Girlfriend

I never would have thought that I could get so hurt over the word girlfriend, looking back how did I not notice that? Why did I actually care about what my emotions wanted? I should have ignored them so I wouldn't be in so much pain now. It hurts, help me, please. My heart feels like it broke into a million pieces and I can't breathe, my eyes cry huge amounts of tears that you could end up calling an ocean. why do I do this to myself? and it's just because of the word girlfriend, how funny.