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Pay 99 Yuan: Arranging A Mysterious Funeral For You

Author: Hotpot With Cilantro
Urban
Ongoing · 533.5K Views
  • 40 Chs
    Content
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Synopsis

Su Chen transmigrated to a parallel world and inherited a funeral company. To his surprise, he awakened the God-tier Funeral System because of it. Regardless of whether a person wanted to leave behind a legendary tale in the world, or they wanted to create a mysterious and extraordinary history so that others would suspect that they were bigwigs, they could do so through Su Chen’s funeral company. [With only 99 Yuan, I will appear personally at your funeral with a black tuxedo. With a black umbrella in my hand, I will silently observe the entire funeral.] [With 10,000 Yuan, there will be 100 men in black at your funeral. A Maybach will drive through your funeral and an old man, dressed in a Chinese tunic suit, will bow and put flowers on your tombstone. He will then leave with a stern expression.] [With 100,000 Yuan, 3000 men in black will appear at your funeral with black umbrellas. It will be a gray and drizzly day. A military helicopter will circle the sky. Three old men dressed in black Chinese tunic suits, and two teary women, will pay their respects at your tombstone.] … [With 10 billion Yuan, your funeral will be broadcast to the public via Livestream. The heavens and the earth will shake while your coffin is carried to its final destination by nine dragons. The entire world will dim! All the world leaders will kneel and bow before your grave. Bizarre phenomena will appear in the sky while dark clouds will loom over the vast space. All the stars in the sky shall decorate your tombstone while the sun and the moon bid farewell to you.] [The company can fulfill all kinds of requests as long as you pay us enough.] [Place an order now and you will have a mysterious past immediately.]

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Chapter 1Activating The God-level Funeral Payment System!

"I thought this would be one of those silver-spooned kick-starters, but I didn't expect it to be a lost cause. A funeral company, of all things? The account books are spotless, how am I going to proceed with this?"

Su Chen looked at the slightly dilapidated funeral company in front of him and could not help but sigh dejectedly.

After transmigrating to this world, he soon claimed the inheritance of his cheap father, saying that it was a company.

He originally thought that it was a solid listed company, but never had he expected it to be such a shabby shop. It was just a small shop, claiming to be a company!

Moreover, it was not of the most auspicious of natures.

The word 'funeral' was enough to turn people away.

Su Chen felt a headache coming. This shop did not look like it would remain open soon. He did not even know how to pay rent. If he continued to do this, he might even lose his underpants!

If he still failed to pay the rent for another month, he would have to close the shop!

The image of the landlady's arrogant smirk flew into his mind. She was extremely oppressive and threw her weight about without holding back. Su Chen felt extremely aggrieved.

If not for his good looks, temperament, and sharp fashion, that old woman would have kicked him out long ago!

[Ding! Activating the god-tier payment and burial system!]

A crisp sound suddenly rang in his ears!

System?!

Su Chen was stunned for a moment, but he quickly reacted. This should be one of those systems from those web novels!

In his previous life, he had read quite a few novels!

A standard god-tier artifact for transmigrators. Who would have thought that he would have a system too!?

As expected..,

[Congratulations, the host has successfully bound to a god-level funeral payment system!]

[The system can provide funeral services at all prices. We strive to create the most perfect of mysterious funerals for our customers, services that even dragons would never be found wanting!]

[As long as the price is right, we can create funeral arrangements at any level! This will allow our customers to have a mysterious and terrifying past!]

[The current price provided by the system has been announced on the corresponding online platforms. Customers can contact you on their own!]

[The host will receive an extra reward for completing a funeral service!]

...

Upon hearing the system's voice, a smile appeared on Su Chen's face.

Not bad!

This system was related to his current business.

Su Chen did not really want to run such a service. After all, it was dark and inauspicious, and he had his share of misfortunes in life.

However, since the system had appeared, he had to do it.

He quickly looked at the pricing and services provided by the system.

[Pay 10,000 yuan, 100 men in black with wireless earphones will appear at your funeral. A Black Maybach will appear at the funeral site. An old man in a Chinese tunic suit will bow deeply to your tombstone, present a bouquet, and leave solemnly!]

[For 100,000 yuan, a Rolls Royce will appear at the funeral scene on the day of the funeral. 3,000 men in black with umbrellas will appear at your funeral. Three old men in black Chinese tunic suits and two tearful women will pay their respects to your tombstone!]

...

These were all paid actors. Even if it was an ordinary person's funeral, it would cause everyone to wonder how mysterious and terrifying the person was when they were alive!

After all, how else would these mysterious characters and entourage appear at the funeral of an ordinary person?

Almost every price corresponding to the arrangement was different. The higher the price, the grander the more extravagant things would get!

Out of curiosity, Su Chen scrolled down to the bottom of the list.

[For 1,000,000,000 yuan, your funeral will be announced to the heavens in the form of a live broadcast. All sorts of famous people in the current world will come to your grave and prostate themselves before you! Heaven and earth will tremble, lights will go out, nine dragons will act as pallbearers! Heaven and earth will cast omens, the stars in the sky will become your tombstones, the sun and moon will perform for you!

The nine dragons will guide your coffin deep into the void, and all living beings will worship and praise you!

The Ten Thousand Realm Monarchs will send you off!

The temples and Buddha statues in the world will recite the sutras for you!

The gods in the sky will weep for you!

The women in thousands of worlds will cry for you!

Countless treasures will protect your body and be entombed with you!

...]

Su Chen did not know what to say.

He did not dare to continue watching. He only felt his pulse racing. He wished that he could have such a funeral for himself!

If such a thing even existed, he could drop dead on the spot!

Such an arrangement was ridiculous!

Who would even withstand such a thing!

What kind of scene would it be when these events, characters, and treasures all appeared together?

A moment later...

Su Chen pulled his mind out of the clouds. His shop was about to close down in dilapidated condition.

Since he had all the necessary arrangements now, the next step was to wait for such a fated customer.

Since Su Chen was the only one in the shop, he could only take care of the shop by himself.

...

Soon, it was noon.

The phone of the funeral company rang!

It was a landline phone. Su Chen quickly put down the work in his hands and answered the phone.

"Hello! Hello, is this the Su Funeral Company?"

From the other end of the phone came a hoarse voice of an old man. He sounded old, gravelly, and world-weary.

As the Su funeral company had been operating in Qingyang County for a few years, some people knew of its existence.

Su Chen replied, "Yes, this is the Su Funeral Company. We specialize in funeral services!"

"Mm, that's good! I want to do a funeral service, but it's not very convenient for me to move right now. Do you think you can send someone over?"

The old man sounded weak and tired.

He was probably bedbound.

That did not matter, such an opportunity had already presented itself!

Su Chen quickly said enthusiastically,

"Okay, no problem! Tell me the address, and I'll go there myself!"

The other party gave him the address.

Su Chen packed up briefly, put on his rather dashing black leather biker suit, and kicked the motorcycle on the road.

The address was 648 Huanhe district in Qingyang County, which was not too far away.

At that moment...

Huanhe district was actually an old residential area.

648 was a dilapidated old house.

The door was tightly shut.

The large red word "demolish" was painted on the wall, which was particularly glaring.

An old man was sitting in the courtyard. His eyes were sunken, his face was pale and gaunt, and his hands were trembling slightly.

He wore an old-fashioned military cap, which had been mended many times. It looked heavy and worn.

His name was Chu Guozhong, and he was an old soldier.

The medal on his chest was shining under the reflection of the sunlight.

However, the toil left by the years on his body was too heavy. The wrinkles on his face seemed to be filled with vicissitudes. He no longer had the valiant and heroic fighting aura of the past. Even taking two steps would make him gasp for breath!

As he thought back to the past, the rain of bullets and artillery fire did not even make him frown as he charged into battle. How valiant was that?

Chu Guozhong was filled with sorrow. Now that he was suffering from a terminal illness, he did not have much time left.

The hero was in his twilight years. The sun was setting in the west

Just now, he saw the advertisement that popped up on his phone. It was from the Su family's funeral company. The funeral services in it made him, a veteran, feel an inexplicable excitement! When he was alive, he had kept a low profile. After he died, if he could make people revere him, wouldn't that be pretty good?

When he retired, he had the right to take up a post in the capital. But later, for various reasons, he returned to this small county, got married, had children, and lived a bustling life. In his later years, he should have been happily enjoying the happiness of having his children and grandchildren around him, unexpectedly, not long ago, his house was slated to be demolished, and some hush money was quickly distributed!

The money quickly became a curse for his family. His children began to quarrel among themselves, arguing over its claim!

His children and their children, who were all filial and beautiful in his eyes, became twisted and mutilated under the temptation of money!

The veteran Chu Guozhong, in a fit of anger, donated all the money to charity!

Decades ago, he fought bravely for the kingdom under the rain of bullets!

Now, he had even selflessly donated this money to the country! It was all for his country!

When he saw the advertisement for the Su Family's Funeral Company, he was a little moved!

As he looked at the photo of his wife, Chu Guozhong's eyes welled up with tears:

"Dear, I'll see you soon. Please allow me to be selfish for one last time!"

At that moment, there was a knock on the door!

Chu Guozhong went to open the door shakily

Standing outside the door was Su Chen...

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