373. Filler of the ~Planet of the Apes~

"What the hell!?" asked the atheist man. "I've been so alone... God! Why don't you ever answer me!?"

I... DID!!! WHA-!? I'VE SENT YOU ENOUGH BLESSING YOU LITTLE PIECE OF-!!!

The man jumps off the bridge.

OH, COME ON!!!

Later...

AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! AH HA!!!

The man squirms right in front of God. "I didn't think you were real. But the dinosaurs-..."

Just because genesis is in the Bible, it doesn't mean that the first part of the Bible is entirely literal, you idiot! IDIOT!!!

"So, I'm going to hell?"

You're going to hell. Yes. 

"Geez..."

But if you wish, you will be redeemed after 300 years. Almost a year in Earth's time.

The man bows his head and enters a portal to Hell.

Say hello to my Grandchild for me! She owns Hazbin Hotel!

Jesus walks by. "You know, you don't have to be that harsh to the atheists... He wasn't that bad..."

He went to Hell because he brought no good to the world and hurt the people he loves by hurting himself and being unable to love himself in the first place. So, he'd have to wait 300 years for redemption.

"Okay... I see, Father... I just think we should forgive more than punish."

There  are  atheists out there with kind and loving hearts. The atheists that have no sense of value in life, especially their own, however, are ungrateful scum.

"Maybe we should try offering a support group system for those in Hell. Same here for Heaven. It's boring out here," said Miguel.

I see... Also, what are you doing here!? It is not your time to ascend.

"Lost my rest world. Compromised. So I went here to take a rest," replied Miguel.

Miguel leaves the portal and enters the CoolDudeBus. "Hey, guys! Wakey wakey! We hit a giant boulder!"

Everyone groans, still asleep

"C'mon!" yelled Miguel. "I made breakfast! Fresh Sashimi! Raw Fish I found by hunting the salmon! I thoroughly cleaned them, by the way! Guys?"

Everyone ignores Miguel. 

"Hm... What if I told you that we're in an alternate universe where the world is still in tribal times? And when I say the world, I mean... the entire world!"

"WHAT!?" asked everyone, waking up.

Meanwhile...

Raphael enters the room and speaks with the others. "Mr. Pines. I believe that my sister and her group had entered a very dangerous world. They need this Anti-Viral Vaccine."

Dipper stares at it. "Anti-Simian Influenza?"

Later...

"Thanks..." said Gabrielle, as Raphael injects her with the syringe. 

"What's the point of the vaccine?" asked Jotaro.

"This world has been ruled by various Ape Species. The humans, meanwhile, have diminished their intelligence because of the virus."

Miguel warps a spell, making them immune from ever carrying the virus. "Plague Protection Spell finished! Just drink these potions and you'd all be fine!"

They nod.

The group drives their CoolDudeBus in the forest, silently.

"So... what the hell is this place?" asked Gabrielle.

"I believe they call this place the Western Ape Kingdom," said Raphael. "Be very quiet..."

"Alright..." said Gabrielle. "Listen to my brother, guys... Turning on Bus's stealth mode. We're currently on Earth-2011. It's currently 2036 in this Universe."

Later... everyone just stays quiet the entire time...

"So... we're looking for Vegeta's armor..." said Josuke.

Raphael stares at Miguel.

"Uh... Hey!" smiled Miguel. "Anything in your mind?"

"Nothing..." said Raphael. "It is just that... You resemble my father."

"Yeah... But I'm not your father... But we're still family, y'know?"

Raphael smiles. "Yes. I know." Raphael suddenly pants. "Ogh! Ogh! Ogh! Ogh!"

"What's wrong...?" asked Miguel.

"What the hell is he doing?" asked Jotaro.

"He's feeling danger... So am I..."

Gabrielle and Josuke woge and tick their wings.

Yurielle listens. She takes out her knives.

"No!" yelled Raphael. "NO!!! YOU WILL AGGRAVATE THEM!!!"

Suddenly, a wave of leaves falls over them. Several leaves follow after the sudden wave. A violent rustling could be heard as the entire group stayed quiet out of fear.

*CLANG!!!*

Several footsteps drop on the roof of the CoolDudeBus.

A chimpanzee lands before them. The chimp is a Nigeria-Cameroon Chimp, just like Raphael.

"Shit!" yelled the group.

They come out of portals and shrink the bus as they all face against several Chimps. They all have green eyes peering at them. Unlike regular chimps that are naturally playful on their Earth, these chimps are like Raphael. They have conserved movements and are quite peaceful. However, right now, they are intimidating the humans, AKA, the JoJoCorps.

"LEAVE!!! THIS!!! LAND!!!" yelled the chimp before them. "YOU ARE POWERFUL!!! DANGEROUS!!! LEAVE!!!"

They begin doing sign language.

One said, "Kill the humans!"

"Slay them!"

"Banish them!"

"They dare challenge us!?"

Gabrielle sighs and does sign language as well. "Wait!" she said in American sign language. "We are peaceful visitors of another world. Please do not hurt us."

He pants softly.

Raphael sighs and offers his hand, cupping it to the leader.

The leader is unfazed. "I do not trust you." The leader growls as Gabrielle and Josuke Wahrewoge out of fear.

They back away out of horror.

They tick their wings and purr.

"We... are also... different..." Raphael spoke. 

Raphael nods.

Yurielle throws a knife to a tree and it curves back into her hand.

Jotaro and Irene pick up sticks on the ground with their Stands.

Shizuka turns invisible.

Miguel opens more portals.

The apes are impressed and in awe by this performance.

Raphael offers his hand again, palms facing up as he bows before the leader.

The leader sighs. "If you try anything... we'll kill you."

The leader brushes his fingers above Raphael's palm.

"I am Raphael JoJo."

"I am King Cornelius I. Son of King Caesar I. Son of Will Rodman."

"Who is Will-?" asked Shizuka.

"Sh!" shushed Jotaro.

"Sorry..." said Shizuka.

The group followed after the apes. They enter a beautiful forest filled with tree houses similar to nipa huts. The apes all walk upright like Raphael.

There are banners that show this symbol.

These weaved banners could be found around their treehouses and placed on their armors.

"Ogh! Ogh! Ogh!" yelled Cornelius as the Apes panted back. "Welcome to the Western Ape Kingdom. We live on the west coast of what was formerly known as the United States of America. Here, we work, sleep, farm, cook, and eat. Recently, the younger generation like myself had begun artistry."

"Generation gaps, baby!" laughed Miguel. "Hey! Lookin' good, ladies!" Miguel points to a group of female chimps.

The female chimps giggle.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" asked Gabrielle.

"I had sex with an elephant," said Miguel.

At lunchtime, they are served with baked apples in honey, yams mixed with dairy, spiced roast deer, spiced roast catfish, spiced roast clams, nuts, native cheeses, and several fruits for dessert. They eat among the other apes in a circle around a fire. They have no tables and they have to hold up the dishes in their hands.

"You have brought... healthy humans... to... our... kingdom!!! CORNELIUS!!!" yelled an orangutan.

The orangutan charges toward the JoJoCorps.

Cornelius then grabs him and tackles him to the ground. He scoffs.

Maurice, another orangutan, growls then hisses at this ape.

He scoffs and walks away.

"That was Zaius," said Cornelius. "He... was never very trusting of humans..."

"This is a fun place you have here..." smiled Gabrielle. 

"We really appreciate you welcoming us here," smiled Shizuka.

"My father welcomed your kind as well..."

A blonde human woman ate among them. 

"Who's she?" asked Gabrielle.

"Nova," said Maurice. "My daughter."

Miguel laughs with the young children of the chimps, creating constructs of butterflies for them to play with. They hoot and laugh with Miguel.

"How much do we have in the trauma jar?" asked Jotaro.

"Trauma jar?" asked Irene.

"It's a jar we put a Physical Unit in when we get traumatized. I put one in after Miguel flirted with those chimp women."

"Lemme put one in, too," smiled Irene. "No offense, guys."

"No, it's fine. We find humans sexually repulsive as well," said Cornelius. "There is something seriously wrong with your Messiah."

Miguel teaches the children jack en poy.

"I know that he's just innocently playing with our children, but if he's attracted to our women... This is just concerning," said Cornelius.

"Don't worry..." said Gabrielle. "He's not a pedo. He's just attracted to animals, aliens, plants creatures, Supernaturals, and objects who had entered adulthood."

"'Objects?'" asked Cornelius.

"Y-Yeah... I saw... the objects he did it with before dating Anne again... She never considered it cheating..." said Gabrielle. "But I argue otherwise."

"I heard them..." said Yurielle.

Cornelius is intrigued by Yurielle. "Where are your eyes?"

Yurielle shakes her head. "I can't see."

"How do you navigate?"

"My other senses have enhanced. I could basically think up a black-and-white renaissance painting in my head."

"Welp!" smiled Miguel. "That's enough spicy oily stuff for me! Any more and I won't be able to mastur-... mastur-... master... feng shui...?"

"I thought you were going to say, 'masturbate.'"

"So did I," replied Miguel.

"Your father is a peculiar one," said Cornelius.

"I say that he's more like a weird whacky long lost uncle," said Gabrielle

"I second that," said Raphael.

Shrieking could be heard near them.

Near the horizon came an army of apes wearing armors with a different symbol on the chest of their armors.

"What's with the smartphone flag?" asked Irene.

"It represents their King's desire for freedom," said Cornelius.

"From who?" asked Jotaro.

"From your kind..." said Cornelius. "Do you wish to help us?"

"Well-..." said everyone, as they all excused themselves with random bullshit.

"Good," said Cornelius. "See you down there."

Cornelius climbs down the great valley of trees.

Cornelius faces against the race of apes from the south. He is wearing very thin chainmail armor with the window symbol. He has a spear in his hand.

"Ogh! Ogh!" yelled Cornelius. "General Aldo! Leave this place!"

General Aldo speaks in Spanish to his people. "¡Silencio! ¡Retírense! (Quiet! Stand down, apes!)" He speaks English to Cornelius. "Cornelius!" he spoke in a Spanish accent. "We... have... been patient with you! We are... tired... of you being near... our territory! Ogh! Ogh! You have... been expanding... your... land! Your people... have been eating our food... drinking our water... taking our wood... planting... in... our land... fishing in... our... water!"

"You have been incredibly tyrannical toward your people, Aldo..." said Cornelius. "We have been trying to retain peace with you. You responded with aggression... and so much anger..."

"YOU... SILENCE... YOURSELF!!! LETTING... HUMANS... LIVE... NEAR US...! CORNELIUS... LOVE... HUMANS... MORE... THAN... APE!!!"

Cornelius growls at General Aldo. "Apes together strong. You are no ape."

General Aldo shrieks and charges his armies at Cornelius as Cornelius' own ape army attacks.

The Western Apes fight against the Simios.

"Should we get out of here?" asked Josuke.

"We could at least fight the battle a bit!" smiled Miguel.

"Alright..." said Gabrielle.

"I still won't kill, by the way. I'd just brutally inconvenience them for life through paralyzing them."

Later...

"Jesus Christ..." said a bloody Miguel. "I didn't kill any of them but that was still pretty disgusting."

Everyone pants out of tiredness.

"So..." said Cornelius.  "You certainly have powers."

"Yeah..." sighed Gabrielle. "We have abilities that make us different. People in our world... Normal people... hate what we are. We are kept divided by our class in society."

Cornelius nods. "I see... Raphael JoJo."

"Yes?" asked Raphael.

"Keep your family safe..." said Cornelius.

Raphael nods.

Later...

The CoolDudeBus waves for Raphael goodbye as they pick up Vegeta's armor and leaves.

Raphael, back in the Reapercave, watching over the group.