Chapter 6: Probation: Contacts & Springtime

People want romance; I get it. There will be some, but much later on for those who are happy with this story as it is(And also because I have little to no idea of how to write romance which means I need time to plan for it). The romance will be in the Shippuden time. And no harems.

The first section of this chapter was horrible to write and it's probably awful. To make up for that and the wait, here's three sections, more Juugo and a new character(OC, please don't kill me...)!

Probation Month No.3

Contacts

It took Anko two weeks to finally get back and apologise. The incident had...confused me. I am not the type of person to get angry, in whatever manner. I wasn't afraid of her. But I was scared of what memories would be forced to surface in the future. Some of the operating table episodes are clear of emotion like all my other violent ones, but that was because those procedures were to determine my control and the effects on my bones, so I was using my Kekkei Genkai. Some, however, I had my chakra sealed deep so I couldn't use it, because they wanted to see how far I would go in terms of loyalty, how far they could push me - I managed to keep up my 'Orochimaru-zealot' persona throughout, thankfully. I buried those memories as deep as I could.

I know better than to repress them, so I don't. At least, I think I'm not repressing them. I bury them deep and when I get a chance, I take them out again and I look them over. I make sure I'm alone, so they don't see me cry. Because it's at those times I let myself cry for the peaceful life I once led and the family and friends I left behind. I started forgetting things long ago. It's part of the reason why I sing those songs. The songs remind of the good things and help bury the bad memories as well. All I have left now are those songs, recipes, bits of pop culture, some fiction books, the maths, little bits of landscapes and stupid trivia, just the names and faces of family and close friends and a few funny stories that I sometimes dredge up to help me laugh again on the nights I decide I want to remember.

I haven't found the time to do that for a while. The snakes dredged up a little bit of one of those bad memories, because I wasn't expecting it. Back in the bases, Orochimaru would send his summons after you if he wanted you for anything; so it wasn't anything really to panic over because that was normal. I wouldn't have panicked quite as visibly and certainly wouldn't have passed out if I had been in there when I was restrained by summon snakes. I would still have reflexively grown the bone under my skin; it became necessary when they started doing 'loyalty sessions'.

But this was Konoha; safe. So when I was suddenly attacked by snake summons, all I could think of was that I had been found. I was unable to compose myself because of that, hence the oxygen deprivation.

It's weird. I forget normal things about my old life, but anything about the Naruto series I remember quite clearly. The actual show, different fanfictions, trivia...

I think I only remember those bits because they link to the memories from my current life. They're relevant, so they haven't been shunted aside to make space for new memories. That's my theory anyway.

If I said I didn't like morbid practical jokes like Anko's, I'd be a hypocrite. I am very amused by the looks of horrified incomprehension I get whenever someone sees my Kekkkei Genkai for the first time. Especially if they're squeamish. And there have been a few times when I may have made the act of breaching a bone(or several) from my skin slower than usual, or given a running commentary during it.

So, I get where Anko was coming from and compared to what she could have done, it was pretty tame. So yes, I will forgive her. But I'm going to make her owe me a favour, then I'm going to cash it in.

The actual meeting...started out fairly awkward. I already hashed out the plan with Juugo, but he's still looming over me protectively. I know that Kakashi/Hound and Tenzo/Bear are lurking somewhere close, but that's because that's just their job.

Anko has a younger(and slightly pissed-looking) Kurenai Yuuhi with her, but I can't tell if she came along because Anko wanted moral support, she wants to make sure Anko apologises, someone else told her to go to make sure there isn't another incident, or she's just interested. Personally, I think it's a combination of the first three, with the last as a bonus.

Anko bows to me as soon as I open the door.

"You can stand up," I start with. "I'm getting backache just looking at you. Would you ladies like to come inside so we can settle this over tea like civilised people?"

The four of us end up sitting on the sofas(both bought at a bargain from a junk shop, but not a matched pair). It's when the tea starts getting passed around that the ice is inadvertently broken. Kurenai looks at her spoon and says "What the hell are these made from?"

I shrug. "We didn't have room in the budget for a cutlery set, so I made some from my bones. They're very durable. And it improved my control."

They both look at me with an assessing gleam in their eyes. "So it's true," Anko breathed. "The bones come out of your body." Yeeeaaahhh...we're getting off topic. I shrink back slightly so I'm stuffed between the sofa and Juugo, who's sitting next to me, who growls quietly at them. Either Anko realised where this conversation was likely to be headed, or Kurenai sent some sort of discreet signal to her to back off, I don't know, but she shuts her mouth and stares morosely into her teacup.

I paste a 'I'm so cute' look on my face; "I don't like we've been properly introduced yet, have we? I'm Kimimaro Kaguya, the big guy next to me is Juugo of the Scales, and the two ANBU watching us go by Hound and Bear."

Kurenai does the introducing and once she's done, I don an 'innocent little shit' expression. "So, now that's out of the way, isn't this the point you tell me what in Tobirama's fluffy jacket you were thinking two weeks ago?"

Both women take a second to process what I just said and seem torn between questioning amusement and embarrassed remembrance. What? If I use insults like that, they're forced to think about what I've just said, which distracts them. Inoichi may have found that hilarious.

So, I cut in with "Let me guess. Likes pranks, knew about my previous affiliation with Orochimaru, decided to 'welcome' me and it didn't go as planned, because you gravely miscalculated the nature of that affiliation?"

Kurenai whistled, even as Anko became more drawn. "You don't mess around, do you? Alright then, what's she got to do to make it up to you?"

Well, that was a prime example of cutting the bullshit. Oh well, time to bite the bullet. "You," I say, pointing, "are going to be our mutual friends in introducing us two to various shinobi, I don't really care how." Carefully calculated confused looks. I let myself relax, let all the tension in my body drain. "Look, I...we, need friends; people we can interact with with minimum awkwardness. We just need somebody to do the introducing."

Kurenai smirked at a relieved Anko. "See? All you have to do is drag them to a bar and start a drinking game. Like a date; except you don't drag him back to your place afterwards."

"I sincerely hope not" I deadpan. "For starters," I gesture to myself, "nine-going-on-ten! Haven't even hit puberty yet! Secondly, not interested! No hormones! The only legal males here are the ANBU, and I don't even know if both or even one of them is straight or otherwise attracted to women!"

I'm...just going to leave out the part where the two ladies dragged us to a bar and we accidentally crashed a promotion party, which led to somebody spiking my beverage which was meant to be non-alcoholic and I got slightly tipsy. I'm what's known as a lip-loose drunk, so when Anko asked what life under Orochimaru was like for me, I ended up spilling some of the nastier, more disturbing stories along with the more lighthearted-slash-edited ones I was reserving specifically for such an occasion. Since shinobi are nosy by nature, I think I killed the mood for everybody. Oh, and I think I saw some clan shinobi in the crowd; Akimichi and Inuzuka definitely and I swear I saw at least one Uchiha fan. Then everything got really fuzzy, but I managed to cut out any mention of my past life as well as some of the more personal bits of this life so far from my word vomit.

Then I either passed out, or someone knocked me out, because next thing I know, my body clock wakes me up at the usual six o'clock with a raging headache and a concerned Juugo hovering about. It soon becomes obvious he's never dealt with hangovers before, either his own or somebody else's. His well-meant and really very sweet offers of various things are hard to turn down politely, because of the aforementioned headache and the fact that I haven't had my morning dose of tea yet.

I know that hangover headaches are actually from dehydration and if I had been expecting to drink, I would have drunk a lot of water alongside. Well, I make sure to drink a large glass of water anyway, along with a couple of store-bought domestic pain-relievers, and start frying a pack of bacon for breakfast sandwiches. I really, really don't care if you're not supposed to have sandwiches for breakfast.

Somehow, I know at least one of the ANBU is drawing amusement from my plight. I bet it's Ka...Hound.

Noticed

After Kimimaro first found him, Juugo had a chance to notice things while they were on the road together. He didn't know what shinobi were supposed to be like, so he didn't have a baseline to compare behaviour to.

He did notice while they took a quick bath in a river, that while Kimimaro wasn't particularly body-shy ('shared showers up until puberty', he'd said once), he went stiff and silent whenever he saw Juugo looking at his scars.

He had lots of scars. Juugo had some too, from whenever he'd scraped or banged himself on rocks and branches; old, ragged things that he had no reason to be embarrassed about really. Kimimaro's were different; straight, thin and smooth as if someone had slashed him with knives without actually aiming to kill or wound and healed him professionally afterwards. The most prominent was a Y-shaped affair across his chest and torso. The smaller scars he only noticed later, hidden as they were by the calluses on his hands; tiny creased things on his fingertips that looked like bite-marks. Not like they'd been chewed in anxiety or fear, like they'd been torn open purposely to draw blood.

Konoha was so busy, at first Juugo thought they'd never find their way around. A fear that was slightly unfounded, as he soon learned where the main places were and the fact that Kimimaro had showed him how to channel chakra to his legs meant that he could jump over the rooftops; if a little more cautiously than some of the shinobi he saw.

Kimimaro seemed to relax once they had been given an apartment to live in and it was only that his paranoid younger friend did so that enabled Juugo to really relax himself. Even so, the numerous people around him kept twinging in the edges of his mind like burning torches. He thought that was normal for shinobi and other people with active chakra, until Kimimaro explained that he was a 'natural sensor-type'; that he was one of a few people who felt the world like that and until they figured out how to train it, he would keep feeling the burning lights in the back of his head, unless of course those shinobi were suppressing their chakra.

After that explanation, the lights of the two invisible ANBU became abruptly dimmer. At first he had panicked that something had happened to them, until a white-masked figure had revealed itself and explained in short, clipped sentences that they were keeping a lid on their chakra so as not to distract him too much. After that, Juugo felt less uneasy about them and not just because their chakra signatures were less bright.

A few weeks after they arrived, Juugo got his first good look at one of the Clan heads. It was the scarred one with the ponytail; 'Nara clan', Kimimaro said, 'highly intelligent but usually unmotivated'. He had come to drop off Kimimaro's medicine and his white-haired companion, with oddly polite and stiff manners, invited him in for tea. Shikaku Nara had engaged him in conversation as well as Kimimaro and Juugo thought the man kind and honourable, if a little apathetic.

Kimimaro was always so mature, so in control, it was shocking when suddenly he did things that made Juugo realise that he was only nine years old; younger than him!

He'd wake up some mornings and, on the bed next to his, Kimimaro had wrapped himself up tight, head buried under the duvet cover. If somebody asked why he randomly broke out smiling, he'd just clam up and mutter 'secret'. One day he came home from the shopping and instead of apples, brought out a large bag of blueberries with childish glee.

And then Kimimaro got drunk and what he said abruptly reminded Juugo that, sometimes-childish nine-year-old he might be, he had survived horrific things while having to smile through it.

Chinsei, in his own canine way, agreed with Juugo that these childish outbursts were good. Not that his usual sarcastic temperament was fake, it just seemed less vibrant and real and recently Kimimaro had seemed more tired. So Juugo promised himself that he would try and make Kimimaro happy more often; the real sort of happy.

Springtime? More like April Showers

You know, Gai's green suit isn't as much as an eyesore in real life as it looked animated. That's because it...all of the standard-issue bodysuits actually...aren't spandex. Because really, no way would spandex stand up to any of the shit shinobi get put through. Even in my previous life, that was one train of thought that led to thoughts of dripping polymer fibres oozing and fusing with the cracks in burnt flesh. Because although spandex was the go-to for sportswear of all types(and various underwear items, who knew?), it is flammable, melt-able(?) and goes saggy and thin the more stress it's put through. Also, spandex is bloody expensive here.

Well, despite it's faults on a battlefield, spandex is stretchy, making it a viable investment. So shinobi bodysuits are a blend of a small amount of spandex and jute fibre, making a canvas of sorts. Of course, this means that the suits are made of panels, not one seamless garment. Line with cotton, dye it a colour(dark blue is the standard, obviously), then treat with a chemical bath to make it fire-retardant. Voila.

To conclude, green pseudo-canvas doesn't look nearly as hideous as green spandex would.

And somehow, this line of thought turned into a brief discourse on textiles. God, what is my brain?

Well this line of thought started because I got introduced to Gai as part of Anko's apology. He was (very)enthusiastic about the chance to develop my fighting style. I guess that line of thought went off on a tangent because I am currently face down in the dirt and I think my brain is in the middle of rebooting.

Gai's style is very much about the amount of blunt force trauma he can inflict in a single blow from what ever limb and how to get in position to strike. What little style I have so far is a bastard mix of taijutsu and bone-kenjutsu that's a bit like a dodge-orientated Gentle Fist. However, Gai is just way above me in terms of skill as well as experience. Hence the face down in the dirt bit.

If that weren't bad enough, my ass-kicking has an audience. Anko and Kurenai I kind of expected, but it seems like half of the shinobi population is watching and exchanging bets. I think I'll just stay face-down for a few more seconds; spare myself the humiliation of knowing how many people won the bet about me eating dirt. Repeatedly. It's not like I ever expected to beat Gai, especially in a taijutsu only spar, but the extent and variety of the bets are starting to get on my nerves. Even Gai's looking a little disapproving. Which for a guy so cheerful, is a bit disconcerting.

Someone walks over to me and prods me in the shoulder. "Hey, kid, you want to carry on or do you want to quit for the day?"

I muffle some passive assenting noise that can basically be interpreted as 'let me think a minute'.

"Look, just quit okay? I've got money riding on you giving up."

Hmm. Pissed-off levels rising...

"Oh, come on. I mean, it's not like...'"

Juugo bit his lip as he stood on the side lines of the training field. "He really shouldn't say those things," he said out loud to the tight knot of spectators standing a few feet away. "Kimimaro's getting angry."

"Should we be worried?" Somebody asked, an Inuzuka. His two canine partners lay on the grass next to Chinsei, the three of them seemingly holding a conversation in their own language. Juugo considered the question for a moment.

"I don't know. An easy way to tell if he's angry, is that he starts sprouting bones without realising, but he's working on that. He's pretty collected, but I've never seen him really angry." Then, because making people weirded out seemed fun, especially if it was all the truth, he added; "Kimimaro says he's never completely lost it, so he's not entirely sure he didn't inherit any berserker tendencies from the rest of his clan."

The Inuzuka paled. "Berserker? Ooooh, shiii...'"

He was cut off by a strangled yell and a loud crack as the heckler had his shin snapped and took a kick in a place that had every male wincing in sympathy. The unfortunate man's feature faded and the pile of earth in his place and shape crumbled into a heap on the ground. Doton bunshin.

Kimimaro stalked towards the line of spectators, the bony manifestation of his anger clearly visible. By the time he reached them, he had calmed down a little; he was smiling genially, but there was still a slight tenseness in his shoulders.

"I'm having my lunch," he announced. "After that, I shall carefully consider whether or not you get afternoon entertainment as well."

Without further ado, he strode over to the tree Juugo was standing under. Juugo handed him the sealing scroll he had been asked to hold and from it, Kimimaro unsealed two bento boxes.

"You have horns," the Inuzuka said bluntly, after a minute or so. Kimimaro put down his chopsticks and reached up to his head to feel.

"Huh. Thought my head felt a bit heavy. What sort of horns are they?" He asked.

"Uh, kinda like a weird cross between ram and deer antlers; curly with ridges, but you've got prongs coming off...Does this usually happen?"

"The horns, or beating up people who annoy me?"

"Your friend explained the horns, so...did you know that was a bunshin? Because if you treated it like you would a fellow shinobi, that doesn't say good things about your restraint."

Kimimaro chewed and swallowed a mouthful of pickle before answering. "Knew it was a bunshin; from where I was face down on the ground, feet didn't look quite right. If I had the money, I'd bet that somebody was trying to rile me up on purpose and I feel very smug that I didn't lose it." He nodded at the Inuzuka. "Sorry, Kimimaro Kaguya, by the way."

The man grinned. "Mao Inuzuka," he replied as he reached down to scratch the ears of his partners. "Sumimaru is brown-with-black-patches here and Ashimaru is long-legs-pale-brown-and-skinny."

"Juugo," Juugo piped in. "No family name, but people have called me Juugo of the Scales. And this is Chinsei." The now-adolescent white dog yipped when he heard his name.

"That's quite the nickname you got there," Mao grinned. "I've been called Snapper by my kaa-san in the past, but somehow I don't think it'll catch on. Hope it doesn't, anyway."

"Could be worse,"Kimimaro grinned. "You could have a stupid real name. My name literally means shaved eyebrows."

"You're kidding me."

"Nope. Never knew my mother and my father was a batshit crazy basket case; of course he sucked at naming."

Mao's brow creased a little. "Batshit, huh?" Then his face cleared. "Know any other stupid names?"

"Uhh...Madara Uchiha, co-founder of this Village; name means Speckles, though I doubt he wrote it that way."

Mao tried to gasp and snort in amusement at the same time; the end result being a hacking wheeze that made his nin-hounds nose up to him in a questioning manner. He brushed off their curiosity with answer in the canine tongue.

"Sorry...sorry about that. But anyway, I know a Jounin called Kakashi and you know Anko Mitarashi. My Clan Head's name is Tsume Inuzuka, but that's not a stupid name, just scarily appropriate."

"She was on our evaluation committee, wasn't she?" Juugo pondered aloud.

"Yes, that's right," was the answer from Kimimaro. "All the Clan Heads were there and Yamanaka-san attends our weekly reports to Hokage-sama."

"Did he do your mind-walk too?" Mao asked, even as his partners nosed at the two strangers their shinobi was friends with. Kimimaro shook his head as he held out an open hand for the dogs to scent.

"No, My Kekkei Genkai makes it impossible for Yamanaka Jutsu to work on me, and nobody wanted to risk walking through Juugo's head since he's got all that nature chakra saturating his body."

A low whistle from Mao. "Handy. Nature chakra?"

"Partial stone transformation, temporary insanity, the markings...it added up over time. Means he can talk to animals too!"

Mao fixed Juugo with an interested stare, who dropped his head in embarrassment. "Really?"

"...Yes," was the soft-spoken confirmation.

"So, what do ordinary animals talk about?" The interest was clear in Mao's face. Juugo's face cleared.

"I mostly talk to birds and the odd squirrel, to be honest. Squirrels always ask me where's a good place to sleep for the winter, the smaller birds keep fussing about things, but raptors are the best at conversation because they go so many places...'"

With Juugo and Mao engaged in conversation, Kimimaro took the chance to look around. Most of the spectators had drifted away, some gone completely and some separating into their own groups to chat. Let's see...one or two more Inuzuka, a few possible-Yamanaka...at least ten Hyuuga, oh, there were a few Uchiha and that was definitely a Nara cloud-watching over there.

Gai walked over; calmly, the smooth walk a stark contrast to his usual enthusiastic run/jog.

"Please Accept my Apologies!" He boomed. "I did Not Expect my Comrades to Act in such an UnYouthful Manner!"

"It's okay," Kimimaro sighed. "Nobody got hurt and I think I made my point, but thanks for saying something anyway."

"You are Aware that You have horns?"

"Yep. So, do you have any pointers on my style?"

"Of Course! You must remember...'"

Next Time:

Tea Like Civilized People

I open the door and standing outside are probably the last two people I'd expect to show up unannounced; even Pain himself was more likely!

Relapse and Biscuits

I looked down at the forest floor out of one eye, the other sealed shut by dried blood from the gash on my forehead. Then someone grabbed me by my jaw and wrenched my head back until it collided with the trunk of the tree and my vision blackened at the edges.

I think of the shinobi uniforms as being like the ones from the Naruto stage musical. Feel free to review about what you think will happen next chapter.