[28]

I don't know how long I stayed in that spot on my knees hunched over Lagertha's ashes, but it was long enough I couldn't feel my legs anymore, I just stayed there wallowing in self hatred and anguish, as I feel rough hands comfortingly pick me up under my arm pits and pull me into a hug.

"You did for her and act of love…very few if any could match, my son." I hear Mikael's voice smooth and steady like always.

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT LOVE ? ! ! !" I roar questioningly as I push Mikael away and start senselessly attacking Mikael my punches sloppy, without form I nearly trip over my own feet, but Mikael catches me and bear hugs me tightly to his chest.

I grab his rough leather vest in both hands.

"I know my son, I know…let it all out, my son." Mikael says softly as I pound my fists against his chest.

I get my emotions under control and look at Mikael, who nods to me before separating from the bear hug he had on me.

"She is beside her mother in Valhalla now my son, do not mourn her for she is where we all desire to be in the end." Mikael says to me as he rests his hand on my shoulder.

"Thank you for coming Father." I say softly and can feel Mikael smile sadly.

"I would not have known, if not for your loyal follower…I would have liked to be here to watch her in her last battle in this world." Mikael replies to me softly.

"My apologies Father...I put this together quickly...Lagertha wasn't in her right mind." I say softly the words taste like ash on my tongue.

"This life I chose for all of you is not…pleasant…you warned me that there could be consequences…I wish I knew that one of those consequences would be outliving one of my children." Mikael says his voice soft, almost drifting on the light breeze…I see some of Lagertha's ashes start to get picked up by wind and use telekinesis to collect my wife's ashes.

"Heh, as if life before was any more pleasant…there are still ways for us to die if we so choose…" I reply to Mikael dryly as my moving the ashes revealing my stake, that I pick up from the ground, and see an image of Lagertha's loving smile, as her skin grays and she bursts into flame.

My grip tightens on the stake, the wood creaks under the strength of my grip but doesn't break.

"My son…release that to me." Mikael says in a gentle but firm voice as he pro-offers his hand to me.

"Relax Father, I won't take my own life…I'd never get to be with her again if I did." I reply to Mikael as I open up my black leather hooded trench coat and slid my stake into a pocket.

"My Son!" Mikael says with some steel in his voice.

"Piss off father, you won't even talk to your other children…don't try to stop me from creating an enemy to kill me…in the future." I snap at Mikael and backhand slap his hand away.

"Very well, Vidar…just remember Freya…" Mikael says softly before blurring away.

"FUCK YOU ! ! !" I roar into the sky a fresh wave of rage, self-loathing…and a deep bone aching sadness.

~ — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — ~

I spend the next couple of months drifting listlessly…across the U.S. passing through the bones of New Orleans…bumping into Klaus wearing a blood stained tunic stumbling off of a ship that had run aground.

"Brother!" Nik greets me happily and pulls me into a hug…but I can't help but feel like I'm being hugged by a friendly stranger.

"Nik…where are the others?" I ask Nik while looking around feeling both a bit of relief at not finding Bekah…while also feeling a bit of longing…

"They are sleeping…on the ship…" Klaus mutters and looks almost afraid of me.

'Don't tell me that they're daggered in caskets.' I mentally groan as Klaus starts to lead me to the ship…revealing…finely crafted caskets that look a bit too modern for the day and age.

Walking over to a casket opening it revealing Bekah…who looks so much like Lagertha did when I killed her.

I take a deep breath in through my nose as Klaus rests his hand on my shoulder I turn to face him, and Klaus tried to ram a silver dagger into my heart, I feel my body start to lock up but I siphon the magic from the blade making liquid silver drip down my body onto the floor of the ship.

I tilt my head back and laugh loudly…my laugh coming out half crazed, "YOU NIKLAUS TRY TO KILL ME, YOU…THE WHINY SNIVELING, LITTLE BITCH OF A BASTARD THINK YOU COULD KILL ME !!!" I shout at Nik as I grab him by his throat and lift him off his feet loving the way he struggles for breath as I choke him.

"You don't need to breathe Nik, I know…as I made you what you are." I whisper softly as I plunge my hand into Nik's chest and grip his beating heart.

"You know Nik…you were always my favorite…" I whisper softly to Nik as I plant a kiss against his forehead and each of his cheeks, "I may have loved Bekah, fucked her…but besides Freya who is my literal other half…you were…the sibling I loved the most…" I whisper softly as I start absorbing the vampire spell magic from his body but can tell that there is too much energy for me to truly siphon.

As I stop his heart and drop him to the floor, 'Why…Nik why…did you turn out this way?' I ask in my mind as I look down at Nik and walk back over to Bekah's casket and remove the dagger in her heart and do the same with the rest of my younger siblings...and notice that there isn't a casket for Henrik. 'I never counted Lagertha as a sibling, not even after Mikael's reveal…she was the woman I love…loved.' I mentally add on.

"Brother!" Bekah gasps as she bolts upright.

"Bekah...Nik tried to dagger me...do you know why?" I ask Bekah who throws herself at me and sobs against my chest.

"She told me...I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me." Bekah sobs against my chest.

'How...Bekah has always shown a more pronounced Psychokinetic abilities...but how does she know Lagertha is dead...?' I wonder in my mind as I take a small amount of comfort from Bekah's embrace.