New World

I wanna cry...

I wanna cry! 

Just how exactly did I ended up in the novel I used to read? And as the ill-fated princess at that! This is the worst, somehow I just want to go back in my own world and get yelled at by my trash of a family. But, well...living here as a princess is not bad at all. I get to eat everything and do what I want without getting scolded by anyone. They're just tolerating whatever I do.

Alina Devi de Ciera. Originally, her name should have been Alina Devi Hecate, because she's not a Ciera in the first place. Alina is a daughter of the Empress of Ciera Empire, but her father is a King in the Kingdom of Hecate. Because of that reason, her father and brothers hated her ever since they knew about her existence.

On the other hand, the second Princess who's a year older than Alina became their very favorite person. Not only loved by her family, but by the whole nation. She's portrayed as kind, nice, brave, and compassionate person, and is also the protagonist of the story. The only one who actually loved Alina genuinely despite all her brothers' protests to just leave her alone. Alina was a character who eventually died and was forgotten, she was only there to make the protagonist look better. I mean, Alina is absolutely stunning and beautiful, but she was only created to become the protagonist's spotlight, the one who makes her stand out. 

She died at the age of 15, after committing suicide. I actually liked her because of the same life that we lived. We're both hated by our family and was never loved by any of them. However, for Alina...she had Themis, Ande, Ryna, and the other maids, plus Amara. As for me...I really had no one at all. The reason she killed herself was because of her family as well. She couldn't take it anymore, the way she was treated by her Father and brothers that she ended up killing herself. Her family weren't even bothered by it and just let it go, so Amara had to suffer and carry the guilt alone, that's where she became even more closer to her male lead.

Even Alina who have people by her side ended up committing suicide because of her family. 

We really have the same fate, huh?

And now I've become that very Alina Devi de Ciera. 

"Princess, are you alright? You've been sighing since we arrived here," I took a deep breath and looked at Themis with a smile. Themis is a great person who takes care of me gently. 

"I'm fine, Themis, it's just...I'm hungry, can I have something to eat?" I asked. I'm not hungry, that was just an excuse. 

"Absolutely, Your Highness, will you wait for me here as I get your afternoon snacks?" I nod my head at her and giggled. She stood up and walk towards the door of my room, she even bowed to me again before closing the door. 

Two days ago...

"Alina Devi de Ciera. The First and only Princess of the Ciera Empire," I blinked for a couple of times as I tilt my head. Wow, that name is so strangely familiar...

Alina Devi...de Ciera?

Hmm, wait, wait a freaking dang minute. What was the name again?!

Alina Devi de Ciera?! What's with that name! It's exactly the same as the hated Princess in that novel book I used to read! What the heck is this coincidence?! Wait...no, no, no. 

What...what is this...? Suddenly, memories started flashing in my head, there's a lot of it that my head starts to hurt again!

"Gughh..." I held my head as the memories of the past rushes back into my head. It hurts as hell that I might start crying! 

What are these...? Me falling into a lake, and a blonde...haired boy helping me? I can remember his words clearly, but I can't even remember his voice. Who was that?

Everything fell into darkness after I saw that boy's face trying to reach for my hand as I drown in the river. And after that...it ends. I clearly remember the ache on my chest as I try to fling my arms and save myself. It was thanks to that kid...

Alina Devi de Ciera...

Themis, Ande, Ryna...these names, I remember now. And this guy they're calling Your Holiness. He is the High Priest in the Ciera Cathedral, Kiernan Chilton, the Youngest High Priest in the history! But, this is not good, not good. They all have the same name as the characters in that book I used to read. It was displayed alone in one of the bookshelves in a bookstore, it caught my attention and ended up buying the book. It was a good book, you can feel a roller coaster of emotions. It's strange how no one even purchased it. It wasn't that famous either, because I've never seen any posts or talks about it in social media.

"Hmm, thank you for reminding me, Themis...I remember now," I spoke, right after the pain in my head subsided. Themis looked at me and smiled at me gently. 

"Mr. Holiness, have you been looking after me? Thank you! I'm sorry to worry everyone..." I pouted and clenched my hands on the blanket that's covering half my body. 

I need to get my act together or they'll get suspicious of me. But, I'm nervous. Nevertheless, I really can't do anything about it now. I hope this is just a dream but...I'm not stupid to not realize this isn't reality.

I need to...I need to stay strong, if I want to keep living. 

I shook my head. I don't understand everything. I mean, how did I ended up here? How did I became the person who is only living inside a book? I'm pretty sure this isn't getting reincarnated because she's already five years old. I'm only transported here, my very soul is. If that's the case, where is the soul of this Alina? How did I ended up in her body? Did our body switched? Wait, what the heck that's going to be a pain in the ass for me in my real world! She's literally five years old! 

Ah, dang it. This is getting out of hand. 

But, should I really think about it? As of now, I'm inside a book, aren't I? Goodness gracious. I really need to plan my escape now, otherwise I'll end up with a depression because of my family and just ends up killing myself as well. Still, it depends on me should I kill myself or not. 

"Your Highness, I'm back. Should we go to the garden and have a picnic?" Themis came back, bearing a picnic basket and there's a picnic blanket hanging on her left arm. 

"Picnic?" I asked. That's right, it's been 20 days since I last got out, and that was when I drowned. Two days ago was when I woke up here as Alina Devi de Ciera, and I'm slowly getting used to it. 

"That's right, but before that..." she rummaged on the picnic basket and pulled out a glass bottle of...milk?

"Please drink this," then she started walking towards me. I stood up and put all the toys onto this luxurious box beside me. 

"Princess. Ande and Ryna will take care of cleaning everything, so please don't worry about it," I blinked for a couple of times before slowly nodding my head. I stared at the toys on the floor again before turning my head back to Themis. Is it really alright? Won't they talk behind my back if I left these toys here on the ground?

"Here, Princess, please drink this milk," I nod my head and reached for the glass bottle on her hand. She already opened it, so I didn't need to. 

I chugged on the milk and handed the bottle back to Themis. This milk is so sweet and delicious, I really love it. 

Ahh, suddenly my eyes are itchy...

I yawned and rubbed my eyes. I noticed Themis kneeling in front of me as she stare directly into me, then smiled again. 

"Shall we go now, Princess?" She asked. I nod my head at her as I force a smile. Until now, I still have no idea how I should act with these people here, but I'm acting based on memory. However, Alina is a stubborn child who's been throwing tantrums to see her family...and I need to change that, completely. The maids here probably noticed now that their Princess' behavior has changed, of course they would notice it...

This little girl always asks for her family's presence every time she wakes up!

Hah...that alone is enough to make me sigh in disbelief. 

We started walking towards the door of my room, and when we got out, there's a dozens of maids waiting for us outside. Wow, they are all looking at me as if they want to throw themselves at me. Those smiles...I just know it's real.

"Good morning, everyone, have you been waiting for us?" I asked, and they nodded right away. 

"Yes, Princess. We've been worried ever since you were unconscious," Ande replied. Ande is a sweet lady who has a mousy hair color, with light brown eyes. For these past two days, I figured out that this lady is the easiest to pull using this kid's cuteness. 

"Hehe ~ I'm sorry for worrying you, I'll make sure not to do it again! I'll become a well-behaved Princess now!" Yes, act. Just act. You can do it, Clara. 

"That's good to hear, Princess..." Ryna said. Based on my memory, besides Themis, Ryna and Ande are the maids that Alina favors. Maybe because they are the ones in charged with the task of playing with the Princess. 

Themis and I started walking as the maids behind us follows. 

Even though I love the attention, it's sometimes suffocating. But, the real Alina loved it when there are lots of maids following her, all because she feels really superior about it. Seriously? This Alina here is so different from the Alina I know in that novel, even though they have the exact same name. 

That's why I've decided. Last night, I made plans on how I would be able to live my life here until I die of old age. Since the reason why Alina died is because of her family, I figured out that...I just have to stay away from them. That's right, I shouldn't see any of them, nor find them. They are going to be the reason of my demise! So, I have to enjoy living here with the people who are surrounding me and to be contented with what I have. And of course, my plan has steps. First step of my plan A is to fix my attitude, while maintaining the good ones, since Alina still have her immaturity at this age. I have to stay immature while playing nice to everyone. Second plan is to make these people realize that I've changed, so they can adore me even more. After that, I'll make sure to stay inside the house and don't wander too far from the Palace I live in. That's it, and to live happily ever after! I don't need to look for a man, I need to live. 

Of course, I've also got back up plans, in case I end up meeting my family...and that is to...

Plan B is to just ignore them and to live my life staying strong. Since I already know what is going to happen anyway and what insults they will throw at me, I can retort back...with politeness and calm demeanor. 

Plan C...is to just do my best to live with them around. 

Hah...

"Princess, are you really alright? You've been sighing...taking deep breaths since earlier. Are you experiencing out of breath perhaps? I will call for the High Priest immediately," Themis genuinely cares for Alina that sighing continuously worries her right away. Somehow...this make me feel really happy, even though this is not my real body. 

I'm still worried about the soul of this kid though...

"Ohh...Themis, I'm tired walking..." I spoke. I need to act like a 'child' here who is only five years old! And that is not easy! I held her hand and look at her using this child's trump card. Which is her adorable face!

"Is that so, Princess? Haha, I will carry you, Ryna, can you hold these?" Themis asked the lime-haired lady. Ryna nod her head and get the picnic basket and blanket from her. After that, I spread my arms and Themis bend her body to carry me. When she did, I quickly wrap my arms around her shoulders and lean my chin on my arm. 

"Themis, are you not mad at me?" I asked as I close my eyes. I actually just want to start a conversation so I won't fall asleep. 

Being embraced gently by Themis, it makes me want to sleep within her arms. The first time she carried me, I almost cry...all because her arms felt so warm and gentle, things I've never received from my previous family. And those are also things that Alina never got from hers as well. Lucky her though, she got all these maids that loved her...

But she still ended up killing herself. 

"No, Princess. Why would I get mad at Your Highness? I have no reason to, nor the guts to be mad at the Princess," she answered. I buried my face on my arm as I prevent myself from crying. Her voice is so soft, gentle, and kind. I'm so jealous of Alina that she's got Themis and the others with her, and soon...I'll meet my older sister who became the family's favorite but still loves me as her younger sister. 

Lucky, this little kid. If only she was a bit more stronger, her life...could have been really peaceful and happy. But well...she longed for the affection and love of a family, so of course she would want that, and it will affect her greatly to the point that she ends up killing herself. Even me...had to jump off from that building because of everything that happened to me with my family...

"Are you feeling drowsy, Princess? Should we just go back to the palace and rest?" Themis asked. I pulled away form Themis and smiled at her. 

"Nooo, I want to visit the garden again," I replied with a cheery voice. I am just preventing myself to tear up right now because of the way these maids show their kindness and care for me. Somehow, I'm so glad that I became her...

I will surely to live your life to the fullest, Alina. I won't let this second chance to go to waste. 

Not just for me, but for Alina as well. 

"Hehe, it looks like our little Princess missed the outside air after sleeping for weeks," Ryna spoke as she line up with Themis, Ande did the same on the other side while the other maids stayed behind us. 

"Yup, I did! Oh, and I also want to spend time with you all, that's why!" I said as I giggle. They chuckled at me while smiling, and I can't help but smile as well. I know a lie when I see one, that's how I was able to live my previous life, away from all those negativity that the people wants to pass onto me. 

And I can clearly tell that these people here truly love and care for Alina genuinely. 

It's real. And I'm so happy to have experience this...

Really, I'm glad to have another chance in life, even as someone else. 

***