41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41

With the last case closed and no new calls, Castle decided it was a good day to stay home to write. He was already dressed, though, in case Beckett called with a new case he could use as a procrastination tool. After retrieving the morning's mail, he joined his mother at the breakfast bar where she was having coffee and sorted through the mail as they talked.

Stopping abruptly at one envelope, he said, "I think it's Alexis's decision letter from Stanford University."

"Oh, Kiddo. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. It just makes it so real. She grew up so fast."

As they talked, Alexis came downstairs. "Is that the mail?" she asked hopefully.

"Holding the letter up, Castle answered, "You have one here from a Mr. Stan Ford. Is that anyone you know?"

Alexis excitedly opened the letter and started reading.

When there was no squealing or jumping up and down, Martha prodded, "Well, Darling?'

"I didn't get in."

"What?" Castle asked, sure he had misunderstood.

She mentioned things she had already done. "I had it planned."

"Honey," Castle began.

"I don't want to talk about it right now, Dad," she interrupted brusquely, all the signs of impending tears showing. "Not… Just… Not now. Please." She ran up the stairs and into her room closing the door behind her.

Castle took a breath to call after her as she was about halfway up the stairs, but Martha put a hand on his arm and said, "Let her go, Richard. She needs some time to herself to process it."

"How much time, Mother? This is my little girl. Right now I want to go pick her up and sit her in my lap like I did when she was little and rub her back while she cries, and tell her, 'Daddy's here. It's gonna be okay.'" He sighed deeply and admitted, "But, clearly, that isn't going to work now." He looked absolutely defeated.

"Give her whatever time it takes," Martha answered, rubbing a comforting hand over his back. These things can't be predicted."

Castle's phone rang, and it was Beckett, calling with the address of a crime scene, checking to see if he wanted to come.

"Go," Martha encouraged him. "Seeing Katherine will help you, and I want my little boy to feel better, too. I'll call you when there are signs of life returning from up there." She waved an arm vaguely toward the stairs.

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Text me that address, Kate."

"Is everything okay?" she asked.

"More college trouble. I'll tell you when I get there," Stopping at the door before leaving, he impulsively turned and went back to give Martha a hug. "Thank you, Mother."

"Always, Dear."

He arrived at the crime scene about the same time Beckett did. He met her with coffee, and she met him with questions.

"So what's going on with Alexis?"

"She wasn't accepted at Stanford. How could they think she's not worthy? She's perfect."

"Last week you didn't want her to go."

"Yeah, but I didn't not want her to get in. I was so sure she would. You got in."

"Well, I wouldn't now."

"I guess I wanted it to be her decision if she didn't go, not theirs. I wanted her to choose to stay closer to home.

"Well, all that aside, she must be crushed."

"She was."

"Don't you want to go back and spend the morning with her?"

"She didn't want to talk about it. I left her holed up in her room. Mother promised to call at the first sighting. I'll go home then."

"I'll do my best to get away right on time today, too."

"Hey, you two," Lanie called from the edge of the alley.

"'Morning, Lanie. What have we got?" Castle asked.

"John Doe. Looks like time of death could be between eleven last night and two in the morning. No wallet, no jewelry, no ID, nothing of value in his pockets. Looks like somebody picked up the closest blunt object and hit him on the head. As usual, I get more time, you get more accuracy. CSU is just closing up shop."

Ryan appeared and told them Esposito was talking to the young woman who found the body. "She's willing to talk to us, but she doesn't want to have to see it again. Pretty traumatized."

"Understandable. We'll go to her," Beckett answered. "Be right back, Lanie."

Esposito introduced them to a jittery looking young woman. She was on her way to work at a little diner around the corner when she saw the body at the edge of the alley.

"The guy I found…he's one of our regulars. He's…he was…a nice guy," she said.

"Did you know him well?" Beckett asked.

"If you mean outside work, no. Not at all. He was just one of those customers we all enjoyed."

"Do you know his name? Where he works or lives?"

"His first name is Mark. I think he worked shifts, too. We saw him at both ends of the day. He paid with a card sometimes, but never when I had his table. Maybe he did last night, though. I can give you the owner's number. She'd know who was working."

"I'd appreciate that. Is there anything you can remember about what he usually wore? Any kind of jewelry…a watch, a necklace, a ring…anything specific to him that you can remember? Did he seem to carry a lot of cash? Anything at all that could help us identify the things that seem to be missing? There was nothing of value with him…no phone, no ID. Was there anybody who came in with him?"

"He always came in alone…on his way to or from work, I think. Wait. I have a picture we took this fall," she said as she scrolled through the pictures on her phone. "It was a slow day, just some of the regulars; and we were all talking back and forth across the diner. Somebody got us all together at one table and took a selfie. There it is. We were all being goofy and posing like models. Looks like there's a good picture of his watch and a gold necklace." She looked at it sadly and added. "And it would be easier for anybody to identify him looking like this than like what I saw this morning."

"I'm sure it would. May I borrow your phone long enough to send that picture to my email?" Beckett asked.

"Sure. I hope it helps."

"And that name and phone number for the owner?" Castle reminded her. He pulled out his pocket notebook and jotted down the number.

"Thank you, Ms. Lennick. You've been very helpful." Beckett told her.

"It doesn't seem that you knew him well, but I'm sorry for your loss of someone who was a bright spot in your day. We all need some of those," Castle added. "Are you okay? Would you like me to walk you to the diner?"

"Thanks, but no. You stay and find out who did it. I'll be fine."

Beckett gave her a business card. "If you think of anything else, give me a call."

The young woman nodded and waved sadly as she left.

"I'm sending you this picture," she said to Ryan and Esposito. "Feel free to share it with some of the uniforms and see if anybody knows anything about him…or remembers seeing him with anyone."

"Looks like there's a camera on the corner…maybe one on the building across the street. I'll see what I can get," Ryan offered. "I'll get this to the uniforms and start canvassing," Esposito volunteered.

Castle and I will take another look here and then check at the diner…find out who was working last night and see if the regulars can help. We'll meet you back at the precinct, Beckett answered."

"Actually, if you don't really need me, I might run an errand while I'm this close. There's a little electronics/media equipment store a couple of blocks from here…" Castle started as they walked back to the crime scene.

"It can't wait a few… Oh. Is this your guy?"

"Yeah."

"Go ahead."

"It shouldn't take long. I'll meet you back at the car."

"Okay."

When Castle entered the store there was one other customer, but the man behind the counter called out, "Ricky. How ya doing? It's been too long. Be with you in a few minutes."

"No rush, Ben. I'll just see what kind of new toys you have."

Ben finished the transaction at the counter and crossed the small store to talk to Castle. "So what brings you in? Writing a new book again? I like Nikki Heat, by the way."

"Thanks."

"Is your detective wife as hot as you make Nikki in the books?"

"My wife is better than Nikki no matter how I compare them." He pulled his phone from his pocket and showed him a picture of the two of them together, one that Alexis took during intermission when they saw a show on Broadway. "I'm a happy man, Ben. I think this marriage is forever."

"That's great, man. I'm happy for you. So what brings you to my humble establishment this morning?"

"I need some things," he said quietly as he scrolled on his phone and pretended to still be talking about the pictures. "Is anybody else here?"

"Just me this morning. We can talk." Ben answered, speaking as quietly as Castle.

Taking a small piece of paper out of his shirt pocket, Castle said, "This is what I need," and handed it to Ben.

Ben looked at the list: A computer that can't be traced to me; A case of burner phones; A bug detector; Whatever you've got that allows me to have a conversation without anyone listening in.

"Geez, Ricky. You in trouble or something?" Ben asked quietly.

"The man who had my wife shot is still out there, and I want to be able to get my family out of town safely if it becomes necessary. Can you help me?"

"Yeah, sure. What kind of phones you want?"

"The kind that fell off the delivery truck somewhere in transit and can't be traced any farther than that."

"And you want a whole case?"

"Better too many than not enough."

"Got it."

"I might need a day or two to get this together. I'm guessing you're gonna want this well under the radar."

"The farther under, the better. I have cash. Give me an estimate on the high side of what you think it should cost, and I'll leave you enough to cover it. Can you package it and mail it for me?"

"No problem. Give me a minute to check a couple of things. Does it matter what kind of computer?"

"Apple, new, laptop, and loaded with anything I might need."

"Okay," he said a few minutes later. He wrote down a number, turned the page toward Castle, and said, "You told me to figure it on the high side."

"Not a problem. I'm adding something extra for your time and inconvenience…and your discretion. And I'm buying a game so it looks like I was here to buy something. You can ring up the game. The tax free part will be in an envelope in the corner next to the games, otherwise it'll be caught on your cameras. That corner is camera fuzzy, right?"

"Oh, you're getting good at this."

"Follow me over while we talk. You can mail the package to the address in the envelope and use that return address on it. Send it when you're able to get all of it together." He stopped in the corner and "looked at the merchandise" as he surreptitiously slipped the envelope between the boxes.

As Castle chose a game, Ben did a quick count of what was in the envelope. "You're a generous man, Ricky." Tucking the envelope under a box that he moved to the counter, he said, "I'll take care of this for you. Getting it to you this way, though, it may take about a week."

"That's fine. It isn't a pressing need at this point. Just trying to be prepared."

"I hope it all works out. Terrible thing what they did to her," Ben said as he rang up the game and bagged it.

"Thanks for the help, Ben. I really appreciate it."

"Anytime. Anything else you need, you let me know."

"Will do," Castle said and held a hand up in parting as he left to meet Beckett.

Beckett was leaning against the car checking her phone when he returned. "Is it all arranged?" she asked.

He nodded. "We'll talk later." His phone pinged with a text from Martha right then, letting him know she could hear sounds of Alexis moving around in her room. "That was Mother. Can you drop me off at home before you go back?"

"No problem." When Castle was about to get out of the car at their building she said, "Remind Alexis I love her?"

He leaned in to kiss her and promised, "I will."

xxxxx

When he walked in, Castle asked his mother, "Any sign of Alexis yet?" And, right on cue, Alexis was coming down the stairs.

"Hey, Honey. What's in the box?"

"My life of lies. I'm throwing it all out."

" All your awards. You worked hard for those."

"Did I? Half of them are participation trophies."

Castle took some of them out and held up some of the ones that were for actual achievements, but Alexis snatched them back put them back in the box roughly, and snapped, "The one I wanted was Stanford."

"I know Ashley is going to Stanford…"

"This has nothing to do with Ashley. It's me, Dad. I'm a failure."

"Hey. Just because you didn't get into one school does not make you a failure. But you are going to have to accept that you didn't get in and move on."

"How?"

They talked a few more minutes about the meaning of success and failure, Alexis not ready to see his point and Castle feeling a little failure in the fathering department. He did, however, convince her to leave the box downstairs and give it some more thought before she tossed everything. Then she went back to her room to sulk some more, saying she hadn't told Ashley yet and that he'd probably want to break up with his loser of a girlfriend. The drama was proof of her grandmother's contribution to her genetic makeup.

He ran both hands over his face as he breathed out a frustrated sigh. "What do I do now?" he asked his mother.

"We all wait for the teenage angst to blow over and our sensible girl to find her way back. You've been way too fortunate that you haven't had too much of this to deal with over the past few years. For some parents it's a regular occurrence."

"How do they cope?"

"They probably drink a lot," Martha said sagely.

"I can believe that. Will you be home this afternoon?" he asked. "I'm not asking you to change your plans if…"

"No plans, Dear. Go back to whatever you and Katherine were working on. I'll call if we need you."

Martha was bestowed with a second big hug in the same day, something of a record for the two of them, even as devoted to one another as they were under all the joking around to the contrary.

"Shoo. We'll be fine."

Not long before Beckett was scheduled to go home, Alexis appeared at the precinct, hardly looking like herself. Beckett saw her standing in the doorway behind Castle, and immediately became stepmother Kate. She walked over and took the teenager in her arms, and Alexis readily hugged her back.

"Honey, I'm so sorry. I know how much you were counting on this."

"I feel like such a failure."

"Well things have changed since I was accepted there. If I tried to get in now, I'd probably be feeling that way with you. But you're not a failure, and it's their loss that they didn't see that."

Alexis squeezed Kate a little tighter and held on for another moment before saying, "I know you're busy, but…"

"I'm never too busy for you. You know that."

"Could I borrow Dad for a few minutes?

"Sure."

"Hey, Pumpkin," Castle said quietly enough that the pet name was only between the three of them. He pointed to the break room and closed the door when they went in.

As Beckett stood watching the door close behind two of the most important people in her life, Gates came from her office and asked, "Is everything okay?" as if she actually cared.

Beckett turned in surprise and answered, "Alexis has had nearly perfect grades as long as she can remember. She and everybody else expected she would be accepted at any school she applied to; but Stanford just turned her down, and she's having a major crisis of confidence. I think she just needed her dad. It was just the two of them for most of her life. Don't worry. He'll talk to her and take her home so it won't be a distraction here for more than a few minutes. She's never done this before. She's usually such an adult and so self-confident. It won't be a habit."

"Detective, I'm not so heartless that I don't want my people to take care of their children. This is your stepdaughter, isn't it?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Then stop apologizing. It's close to closing time, and your team has put in some overtime this week. You've already told me the lab reports won't be in before tomorrow. Get Mr. Castle, and go home and talk to your child. And tell the rest of your team to go home, too."

"Thank you, Sir. I appreciate that."

She cleared her desk, spoke to the boys, made a few notes to herself for the next morning, and put the things she intended to take home on her desk while Castle talked to Alexis.

"Alexis, What's wrong?" Castle asked.

"Everything. How do you do it, Dad?"

"Do what?"

"Well, that letter you have framed in your office."

"My first manuscript rejection?" he asked with a little smile.

"Yeah. How can you stand having it there?"

"Because it drives me. And I got twenty more of those before Black Pawn agreed to publish In a Hail of Bullets. That letter? That letter reminds me of what I've overcome. Rejection isn't failure."

"It sure feels like failure."

"Failure is giving up. Everybody gets rejected. It's how you handle rejection that determines where you end up.

"My whole life has been about getting into any college I wanted. What is it now?"

"Whatever you make it, Alexis. Make it an adventure."

Alexis nodded and accepted a hug from her father, then she said she was going to stop in the ladies' room and would be right back.

"Is she okay?" Beckett asked when he returned to the bullpen and released a long exhale.

"Were any of us at that age?" Beckett nodded in agreement, and Castle said he would take Alexis home. Then he noticed the things on Beckett's desk. "What's this?"

"Gates told me to go on home and take care of my child. Who knew?"

As Alexis walked toward her father, he put his arm around her shoulders to guide her to the elevator. When Beckett joined them, his other arm instinctively went around her waist. It was obviously a strong, solid family in Gates's view as they left, including a man devoted to both women.

"Feel better, Little Castle," Esposito called as they got in the elevator. Ryan just waved. Alexis turned and waved back with an affectionate little smile for them before the door closed, and the extended family of friends was also in view.

xxxxx

"We need a distraction," Castle said as he hailed a cab. "That little theater with the recliners…the one that shows classic films… I passed it yesterday, and they've added The Princess Bride to their collection. It's showing now. We can have salads for dinner and go to a movie…and make up for the salads with a big tub of popcorn, or any of the other stuff they have."

"Alexis, what do you think?" Kate asked.

"Why not? If Dad can use his first rejection letter as an incentive, I need to start pulling myself out of this pit of despair and figure out what to do next."

"That's the spirit," Castle agreed, taking out his phone and looking up the theater. "Next show starts at seven-thirty. I'll see if Mother wants to go, too."

Alexis and Kate talked while Castle spoke to his mother, who opted to go out for drinks with a friend since Alexis was in good hands.

"Just us," Castle reported, and told the driver he could drop them off at the next corner.

"The theater is a block away…"

"And great salads two doors down," Alexis added.

"I've never been here," Kate told them.

"Then you're in for a treat," Alexis assured her.

During dinner Kate asked, "Do you want to talk about other possibilities or not think about college at all tonight?"

"Dad's right. I do have to face that I need to find another one. I had considered others, but everything seemed to fall in place around Stanford, and I…"

Kate put her hand over her stepdaughter's and said, "We don't have to talk about it now if you don't want to."

"I got a tour of Stanford when I visited Mom last year, and I set my sights on it. I guess I should visit the campuses I didn't see."

"You and your dad could go and see some of them, and maybe I could come along when I have a weekend off."

"I'd like that."

"How many did you actually consider?"

"Ten. Nine without Stanford."

"Yeah, you'll probably want to narrow that down," Castle suggested.

"Will you go with me?"

"Wouldn't miss it," he assured her.

They finished their meal, enjoyed their movie, and returned home with everyone feeling at least a little better about things.

"Thanks, Dad," Alexis said, wrapping her arms around his waist. "You always know what to do."

"Not always, but I'll always give it my best shot."

Then she moved on to Kate with another hug. "Thanks Kate. Dad's stuck with me, but you could have escaped tonight. Thanks for putting up with a sorrowful, sniveling stepdaughter."

"Where was she? I was seeing a disappointed but struggling to salvage her self-respect stepdaughter. And I was pretty impressed with her."

Alexis held Kate a little tighter for a moment and then stepped back and smiled. "Thanks for tonight, both of you. Sorry about all the drama today, Dad."

"Hey, we're all human. It's in there and has to come out sometimes. We all need a day like that now and then." Kate just nodded in agreement.

"I think I'll go to bed. I guess I've worn myself down letting it out," she admitted, looking a little self-conscious.

"Night, Honey," she heard simultaneously from both of them.

"Does wine sound as good to you as it does to me?" Castle asked when Alexis was upstairs.

"Probably not quite," Kate teased. "You were here for the whole process."

"Mother, too for a lot of it. That's probably why she opted for drinks with a friend."

"Just a small glass for me…and you can tell me about your guy. We haven't had a chance to talk since then."

"I gave him my list, which, as I expected, surprised him. I told him I was trying to be prepared to protect my family if necessary, and he understood. He's a family man, too. Long story short, He's going to send it to Black Pawn in about a week with a misleading return address on it. Someone at the front desk will sign for it, so I'll go in and talk to the receptionist who's usually there and tell her to call me when it arrives. I'll think of some convincing reason that I needed to have it delivered there."

"Thanks, Rick," she answered, leaning her head on his shoulder.

"I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted. I'm going to have a shower and collapse into bed. Want to join me?"

"Sounds great."

Castle drained the rest of the wine from his glass, left it in the kitchen and took Kate's empty glass from her hand and put it on the counter with his. Then he lovingly put his arm around her shoulder and led her to the shower. They stripped out of their clothes, washed away the day's worries, and snuggled against one another in their bed, both falling asleep quickly.