this broke him.

Ryan Heeds felt like a child having a bedtime and someone enforcing it, but he knew why his attending Doctors had told him to be in bed by 9pm and madidate6 for 30 minutes. It often took him 4-6 hours to fall asleep and that was on a good day and often this resulted in him not sleeping at all on most nights. Lately he found himself wide awake for days on end riddled with guilt over his treatment of his wife and son. 

He couldn't help the constant vivid flashbacks of his wife begging him to believe her, telling him she had never cheated on him and asking him to just do a paternity test, but he'd thrown the one Eliza had provided him in her face screaming he'd already done one and calling her out of her name. He went as far as to brag about his infidelity to her, he knew she died heartbroken and there was no way he could seek her forgiveness, guilt washed over him once more.