Comments of chapter undefined of Be Gentle, Immortal Master
Be Gentle, Immortal Master
Witchhazel
Chapter comments18
Hmmm 2 different versions. The first one was more fast n furious. This latest version is like drinking wine. Giving it some time to breathe before enjoying it to its maximum. Both versions are good though. Depending how you wanna go with the following chaps!! đđŒđđŒ
Aw sorry I made so many of you read two different versions đ Thank you for your feedback and so sorry for the trouble my dear! Glad you liked them both. My biggest concern with the first one is that Bai Ye suddenly becomes too easy to convince đ it doesnât seem to fit the previous chapters very well. Maybe in my next book, Iâll make the characters less emotionally fragile and go full fast and fury!
this episode was do sweet omg... so gentle and full of love, and this apology felt like he was trying to genuinely make amends for their future rather than him just being sorry that he got caught â€â€ he's going to get better now that he's not resisting and suppressing the love that they so clearly share for each other đ„°
I like it!! the imagery of the memory adds a lot more "show, don't tell" too it as well as making the readers experience the same sort of sad nostalgia that she is experiencing, and im really glad you kept the speech because it's really well worded and solidifies what she implied with the memory. I think it would be worth adding another kiss so you can keep the line of him saying "did that count?" because we didn't really get to see him respond beyond loosely accepting her words on a very hesitant physical level (and also because I really like that line xD it's funny, but also gives hope for his spirit returning a little)
