if only..

If only I could get out. If only I wasn't faking. If only I could get used to it and stop being a wuss.

If only I could be in the warm air for once instead of this cold water. I'd love to just be able to

stand up there with them. But instead, this cold water seeps into my clothes and skin, making it

all damaged and frozen. I don't know how long i've been here now. But, my legs and arms are

tired and sore from all of the swimming and desperate attempts to stay afloat, or to at least stay

somewhere that's not as deep so I can maybe sleep. It doesn't help that this is built like a pit

though.