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Chapter 30.

Oh my god.

I didn't notice it when I woke up due to all the external stimulus and distractions, but I really must have gotten laid. This is the only possible explanation. There is no way while I was asleep I broke through to become a 5th realm semi transcendent. This isn't the same as the mortal realm, right? There is no way someone can break through within one day just from normal sleep. It must be a result of my wife!

"My darling wife, my cultivation has advanced. I can only thank you from the bottom of my heart. How about we dual cultivate every night?"

"Husband, you do know dual cultivation is just a fabrication, right?"

"What? No no no. How can that be my wife? Am I not the evidence that it is true?"

"Husband, I understand you want to be merry every night but dual cultivation really is a scam."

"No way… really?"

"Yes it is."

If I could see my wife's fingers crossed behind her back I would probably die from regret for naively believing her words so easily. I was unaware my wife was saving it for when I was at a higher realm to help me with breaking through. Naturally I was also completely unaware of the truth of the events that transpired last night.

If I knew the ten rounds she was talking about was the ten hits on my head with a brick, I really don't know what hole I could hide in that would be deep enough to bury myself within to cry away my sorrows.

"Haah, how can such a wonderful dream be false?"

I was grasping at straws as I pleaded, "how can we know for sure without more testing? My wife, perhaps there is some truth to it?"

"There is none whatsoever."

"Then how did I break through?"

"I would like to know that more than you, trust me I really would."

"There is something in this world that my wife does not understand?"

My wife said with distant eyes, "there are many things in this world that are incomprehensible."

"You have gotten a lot better at posing my wife."

She said with a cute posture while tilting her head slightly, "my husband likes to pose so why can't I?"

I love my wife even if she does tease me to death. Her words although scary at times always seem to make me feel happy deep down. Isn't she a bit too good at this though? She was single for two billion years.

"Wife you seem really experienced."

"I have a master who is renowned for her abilities in matters concerning the heart. She taught me plenty while I was under her. Really. A lot of things. Hahaha."

It felt like there was a story behind it and I wanted to ask her about it but her eyes told me not to ask. I suppose there is some use to the system after all.

The things she doesn't want to tell me, I can fetch them from the system.

I decided I would secretly look into it when I had some free time. If I knew that master was a goddess of the same level as my wife at this moment, I would definitely have made some excuse to use the washroom to pull up those scenes without hesitation. Ignorance is bliss though.

Being ignorant of her tutelage by that goddess master of my wife truly was for the best right now. It is best to save such material for desperate times. You could not possibly imagine just how amazing those memories of hers were though. However, that would be a story for a later date.

For now, it was time to turn my attention to the pressing matters at hand. Well, not so much pressing, but it was for the sake of my entertainment.

"Little wife, regarding the trial by fire that is going to be held. It should be starting today, right?"

"Now that you mention it. You're right. It is today. It looks like they are preparing to kick things off."

My wife walked over to me and grabbed onto my hand as she pulled me through a rift in space.

When we reappeared we were surrounded by a crowd of disciples all dressed in the sect's familiar white robes.

I scanned the crowd and quickly discovered the two main stars of the show that was about to unfold.

I really hope little Han heeds my words. Over the five days we spent together after the spectacular earth shaking event with the purple clouds I drilled quite a bit of knowledge into his head.

I reinforced the idea that love was not only a battlefield, but a war. I told him that he could not let one loss on the battlefield determine the outcome of the war.

I even taught him the secret technique push and pull; hot and cold strategic tactic number one. It was the tactic that I found was very effective on the little girl. I explained the various usages and times when it was best to put it into action. After five days of excruciating training he managed to meet the bare minimum of the requirements to use this legendary secret technique of mine. All this time he has only been using the pull and hot in the technique. He has never once gone the other way. Such a sudden change in attitude is sure to catch that little girl's attention.

Of course the entire time my little wife was constantly secretly rolling her eyes. While other times she would be stomping her feet in irritation as I continually deceived little Han with my venomous words.

If you don't want me to corrupt him, why don't you step in my wife? I know you are secretly enjoying it. No need to put on an act for me. I can see right through your act.

I've never told anyone before, but my eyes contain a great power. The power to see through all deception. The power to find all truths buried in lies. Yes, that is right. The power to see through all posers!

Such is the grand fate of this little husband. With great power comes great responsibility. I must never forget to use my power with discretion to not anger all men and gods across the realms. The wrath of heaven is not something I can face by myself just yet.

"Husband are you thinking about something pointless again?"

"I was just thinking about how beautiful you are."

I've learned flattery is gold with my little wife.

My LP points have accumulated quite a bit over the last few days as well. I'm presently at 540 LP. I feel like a rich man flaunting his wealth, but it's still nowhere near enough to get the good stuff. That one pill does leave me curious though. I really want to know just what kind of effects that little warrior pill has.

For some reason I have a suspicion based upon the other items in the list, but I really have no way to test it with my wife at the moment.

I'm really curious though. If what I think is true, what would happen if the patriarch used that pill?

Could it be some sort of divine miracle pill that can raise the dead?

I could not stop my gaze from landing on the patriarch who was standing with little Han, Sai Hitu, elder Hitu and my little disciple Chu Yue.

I guess the patriarch noticed my gaze. I could easily discern the slight shiver that went down his back when he turned to look in my direction. He had a stiff smile for some reason and nodded towards me.

Does he know about me? Did little Han slip or something? Well he is still a child. Naturally he probably cannot keep things a complete secret from his adoptive father.

His adoptive father has probably also been informed of some of his recent accomplishments as well. Oh well, that shouldn't affect my grand scheme to lord over the MC while I laze about doing nothing in the background as a master type side character. It is unlikely little Han would have leaked that he was the true cause for the purple clouds after my lecturing about the satisfaction he would get from slapping faces after being underestimated.

I taught him to make sure to bear with any sort of discrimination with gritted teeth and restrain himself until he was at the very peak of this world. Honestly though, who needs to teach him that? He's already been doing it the entire time, I just wanted to take credit for it.

(POV little Han)

That venerable master has been teaching me a lot of strange things over the last few days. His character has slowly changed in my eyes recently. At first he was cold, distant, and secluded from the mortal realm, but lately I've felt closer to him than my adoptive father.

I haven't been able to share my thoughts even with my adoptive father. Never before has my adoptive father taught me of the matters of love between man and woman.

That venerable master really is a guru of love though. That technique he taught me truly is terrifying. With that technique in hand I feel like completing the mission the system gave me is possible. Now it is time to accomplish task one by make my first move towards capturing Chu'ers heart.

Luckily it seems she still does not know that I discovered everything she said on that day. Even if everything was a lie, her anguish was brought on due to my existence. It is understandable she would want the pesky fly that was interfering with her love life gone. It really is too unfair for her. Her betrothed does not have eyes for another woman, but a man instead; isn't that reality too shocking for a girl in the springtime of their youth? Although I'm not one to speak considering I'm younger than her.

Recently though she has been excessively nice to me for some reason. It kind of feels like she is plotting something. It may just be my imagination though, but after that day she has appeared far more beautiful. I sometimes regret running away that day and wish I could know if something transpired between that venerable master and her. That is the only possible thing I can think of for her to be able to break through so rapidly.

But those were matters best left for pondering later on, right now I must follow through with that venerable master's push and pull; hot and cold stratagem number one.

I followed exactly according to his words not even deviating in the slightest. Whenever she waved at me I would coldly shun her and look the other way. If she smiled at me I would frown in displeasure. If she took one step towards me I would take two steps back. If she tried to greet me I would not greet her back.

After doing this enough it appeared to show effects. I would see Chu Yue looking off into space while dazed. She no longer appeared to be looking towards Sai Hitu like she had in the past. In fact she didn't even try to get close to him. It truly looked like that venerable master really knew what he was talking about.

Of course, if I knew she was constantly daydreaming about the very same venerable master I was praising to the skies in my heart I might die from frustration.

While we were gathered together due to the upcoming trial by fire, Chu Yue, who was standing next to me suddenly asked me in a hushed tone.

"Little Han, do you hate me now? Did I do something wrong?"

My godly guru in the ways of love, venerable master, it is exactly as you have said!

She suddenly approached me with a somewhat pained expression on her face.

Calm down little Han. Calm down. This is only the starting point. What was the next step master said would come after this?

Right!

"Not really."

Coldly respond like its not a big deal. Then what was next? Oh yeah.

Look up towards the sky with a distant far off gaze like you're remembering great hardships and then sigh while shaking your head while showing a pained and longing expression like you're hiding something but choosing to bear with it.

"Little Han, if I did something wrong, please tell me."

"It has nothing to do with you."

"Then can't you at least confide in your big sister about it?"

"Leave me alone."

Look at her coldly and reject her. Push her away as far as you can. Walk away from her with your back towards her and do not look back for a second.

Make it seem like she means nothing to you and that you are now strangers.

These are the words master told me.

It looks like it is working well. I can sense her gaze lingering on my back as I walked away from her and towards master's wife like he instructed me prior to this.

Flirt with another woman in front of her to make her understand what she has lost. Make her regret her foolish actions.

Great venerable master, you are my god! How can such a prodigy in the way of love exist?

It would be much, much later on that I would want to kick this "great" traitor of a "venerable master" off of a cliff thanks to his "great advise." The future me would definitely demand to be given back all the blood and sweat I poured into this damned act!

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