The second part of the Chunin Exam started a half-hour ago and Rei was currently crouched on a branch high in a tree deep within the Forest of Death, contemplating the weird feelings within him.
"How strange. I can't even remember when I last had a kidnapping mission." Rei chuckled in nostalgia. It was a long time since he had any kind of mission. That's why his current situation seemed so funny to him.
He sensed his target running deeper and deeper into the forest and mused how nice it must be, being so woefully ignorant. If he wanted, he could kill almost everyone in these Chunin Exams the same way the Otsutsuki clan could decimate the Elemental Nation upon their descent.
These kids, just like the Elemental Nations, never even dreamed of the possibility of someone so much stronger than them suddenly appearing out of nowhere and attacking them.
Ignorance really was bliss...
Fortunately for the world, he was here and he would be damned if the planet on which he lived was destroyed by some rabbit bastards-
'Oi!' A voice in his head protested which he promptly ignored...
The Elemental Nations should be really happy to have him. His efforts would prevent a war with an alien race. If someone told Rei in his past life he would find himself in this kind of position, he would have laughed at him, and yet, here he was.
"I will definitely have to brag about my exploits once I am done with the shielding seal barrier for the planet. Since I am putting in the effort, I should be appropriately praised for it, don't you think?" Rei spoke to the wind.
'Not really.' Kaguya dryly butted in, 'Shouldn't the knowledge that your people are safe be a reward in itself for you?'
"Hmm... you know what? You are probably righ- HELL NAH!" Rei mock-pompously exclaimed and promptly got an impression of amusement from his mental tenant. "If I do something nice for someone and that someone has no idea about it, how could he or she revere me for it? Do I look like an idio-, ahem, a saint to you?"
The amusement simply intensified at that, joined by a small echo of, 'Shameless', in the back of his mind but Rei decided to believe it was just his imagination.
As they say, talking to a voice in your mind is not something a sane person would do, so ignoring it anytime it doesn't say something nice about you should surely be the correct approach in this situation.
'I heard that...'
"Mhm. Time for my mission." Rei firmly nodded to himself and went back to sensing his target.
'Oi, are you ignoring me?'
Getting the position of his target, he bent his knees and jumped, starting to move along the treeline silently and stealthily, easily, just like a gentle breeze.
'He is totally ignoring me. Sigh.'
It didn't take him long to reach his mark. In a clearing in front of him, Orochimaru and the three sound genins gathered while Rei observed their meeting, hidden in the thick bushes around as he masked his chakra signature and presence.
'Just you wait. Once I am out of my seal, I will relegate you to the couch guard duty! Not immediately, momma needs her milk, after all... But one day, when you will least expect it, IT. WILL. HAPPEN! HMPH!'
For some reason, Rei shuddered but decided that today his imagination was exceptionally wild. No need for concern... He will just have to remember to get rid of his couch. No biggie.
He mentally received an impression of astonished bewilderment and knew his solution was the correct one.
No matter... Rei seemed to be quite lucky as the meeting in the clearing was already concluding and Orochimaru jumped into the foliage, leaving the three genins to their own devices. Rei followed Orochimaru with his senses for a good while and when he deemed he was far enough... his attention shifted to the three unsuspecting kiddies in the clearing again.
They were so... unconcerned.
'They probably think Orochimaru is the biggest and baddest lad around these parts. Poor delusional fools.' Rei thought with a mock exasperated sigh. 'Just look at how they move. Such ease in every movement. They clearly believe in their superiority over anything that is in this forest and isn't Orochimaru.'
It was surreal, really. Watching genins that have no idea about the wide world. They were like frogs on the bottom of the well, unknowingly stalked by a hungry rabbit-
'Rabbits don't eat frogs...'
- that wanted to prey on them...
Rei rolled his eyes. It didn't matter what rabbits did or did not eat. In this world, there was this Rabbit Goddess-
'Here we go again...'
- that could destroy planets, create dimensions on a whim, and loved to eat every single cookie in his secret stash... how she found his secret stash is anyone's guess. Nevertheless, that was not nice. Not nice at all-
'And I already said I am sorry!'
- but no amount of apologies could make up for that fact. It saddened Rei greatly that such a heinous deed was performed by his favorite pet rabbit-
'I will bite you... !'
- and even though he knew the rabbit loved him deeply, he couldn't just let it go. There had to be retribution, no?
'No.'
Alas... Rei had his mind set. Since his cookies were under heavy assault from his pet rabbit whenever he made a new battalion of them, Rei simply decided to... stop making them. It was a simple solution, really.
'Oh, you will deeply regret that. Maybe not today, maybe not even a week later, but one day... surely.'
Rei could only imagine the deep regret in his beloved rabbit's eyes as she realized the cause of her deeds. The sheer sadness coursing through these lovely lavender orbs where one could lose himself in their beauty. Her juicy desirable red lips must be set in a small cute frown by now, and her rosy cheeks are most likely adorably puffed out-
'You have a mission, don't you? Get on with it!'
As an impression of embarrassed outrage entered Rei's mind, he victoriously nodded in satisfaction and decided to, for once, listen to the imaginary voice in his head.
Sneakily jumping down into the clearing, Rei appeared straight in the middle of the three genins. He had to give them credit where credit was due. The two boys instantly went rigid for a moment before abruptly turning around, prepared to fight for their lives while the girl was much sneakier about her intentions but that probably came with being a genjutsu practitioner.
Rei didn't give the kiddies a chance. He kicked a small stone into Zaku's gut, making him bend over and slightly fly backward from the sheer force behind the propelled stone as the air was driven out of his lungs. The boy was out of commission for the next ten seconds at the very least.
Dosu was fairly close to Rei so it was no surprise that during the three seconds it took him to deal with Zaku, the boy was upon him. He swung his melody arm at Rei... and then his eyes went wide in disbelief when Rei just caught the punch with his palm all the while negating the sound waves generated by the device. It was a clever but incredibly inferior and melee version of what Tayuya could do. Unfortunately for the boy, Rei had already seen that one once.
Dosu didn't get the chance to realize where his attack failed as he promptly felt a sharp pain all around his body before finding himself engulfed by darkness and going out cold.
Rei calmly observed as the electrocuted body of the boy impacted the ground with a thud, shaking his head, "This is why having a special attack relying on melee combat is bad when you are not an impressive melee fighter yourself." He said, not really bothered by the fact his advice would fall on deaf, or rather, in this case, unconscious ears.
Rei nonchalantly turned towards the still wheezing Zaku who was kneeling on the ground and glared at him in deep hatred...
Oh, yeah, the Kin-girly was flinging senbons at Rei all the time but he was simply using the wind release to bend the air currents around him, making all senbons miss their mark. Alas, the girl was a sound-based genjutsu fighter but after seeing Tayuya's proficiency in this new approach towards genjutsu, Kin was simply shit at it.
The sound was just the vibration of molecules in the air.
IN. THE. AIR.
It really had no chance against someone who mastered Wind Release and knew how to counter it with it. That's why Rei insisted on Tayuya learning how to create shockwaves through a bastardized version of her sound manipulation. That could not be countered so easily when playing with the big boys.
Zaku weakly tried to defend himself and raised his shaking arm towards Rei, releasing a wave of pressurized air at him... only for it to divide towards left and right on some kind of invisible shield in front of Rei, destroying everything around but evading the real target.
"Your airwaves are powerful. Against genins and some low-level chunins. Unfortunately for you, there is no real potential for development in them since they are a result of a shoddy body modification experiment. I'd rate it 2 out of five." Rei answered Zaku's silent bewilderment, causing it to turn into anger...
But Zaku couldn't act on this newfound anger since his head abruptly felt as if it was spinning for a second before the world went black.
Rei subtly used pressurized air, filling Zaku's ears with it which affected his third ear in the brain and caused him to get a nasty case of motion sickness which knocked him out.
Rei was simply showing the boy why exactly the scientific way is not better in some cases. Sure, the boy could use pressurized airwaves to a devastating effect thanks to these tubes in his arms, bypassing years if not decades of wind manipulation training, but he could never hope to use subtle applications of them. Zaku could at best brute force it and hope for the best, sending one airwave of pressurized air after another.
Alas, that did not always work...
Rei slowly turned towards the last member of Team Dosu, who watched him with fear-filled eyes while shaking like a leaf in a whirlwind as the despair and hopelessness of the situation seeped into her mind... and pleasantly smiled at her.