'My bad. He's getting jealous and depressed.'
Since she was someone who had been in love twice in her life, she understood how much not being able to see your beloved makes you lonely.
She felt guilty for not feeling the same for Ferdinand yet, but she can't force her own feelings.
'Did I act too coldly the other day?'
She realized she had to up her acting skills. She doesn't have feelings for him yet, but she does see him in a better light now. And he had been so considerate to her.
'Should I kiss him back to make him feel better?'
But they were in her room, sitting on her bed. If she kissed him back now, Ferdinand would want to go all the way.
[If only it was so easy to hold back even when she's so close to me, I would stay in the palace and kiss her like this every single day. At least she would remember I'm the one with her now and not think of her former lover all the time.]
'I'm not thinking of Andrew all the time!'