbage pile seemed to get higher, a bunch of laughter started to spread.

"Hey country bumpkin, let met give you a lesson: another name for a dollar storage is the beggar storage."

"Your luck is still quite good. You are able to carry some stuff home—unfortunately, it's only a pile of trash."

"Thanks for helping us clear out garbage, yellow bast*rd. Idiot!"

"Trying to profit from our lands? You are crazy to think that! Go back to picking from the garbage instead."

Amidst this, Li Du crushed a few pieces of cat food, and silently stuck them within the cracks of the bookcase.

The hungry Ah Meow immediately seem to become agitated before climbing onto the bookcase, desperately trying to claw at the cracks.

With this done, Li Du then said, "Hey, my cutie, what are you doing?"

His early reaction prevented Hans from detecting any trace of cat food.

Pretending to have discovered the stamps, he shouted in a shocked tone, "Hey, Big Fox, come here—there's stuff here."

When Hans came over, his eyes seem to shine even brighter than those of Ah Meow. "Sh*t, these are stamps! Quickly, take them out!"

The cracks were very thin, so they were unable to stick their hands into them. They had to use the back of a hardcover book instead.

There were a total of six stamps including those showing Jordan, Ali, and Lewis; the other three people played baseball, football, and hockey, and he recognized none of them.

Although a few people saw the stamps, the others in the crowd still continued to mock them.

"Yo, did you guys find some treasure?"

"My God, your cat is a genius, how did it find those golden stamps?"

"That's really quite amusing. Ha! it must be the stench of these stamps that attracted that cat…"

Li Du didn't know the value of the stamps, so he looked at Hans with an inquisitive gaze.

As Hans carefully held the stamps in his hand, his smile became more radiant the longer he looked at them.

After finishing examining the last one, he looked toward the crowd and laughed, "What did I say? What did I say? You guys are Rednecks! Rednecks! But we are not, we are blessed by God, and we are bound to become rich!"