The Only Thing Holding Him Back

The two friends played for about fifteen minutes before taking a water break. Roman had been so distracted that he missed his shot three separate times. Harry was in the lead.

He eyed him skeptically. "Dude, you are way off your game today. Do I need to make sure you're not on my team tomorrow? I don't want you dragging me down since I have a month-long winning streak going."

"Penny has been acting strange since she got home from the hospital," Roman blurted.

"Strange how?"

He explained everything without going into what they fought about, simply that they had argued before she went to the emergency room. Harry listened but didn't seem terribly concerned.

"I think you might be overthinking this, my friend. She's probably whacked out on pain meds and that's why she's forgetting things like putting on her ring. My sister was pretty out of it while she was recovering from a C-section.

"Abdomen pain is hard to deal with because it severely limits your range of motion. You have no idea how many muscles are in your stomach until you can't use them without it hurting. She complained about everything from laughing to bending over for weeks."

Roman thought it over. Was that really all there was to it? Penny hadn't been laughing as much as usual either. If she was only stopping herself because it hurt that meant she wasn't mad at him, right?

But why hadn't she said anything? She wasn't the type to bottle up her feelings. Happy or sad, she never held back letting him know how she felt.

"I don't know, Harry…" he trailed off, trying to find the right words to explain himself. "She would tell me if her pain was bothering her. Her entire family is full of the most straightforward people I've ever met."

Harry snorted. "You've got me there. That brother-in-law of yours especially—he's something else."

"Not helping."

His friend shrugged. "I'm not sure what you want me to say. Why don't you talk to her about all of this?"

Roman sighed and chugged from his water bottle before answering. "I don't want to bother her while she needs to focus on healing. If she gets angry at me again, that will only hinder her recovery."

Harry clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Then wait it out a little longer. If she's still acting weird once the recovery period the doctor gave you is over, then you can talk it out. Shall we get back to our game?"

A wry smile appeared on his face. One thing Harry was always good for was distractions.

"Sure."

They got back to their game and Roman pushed the matter out of his mind, managing to catch up on points so he lost by a hair instead of spectacularly like before. He was glad a friend like Harry always had his back.

===

Penelope got through the rest of the weekend by the skin of her teeth. Sunday was awkward but at least she managed to remember to wear her wedding ring.

Roman practically waited on her hand and foot, making all three meals and bringing her snacks or water whenever it looked like she was going to try and get up from the couch. She wasn't used to this level of pampering at all.

From a young age, she had learned to be independent and spent a lot of time taking care of Percy while their parents were busy. It had only gotten worse after her dad died and she had to shoulder the rest of her family's problems on her own.

It wasn't only that she didn't depend on anyone else—she couldn't make herself do it, feeling like if she wasn't in control that nothing would get done. She didn't have anyone she could really depend on left anyway.

Percy was off in his own little world dealing with his grief in his own unique way. Her mom was completely unreachable. And Missy had two-year-old twins that kept her incredibly busy.

Not wanting to bother anyone, Penelope relied solely on herself. Being taken care of like this was bizarre.

By the time Monday rolled around, she was relieved to be left alone again for a while. She got back to the journals and found an entry from the spring of her alternate self's junior year of high school.

'Dear Diary, I got asked to prom today by a guy in my history class. It should be fun because we have some overlapping friends and plan to form the ultimate party group! I ran into Roman as he was coming home from school and told him about it.

'He didn't seem very happy to hear the news. Come to think of it…he didn't go to either of his proms. Is he jealous that I'm going? If he wanted to go so badly, he should have asked someone. But I must admit I'm strangely glad he didn't.

'He never has any girls around him other than me. I'm friends with him on Facebook and the only pictures he ever gets tagged in are with guys. I'd wonder if he was gay if not for that conversation I overheard between him and Harry a while back.

'Sometimes I wonder if maybe he does like me before dismissing the thought as crazy. Someone as amazing as Roman would never like someone as ordinary as me.'

Ha. If only she knew.

Regular school life and volleyball talk continued in the journal with occasional speculation about whether or not he really did like her, particularly after a conversation they had where Roman said he didn't know his type because he hadn't met the right girl yet.

Toward the end of her senior year when she got accepted into her dream school, which Penelope unfortunately had to turn down in her world, her suspicions were essentially confirmed.

'Dear Diary, I got into LAIAD!!! We went out to dinner with the Crosses to celebrate at my favorite restaurant. Everybody congratulated me but Roman was especially enthusiastic. He ended up picking me up and spinning me around when I told him.

'Of course he immediately got awkward and apologetic about it, like he was embarrassed or something. It was a sort of couple-y thing to do. If he likes me, why hasn't he ever said anything? Is it because I'm so much younger than him?

'That sort of thing only matters when you're young. Once you graduate from high school, age isn't as big of a deal anymore from what Mom and Dad say. They're three years apart and it's never been an issue because when they met they were both college students.

'I wonder if that's the only thing holding him back. I'll have to keep an eye on him. He's never treated me any differently for being younger than him so I wonder why he'd be hung up on that now.

'He probably has some dumb noble, self-sacrificing reason for it. He's always doing things that make other people happy but what about his own happiness? Is he even happy at all? I know he doesn't like the career path his parents chose for him…'