San Francisco — 1987 Night

Fog shatters the glow from street lamps into fragments of electric stars. Neil is waiting outside Aidan’s apartment. He has waited all night. He has waited all day. Sometimes when he closes his eyes, he sees the silent white baby in the field of his childhood.

He has been trying not to think of Pam, trying not to hope, but refusing to mourn. He is no longer considering the divide between them. He is only conscious that he loves her, no matter what she is or what he must become. He is sure she cannot be dead. She cannot be gone forever. It’s just not possible. He will not allow it. It’s not an option.

Aidan opens the door to the night. He is dressed for dancing. He is groomed for death. He is dazzling as a cold sun, untouchable and distant as a god.