A Bizarre Beginning

You know how most stories involving normal people getting sent to another world usually begin with the protagonist being run over by a truck and dying? That's how the legend of 'Truck-kun' was born, telling of an incredible and amazing vehicle capable of sending you to another world with a cheat power and the assured promise of a 'sweet love-love harem life' if you let it run you over.

I always thought that legend resulted in a few desperate Japanese shut-ins searching for a truck to jump in front of, only to be extremely disappointed when the driver stop in time or they wake up in the hospital later on, every year.

Me? One day I simply went to bed late after spending some time checking the links to my favorite fanfics for updates, only to wake up the next morning inside a different bedroom. A bedroom that was, I must stress because this is important, both unknown and for some reason completely familiar to me.

"The fuck?" I swore as I quickly threw away the sheets and sit up. I was quite understandably freaked out by the fact I didn't wake up in the same place where I went to sleep, but not as much as when I realized I just spoke with a voice that was not mine. I slapped a hand over my mouth, briskly pushed aside the realization my hand felt smaller than I remembered because there was only so much weirdness I could deal with at once, and looked around the room in search of anything that could explain what was going on.

Window next to bed. Same as before, but different curtains.

Desk with computer, manga and some games. Different position and PC's model, I was pretty sure that type of computer fell out of production seven or eight years ago. And the manga were... in Japanese? And somehow I understood the language as if it was second nature? Weirdness levels were rising, along with a few alarm bells because I know my tropes and the situation was hitting too many of them.

Another desk, this one with books, pens and other school materials on it. I knew I didn't have more than one in my room, yet I could distinctly remember doing most of my homework on it. Which is bullshit because I finished studying a long time ago, but also not?

A soccer ball. Something normal, when was the last time I-last saturday, when I spent most of the afternoon playing with Kenichi and the others.

Who the Hell was Kenichi?

Kenichi Saruyama, my only real male friend. We go to the same class. He is quite perverted and utterly without shame, but he's a good guy at heart.

That confirmed it: I have been Isekai'ed. With the body of someone else and his memories. In a Japanese setting.

Fuck.

No. No. I needed to calm down. Considering the current situation and its implications panicking was perfectly understandable, but right now that would do more harm than good. I could freak out about identity crisis once I was alone and sure no-one would disturb me. What I needed to do now was to remain calm and think rationally.

It was not going to be easy. Nowhere near it. But I was confident I could hold up for a little while, which hopefully would be enough time to avoid unfortunate questions.

First thing first: I needed a good look at my current face. I stood up from the bed, which to my dismay confirmed I lost not only a few years but also a few inches of height, and made my way to the first reflective surface within reach: the screen of the computer. I just needed to find the right angle for the light to reflect on and-

The face of an average-looking Japanese boy with unrealistic spiky brown hair and golden-brown eyes stared back at me with a panicked and dumbfounded expression. I raised a trembling hand and poked my cheek. The boy did the same.

I... I knew that boy. No, I knew who I have been Isekai'ed at: Yuki Rito, the main protagonist of the manga 'To Love-Ru'.

"You know, that my life was an ecchi comedy manga don't surprise me. It explains so much."

The sudden voice out of nowhere startled me, but it didn't take me long to recognize it. "Yuki... Rito?" I softly asked with an identical voice.

"Yes, that's me. Lee, right? Sorry for not speaking before, I had no idea why I was back in my old room with someone else holding the reins, so to speak. I tried moving but it seems I need your permission first."

"Oh... Okay." Being in the body of someone I once thought was just a fictional character, with said fictional character speaking directly in my mind was beyond strange, but at least I wasn't mistaken for a body-stealing parasite or something. "Do you know what's going on?"

"Not a clue. I don't have access to your memories, just your immediate thoughts. My best guess is some kind of time or dimensional travel travel mishap, it would explain why I'm-sorry, why we are a teenager again."

Dimensional travel? Zelretch? God I hoped not, almost all fanfics have him being a troll of epic proportions. I didn't need an immensely powerful and bored vampire constantly messing with my life just for fun.

Then something Rito said caught my attention. "Why we're a teenager again?" I asked while sitting back on the bed. "You also mentioned this being your old room..."

"Well, this may come as a shock but the last thing I remember before waking up here is dying." My eyes widened. "Of old age, don't worry. 87 years and I was still in good health, if I can say so myself. That's why I think I either traveled back in time or ended up in an alternate dimension."

An old Yuki Rito? I almost couldn't picture it, but it explained why he was relatively calm.

"Not to make you panic even more, but do you think this is some sort of really weird afterlife?"

I hoped not. Even if I couldn't remember how I ended up here, I think I would remember something as traumatic as my own death, especially since I was still young and couldn't have died of natural causes.

"Do you mind checking the calendar?" Rito then asked. "It's on the left side of my work desk, the one with school books."

That's right, knowing when I was in the timeline was very important. I stood up and approached the desk, picking up the small handheld calendar lying face-down. Turning it around I confirmed it was May of the year 2006, with the last day checked being the 3rd.

"May 3rd 2006... That's right, Lala appeared in my bathtub the 10th! Man, that was an event I could never forget... for a large number of reasons."

I found myself grinning. "First time seeing a live chick naked does that to people."

"Don't I know it..."

The small alarm clock I haven't noticed until now chose that moment to ring. Turning my head around I saw it was eight in the morning.

"You should probably start preparing: today it's a school day after all."

School... day? Oh, that's right: the Rito of now was still a high-school student. And so I was, I realized with a small amount of dread. "But I haven't gone to school for years!" I complained with what most certainly wasn't a whine.

"Neither do I, but I don't think we have much of a choice. You could school skip today I guess, but as someone who in the eyes of society is still a fifteen years old boy you must go to school. Unless of course you want to deal with people and especially the police asking questions, in that case I'm glad I'm just a spectator."

I hated that line of reasoning, especially since he was right. "I don't remember you being so witty, Rito."

"I'm eighty-seven years old, boy." He replied with a chuckle. "People change as they age, plus everyone is an idiot to one degree or another when they're fifteen."

"And you were a spectacular one."

"Touchè. Anyway, I think you have my memories of this time period? If you follow them you should be fine: just go wash up and have breakfast with Mikan for now, we can worry about the rest later on."

Oh. I was so caught up in the situation I forgot I was not the only person currently living in this house. How shameful, how could I forget about Best Lil Sis?

"Treat her well or I'm gonna get mad."

"Yes, yes. I'll be the best big brother ever." I replied with a grin while doing some stretching to iron out the kinks in my body.

Afterwards I did as Rito said and tried to willingly summon the memories of him as a student. It went surprisingly well, as if they were events that happened only recently. Once inside the bath I let habitual instincts take over and perform my daily ablutions before drying myself and walk down the stairs to the ground floor, where I was greeted by a delicious smell: Mikan was supposed to be an excellent cook, and now that I had the proof right before me I could say it was completely true.

Said girl was already seated when I entered the kitchen, quietly eating the food laid down on the small table. There was steamed rice, miso soup, grilled fish, pickles and a green salad. A small part of me wished for a more western breakfast, but everything smelled so good I couldn't find the strength to complain.

"Good morning Rito." The very cute twelve years old girl greeted me in a calm manner before going back to eating, hopefully missing how I completely frozen up, stunned at the sight of one of my favorite characters. I mean I saw a few realistic cosplay in the past, but this was the real deal: Yuki Mikan in the flesh.

Though that was not the time to fanboying over her, even if I really wanted to do that. "Good morning Mikan." I replied with a smile before sitting down in front of her. Now, Japanese people are really big on good manners and the like, right? I should probably start practicing getting into the proper mindset early to avoid making an ass out of myself, hopefully Rito's memories and assistance will be enough. "Thanks for the meal." I said while putting my hands together, I seemed to recall clapping is considered rude so I should refrain from doing it. Then I picked up my chopsticks and began moving portions of the food from the shared dishes on my own dish: it wasn't my first time eating Japanese, so I knew at least that much. Though I admit Rito's muscle memory was a great help when using the chopsticks.

"Mmh! This is really good!" I couldn't help exclaiming after taking a few bites. Rito you lucky bastard, you got to eat this every day? Somehow I knew he was grinning at me. "You're incredible Mikan!"

She blinked in slight confusion before smiling smugly, though in my eyes she still looked rather adorable. "Took you long enough to recognize my skills. That's right, praise me more."

"And in exchange I get to eat like this every day? You have a deal!" I cleared my throat before continuing with a purposely pompous tone. "My little sister Mikan is the best sister in the world. Not only she's cute and spunky, she's also an excellent cook too! Despite her young age she's very mature, if you are troubled she will always find time to offer advice-"

"Wait what?! Stop!" She yelped before pouting, a little bit of rosy pink coloring her cheeks. "Don't tease me like that! Geez, what happened to you Rito? You're acting weird today."

"Uhm. Well, you could say I woke up in a particular mood today." I cupped my chin while nodding, eyes closed and a smile stamped on my lips. It was even the truth from a certain point of view.

Meanwhile Rito was laughing.

====

After the frankly delicious breakfast (I'll say it again: you're a lucky bastard Rito) I got dressed in the Sainan uniform, picked up my school bag and, after saying goodbye to Mikan, left the house. It turned out the school wasn't located very far from the Yuki family house, but unless I ran it was still going to take a little while to reach it before the bell rang.

So I used the time to talk more with Rito. With some experimentation we discovered that not only I could access the memories of the Rito of this time period, but if I willed it I could let him access my own memories before the change. They were not exciting like his own memories, basically I was just a regular guy who had a average job and hobbies of playing games, reading manga and watching anime, but I felt it was an important step to build a rapport of trust. He treated me well despite having basically hijacked the body of his younger self, so it was only fair I paid him back the say way.

And then we reached my large mental library of hentai and smut.

"Oh come on! I know people make porn out of basically anything, my dad was a manga artist, but this-even my female self?! Eew! No. No. No way. No siree. Do not want, send it back."

'Don't be like that.' I said in my mind to avoid being seen as a loon by the other passerbys. I didn't know if I was successfully concealing my amusement, though. 'You were really cute as a girl. In a [girl next door] way.'

"Please stop, I can physically feel my inner pride as a man shriveling up."

'Fine, fine.' I snickered. 'So, you were saying that in the future you married both Lala and Haruna? What happened to the Harem Plan?'

"Eh, it was too much for me. Blame my Japanese upbringing or whatnot if you want. Plus the way Momo tried to push it was honestly a bit creepy, she didn't really manage to endear myself to it. Though, I confess some times I wondered how things would have went if I did go with her plan... Nah, forget this old man's ramblings."

'No, no. It's perfectly normal to wonder about what-ifs.' It wasn't like I didn't often think about what I would do if I was in another character's shoes. And now that it really happened... but maybe this was not a conversation to have while walking to school. 'What about the whole [Emperor of the Galaxy] business? Did you succeed Gid?'

"No, I was just Lala's consort. Though I ended up helping Miss Sephie as an official job: you wouldn't believe the amount of paperwork involved with ruling the whole galaxy. We had to do a lot of decentralizing to reduce everything to manageable levels."

I winced: that sounded honestly bad. I knew Gid ran away from most of his responsibilities, but it seemed there was more to it that just him being spoiled and perverted. Still, I couldn't say that becoming king of the whole galaxy didn't sound appealing to me, workload notwithstanding. But having the title handed to me just because of marriage didn't exactly sit well with me: it sounded too easy. If possible I would like to earn it fair and square... but that would likely involve defeating Gid Deviluke in a fight, and that was not something possible for me even with knowledge of the future.

A shame, really. If only I or Rito had some kind of incredible power-

BA-THUMP

"Uh?"

"Uh?"

I said together with Rito, both of us startled. "Lee, was it my imagination or did I really hear a second, much louder heartbeat within our chest?"

'No, I heard it too!' I put a hand over my chest, but all I could feel was the slightly fast but still normal beating of my sole heart. That, that was strange: I had no idea what just happened, but I knew something like hearing a second heartbeat wasn't normal. Then again, nor was waking up one day in the body of someone I only recently considered mere fiction: so for all I knew this was normal, but I had no way to confirm it.

"Yo Rito!" My thoughts came to a screeching halt when I felt someone slung one arm around my shoulders. Looking to the culprit I came face to face with a grinning Saruyama Kenichi. "How are you today buddy?"

"Ah, Kenichi: if there even was a pillar of normality in my teenage life that was you. As paradoxically as it sounds."

'Did you ever tell him the truth about [Riko]?'

"When we became university students: afterward there was a lot of awkwardness, a fistifight and alcoholic drinks involved. Eventually we both laughed about it and renewed our friendship, even if the rampaging hormones made him even less bearable."

Oh oh, now that was a story I wanted to hear. "Pretty good, thanks." I replied to Kenichi before the pause between question and answer could grow awkward. "Remind me again what we have in program today? My brain has yet to fully boot up."

"I feel ya, man! I stood up until late reading, so I barely had the energy to get out of bed this morning." He chuckled. "Don't worry, today the worst we'll have to deal with is the usual sleepy lesson of Honekawa-sensei." His voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper, his lips turning up into a mischievous smirk. "You'll have plenty of time to stalk your beloved Haruna-chan."

"Jerk. Even if he's not wrong: damn my idiotic teenager self..."

I agreed with him there: even if I knew Rito's intentions were innocent spying on another person while hidden is definitely stalking. Than again, I supposed such a behavior wasn't uncommon among boys experiencing their first crush.

"Who the hell are you calling a stalker?" I feigned irritation and pushed Kenichi away. Time to use one of the excuses I came up to explain my gradual change in personality. "Today it's not like other days! I have decided!" I pointed a thumb at myself while looking confident. "I'm gonna build up my confidence with the ladies! That way I'll be able to properly confess to Haruna-chan!"

That's right: teenhood is a delicate stage of an individual's life where both the body and mind undergo great changes. So if you say [I'm going to change myself], then people around you will think that the following changes are the result of both natural growth and you making an effort to behave in a way you feel is more appropriate.

I was such a genius!

"As long as we don't constantly get chased around by jealous boys I'm fine with it. Seriously, do you know how long tales of all those perverted incidents haunted me? All my life!"

Truly, being Yuki Rito was suffering.

"I can recognize sarcasm now."

I knew.

Upon hearing my proclamation Kenichi stopped and tilted his head, a puzzled look on his face. "And how are you going to do that?"

"...I'll think up of something." I replied lamely. Can't have the changes happen too fast or they'll be back to being suspicious.

====

I'm not gonna lie, while I read about Japanese school-life experiencing it for myself was something else. I was a western guy after all, so even with the help of Rito's memories the differences between it and my old school life were quite surprising.

For example, changing shoes before entering the school building proper: I almost walked past the lockers without changing before Rito called me out to remind me of it. That was a bit embarrassing, especially since I properly put my shoes before leaving home. Then there was washing my hands before entering the classroom and, when the first teacher entered, standing up and bowing in unison with the other students for the daily ritual greeting. It got glossed over in the manga and anime by all the bizarre hijinks, but Sainan High was supposed to be a proper, if unremarkable, Japanese school.

Except for the principal. Seriously, what was up with him?

"You're asking me? Back then there was not a day I didn't wonder how that guy constantly managed to avoid getting fired, arrested or killed from all the crap he pulled. He even survived getting beaten by Yami, and she once confessed to me she never held back!"

'Is that guy even human?!' I exclaimed in shock within my mind. I could afford to ignore the lesson currently going on, it was all stuff I already knew. 'Wait, what if he's an alien in disguise like Ryoko Mikado?'

"I thought the same, but after graduation I didn't have to see him anymore so any thought of investigation kind of fell to the side... Do you want to look into it?"

'Absolutely!' Maybe I could discover he had some dirty secret and blackmail him into being less of a creep-that suddenly sounded like an hopeless endeavour, why is that? But I must persevere! For truth, justice and Mikan!

"While I agree with all three points, especially the latter one, I can't but feel a little concerned..."

====

Six. And a half. Hours of lessons. With just a small pause for lunch.

Japanese schools are insane!

"Those who attend a club or cram school stay even longer."

"Quiet you." I hissed as I walked away from the hateful palace of torture, thoroughly drained in both mind and body. The thought that I had to repeat it six days out of seven for the next few years was almost enough to drive me to tears: they never mentioned Japanese school-life was so hard for a western guy like me in all the isekai and self-insert stories I read! That was unfair, that's what it was! "And stop laughing!"

Since I, as Yuki Rito, had neither clubs nor cram school to attend to I decided to simply wander around, distracting myself by taking in the sights of the city. Sainan Town looked just like I remembered from the anime and manga, but now that I was physically walking through its streets I realized it was a lot bigger than I once thought, with hundreds of people and dozens of vehicles moving around me. From Rito I also learned Sainan was located on the island of Shikoku, though to properly visualize it I also needed to receive a quick lesson about the geography of Japan.

Once I grew tired I stopped by a park and sat down on the first free bench. There were few other people around at the moment and the bench was somewhat hidden by a file of trees, so for now I could enjoy some quiet and privacy.

"So Lee, have you thought what you're going to do now?" Rito asked after a few minutes of rest. "I mean, yes we both have knowledge of the future but for all we knew this is an alternate universe and events are going to play differently. Not to mention there are some messes in the future I would like to avoid, so I don't want to just follow the stations of canon."

"Don't worry Rito, that was never my intention." I reassured him. He was right of course, there was no reason for me to just follow the script and hope for the best. I needed to plan ahead and prepare contingencies, or I would get completely blindsided by the first unexpected occurrence.

Again, things would be so much easier if I had some kind of superpower.

BA-THUMP

I stiffened. There it was again, the mysterious second heartbeat. "Rito?"

"I heard it."

BA-THUMP BA-THUMP

And now there were three of them!

BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP BA-THUMP!!!

Four, five, six... Ten additional heartbeats!? What the hell was going on here?!

"WHERE THE HELL AM I??!" A voice very different from Rito suddenly shouted within my mind. Then it was followed by other voices, all of them also shouting at the top of their lungs, which gave birth to an absolute bedlam right inside my own skull.

"Oh man, what is it now?"

"Who are you? Answer me or I'll kill you."

"If you really think you can intimidate me with a parlor trick then you're a fool."

"Alright, where I am and who do I need to blame this time?"

The last thing I remembered thinking before fainting is that I was glad no one was there to see me.

====

"Lee, wake up. You really need to wake up."

For the second time in less than twelve hours I woke up with no idea about what was going on, though this time I was greeted by a voice I recently became familiar with. "Uh, my head..." I complained while sitting up, only for my eyes to shot wide open when I realized I was speaking with my old voice.

And were those explosions I was hearing in the background? What the fuck happened while I was knocked out?

"Good, you're awake." I felt a hand land on my shoulder, and it was with understandable confusion that I realized its owner was none other than Yuki Rito himself, back in his old body and wearing the Sainan male uniform. Though his current expression was that of a grandfather who need to deal with a bunch of rowdy kids and seriously require help. "Now we can hopefully find a way to calm down the others."

"Preferably before they manage to kill both us and each other." Another voice said from the side. I turned my head, and the sight that greeted my eyes was so surprising I felt my mouth hanging wide open.

Minato Sahashi, Tsunayoshi Sawada and Rin Tsuchimi. The protagonists of two manga and one visual novel I knew very well were standing before me: the first two looked clearly worried, while the third was exuding the calm and confidence of Future Tsuna despite being fourteen years old.

My day had just reached a completely new level of weirdness.

"Alright, let me begin by saying I know who each one of you is. What I don't know is what happened after I blacked out." I stood back up on my feet and looked around. "And where we are right now."

We were in the middle of a decorated hall straight out of a fantasy castle, but one so wide it could have held a whole army. The ceiling stretched so far above it was hidden by clouds, as far as I knew it didn't even exist and the pillars as big as skyscrapers rising up from the floor and disappearing into the clouds were not holding up anything. I could see walls in the distance, and what looked like giant doors.

"Good question." Tsuna replied, eyes briefly flashing with the orange of Sky Flames. "This place doesn't feel real, but it's not an illusion. I believe this is an inner world created within a mind or a soul. It would explain how we're able to meet and interact with each other since I feel none of us are currently occupying a physical body."

Was that the famous [Vongola Hyper Intuition] at work? Neat.

"Before you woke up mister Yuki explained to us about the events that preceded our meeting." Tsuna gestured to Rito. "The circumstances of mister Sahashi, mister Tsuchimi and myself are identical: we arrived here after dying of old age, and from your earlier words I guess our respective lives were also portrayed as a fictional work of art in the world you came from, mister Lee."

"Just Lee is fine. At this point it's easier if we use each other's name." Something blew up in the distance. "Now, what about the explosions?"

"That would be the six other people that appeared here with us." Minato grimaced. "They jumped straight to violence."

"Since all hints point to this inner world belonging to you we were hoping you can do something to calm them down." Rin continued.

A beam of flames rose into the distance, followed by some kind of wave that cut straight through a pillar.

I winced. "How strong are we talking about?"

"Making a comparison with Dragon Ball..." Rito assumed a thinking pose. "Two of them can fit in the Z series, though I have no idea if they're still holding back or not. The other four are more end of the first series."

I winced again. "Dude, needing to use Dragon Ball as a measuring stick is already terrifying on its own. No need to pour salt into the wounds. Do you recognize any of them?"

"Two of them are fictional characters in my world too... But it's probably better if you see it for yourself." Rito pointed a thumb behind himself, where the sounds of conflict where coming from. "It's a scene straight out of Jump Super Stars."

"Of what?" I asked, having never heard of it.

"The Jump Stars games were never serialized outside of Japan." Minato added. "Basically it's a fighting game featuring popular characters that appeared on Shonen Jump."

"Oh, I see." I nodded in understanding. "Well, let's go: hopefully I can really do something."

====

We approached the battlefield while using the pillars as cover, though once I was close enough to see all six fighters I realized they were too busy with each others to pay attention to their surroundings.

Up in the air Laharl from the first Disgaea game was fighting someone in red armor I recognized as the Scale Mail form of Boosted Gear, which probably made that person Issei Hyodou.

On the ground, meanwhile, Sasuke Uchiha from Naruto was fighting Killua Zoldyck from Hunter X Hunter, the two boys firing lightning bolts at each other like they were going out of style.

Finally, also on the ground but a little to the side, Riku from Kingdom Hearts and Ranma from Ranma ½ were jumping around like crazy grasshoppers while exchanging blows of various nature.

I was seriously starting to question my sanity.

====