Life And Destiny

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know, I thought I was being quite straightforward."

To be honest, If only intent could kill, they'd all be dead already. Alas, now I had to do it myself, what a chore.

The mage's expression turned grave. He squinted his eyes, with his eyebrows following right behind, forming an arc similar to a groove.

"Are you saying that you're going to kill me?"

"Take it however you will, but you can't escape the reality that you'll die tonight."

Slap. Without any warning, he hit me across the face and my head flung towards the side. Even though I was just a frail girl, he did not hold back.

"I see you haven't learned anything," he said with a stern voice.

I slowly reached towards my swollen cheek and began to caress it. Meanwhile a short pause resided between us.

"Self hypnosis, have you ever heard of it?" I asked. When I stared at him, I saw a trace of confusion on his face.

"Of course not, it's not something the likes of you would know about." My gaze which was unfocused turned sharp.

"It doesn't hurt. As long as I tell myself that, my brain will follow my will. In turn, even if I bleed out, I break my bones, carve my flesh or scorch my skin, it will not hurt." The edges by my mouth curve up and reach towards my eyes, which were reflecting his face. A smile has inadvertently formed on my visage.

"It's similar to feeling numb. Would you like to give it a try?"

Without me realizing it, his face that looked confused at first, had already turned into disgust. His hand, just as it was about to connect to my cheek, stopped within the motion.

109 times. That's how often I've been in such a situation, some were similar, some were worse. That's how often I was close to die, to breathe my last. But in the end I didn't. Rather, it was those who had the upper hand that were strangled by them.

A long time ago in China, there existed a poison that even the gods feared. The poison was created by sealing countless venomous insects in a jar. Those in turn, with nothing to eat, will soon resort to fighting each other. Deadly venom is shot and injected while they gnaw on each other's bodies. After devouring everything, only one survivor is left. Instead of an insect, it has turned into a monster. That survivor has been concentrated with all the venom of it's foes. It is filled with the strongest, the most vile poison to exist.

Now, if a new round was to begin, and that deadly thing, after surviving once, was placed into another jar again, wouldn't the result be obvious?

The mage's eyes fell upon mine. Within I could see reluctance, angst and a brooding paranoia. I could tell, deep inside, he was nothing more than an insect ready to be swallowed by the survivor.

"Haha, you are actually being disrespected by the little girlie, how does it feel?," his friend with a ponytail asked, interrupting our small talk.

The mage faced him, and afterwards looked at me again. In the end, he clicked his tongue and began walking away.

Displeased, displeased. Even if he was, there's nothing he could do.

His blond friend, seeing the mage go, decided to follow him. Their footsteps crushing the leaves on the ground, and squishing the wet grass. The breeze caused by their movement rustled the dormant nature beneath them, resulting in a tiny pitch.

"Where are you going," the blond guy asked.

"Away for now. Let the captain deal with this girl."

"Wait, don't tell me you really are scared by that kiddo," his friend questioned.

"Of course not," he answered, balling his hands into a tight fist, "but that girl," he breathed out, "that girl isn't normal. She is crazy."

"How different can she be? She's still only a kid."

"Of course you'd say that. Actually I would think the same. However, you haven't seen her eyes. They are eerie. Their movement, their dilation. Her gaze, glance, glare," he stopped to breathe in again, "absolutely inhuman," he said.

"Well, I'm sorry if my eyes scare you," I replied.

My sudden voice surprised both of them, and after realizing that the duo has turned into a trio, they turn around at the time the strong gust started shaking the robust trees causing them to sway. Caught in the whirlwind, leaves that fell off, never reached the grass. Due to the air clashing with the grass, a ghastly note was played, resembling a whistle.

In the middle I stood, patting Estella's severed head, while the wind fluttered, my blood soaked garment, and lifted my hair.

I walked towards them, slow but steady, as one stared at me out of curiosity, and another out of confusion.

"What, can't I follow you?"

"No, you can't, stay put," The mage answered.

"Or what," I laughed, "are you going to hit me? I think that gimmick has aged already."

"Hey, let's just let her follow us. We have to keep our eye one her anyways," the blond guy chimed in.

"Why do we have to, it's not like she can run away deep in the woods, at night no less," he spoke and looked at me, "I'm sure she wouldn't have the guts to."

Was he challenging me? But he was right. There was no reason for me to escape, when there was an easier way.

"How about you just suck it up and let me come with you guys. It's quite boring sitting alone," but I remembered Estella, so I quickly corrected myself, "well, half alone."

In the end he gave up and uttered, "fine, suit yourself."

The walk itself was quite uneventful, as the reason they left in the first place was to avoid me. Now that I was following them, there was nothing to do. The mage didn't feel like talking to me, and I didn't have anything to say, so there was only silence and oxygen between us. Oh, and maybe a slow creeping dread.

It was the blond guy who ultimately broke the awkwardness first.

"Are you just going to hold on the head?"

Obviously, he was referring to Estella.

"Sure, as long as it hasn't started rotting yet, I don't see why not."

"Don't you feel weird, holding on to that?"

"Why should I be, she was the one who watched out for me, carried me in her arms, and then sacrificed her life for me. What was there to feel weird about? In fact, don't you think that is the least I could do, rather than let her die graveless in the woods."

"Ok, if you say so."

"I'm glad you understand then," I added as a closing statement and we continued walking around the woods.

It may seem like we had walked for a while, but we were in fact only drawing circles, as our sight never left the cave.

The corpses lying close to it, were in turn also visible. Some were barely distinguishable from lumps of flesh, while others were preserved well.

Staring at them, I couldn't help thinking about those guards that followed me.

How would Williams wife feel about his death—would she grieve or would she finally realize what he had been hiding from her?

Will Roberts relative survive without him under those harsh conditions?

And surely Lidra too, had someone he would hold dear. Maybe a family, maybe a friend, or maybe a lover, we will never know.?

Even in this age, death didn't only affect one. As Estella too, left a dent in my soul.

Death, just like a story, was anachronistic. Because at the end of a life, was the end of a story.

However, I might just be a special case.

This time, I felt like asking a question, "do you guys have family?"

Well, it was more like I was planning on asking anyways.

Really, it was all part of a plan, I did not suddenly feel like buddying up with the group that has taken my precious gem in this world.

Perplexed by what I said, the mage's friend stopped in his tracks, while he himself chose not to answer.

"That's a sudden question," the blond guy fell into contemplation, "but sure, I can entertain your thought."

"Go ahead, the stage is yours."

"Disregarding the place I came from, my social status and any other identifying parts, I can tell you that I have a younger sister."

For the first time, the black haired magician chose to react and yelled, "watch your tongue."

"Relax, I know what I'm doing. Sometimes you just have to lose that rigidness of yours," his friend rebutted and continued the story, "my sister is quite cute, I have to admit. I hear a lot of siblings would fight with each other. Something along the lines of vying for their parents attention, but my sister isn't like that. She's always docile and knows how to behave herself. Sometimes I even wish she was a bit wild, just so I know that she can be a normal sister," he kept on rambling.

"Fine, if you get caught, don't call me for help," the mage grumbled.

"What a coincidence, I too had a little sister, your description reminded me of her," I said.

"you speak as if it was in the past, is she dead, or what?"

"Well, you can put it that way," I smiled faintly.

"I'm sorry for your loss then."

"no you aren't."

"you're right," he responded and laughed.

"Anyways, she too was the silent type. Never causing trouble as she had too many responsibilities to bear. Even at a young age, pressure was applied on her, having to live her life with someone like me. It's for her that I lived my life the way I lived. Finally, it was because of me that she died too. If there's one thing I would wish for, is that she would have had a more normal upbringing and be a normal girl."

"It seems like we have more in common than I believed at first."

"I hope not." We kept walking. "By the way how should I address you two?"

He pointed at his head and answered, "just refer to us by our hair color."

"Alright then blondie," I said and glanced towards the mage, "you'll be Blacky then."

"Whatever."

"So, who actually wants to kidnap me," I asked, but didn't receive an answer.

"Is it somebody important? Do you have to keep me alive?" I continued.

Blondie responded with a shrug. Well, Okay then.

Another round of silence fell upon us.

While we continued strolling through the woods, a small white flower fell upon my eyes. At first glance, it's appearance may seem unassuming, especially in the night where it would be easy to simply walk past it. However, upon further consideration, one could see a hint of purple at the edges of its petals, making it look frightening under the dim moonlight.

Surrounding the flower were branches and boughs of nearby trees, and the thorns from shrubs sitting next, as if trying to protect it.

That ordinary flower resembled a wraith, stalking the night, as it swayed in the howling wind.

Slowly I walked towards it, avoiding the branches, and touch the stem with my cold, pale hands. Using a soft pull, I claimed it from the ground and as the roots left the earth, tiny lumps of dirt fell off.

I lifted the flower towards the moon, and a vague shadow left an imprint on my face.

Intrigued by my actions, the duo made their way to me and inquired what I was doing.

Without facing them, I answered, "did you know, upon being poisoned, a sense of impending doom will hit the whole body, alarming the host that it's about to die? It's as if the brain knows that death is imminent and tries to leave one last message in an effort to fulfill its duty."

I swirled the flower in my hand and the shadow that was on my face, began dancing on the ground. My gaze then fell upon the mage.

"the human mind is really peculiar. It takes in the information it wants, and interprets it to fit into whatever image it has. Everybody has that kind of bias, it's just the severity of it, which decides whether it is harmless or life threatening. For example, this toxic flower, " I exclaimed, and my gentle hands crushed the petals and the stem.

The flower, which was fully intact, crumbled and lied lifelessly on my palm.

With a soft blow from my lips, a gust of wind carried the shreds towards Blacky.

Surprised by what I did, his face turned somber, and he flung his hands harder than necessary, trying to avoid the remnant plant coming in contact with him.

As a consequence, he hit a branch covered in thorns leaving a small scratch on his left arm.

"Ouch," he blurted out.

However, before he was able to access the wound, I grabbed his wrist.

"Oh my, would you look at that. If you aren't careful," I grinned. "The wound might get infected, you know?"

A small shiver ran down his spine and his hand shuddered. Using a strong force, he pulled himself from my grasp and watched me with vigilance. I did not bother pursuing him and only said, "see, just look at it. Look what happened, doesn't it hurt," I pointed towards his arm.

All of a sudden Blackies arm started to twitch. Trembling and confused, he lifted his hand only to turn pale.

"What the hell did you do," he hissed. Soon, he fell on his knees. "Shit, my arm, my arm. Why, why is it swollen and blue," he exhorted and gripped his arms, leaving a mark.

"How is it, can you feel the sense of dread slowly creeping towards you," I whispered in his ear, and ran my finger through his arm, "do you feel the numbness and the acute pain intertwining in your wound and spreading?"

Seeing that something was wrong, his friend Blondie ran towards him, "hey, hey, what's going on, are you okay?"

The mage wanted to answer, but he was rendered speechless, instead with his other arm, he felt around his neck, and could only utter, "it's, it's reaching my head—Help."

Confused by what was happening, Blondie observed Blackies head but found nothing.

"I don't see anything, what are you talking about," he spoke hurriedly.

"Can't you see, my arm, it's color. Black, it's black and spreading like a curse," he groaned and touched his eye, "ugh, I can feel my vision fading."

However, no matter how hard Blondie searched, he couldn't find anything. "There's really nothing except for your gash, for real, you are scaring me."

I crouched next to the mage, and again my eyes met his. This time however, our roles had changed, now it was me who had the upper hand. I watched, as his pupils dilated and slowly lost its glimmer.

"Look again, your partner here is right, there really is nothing, " I declared.

The moment I said that, he stopped trembling. The desperate struggle he just had, disappeared, and without his rugged breath, it was as if nothing had happened in the first place.

Confused, he stood up, and with utmost care, he accessed his wound and saw only a small scratch and claw marks left by himself. It was neither black nor swollen, in fact, if no one paid attention, the wound couldn't even be seen. The pain had vanished and there was no numbness. His vision returned to normal, and the strength that left him, also returned.

His chest was rising and lowering rapidly and still in a daze he wondered what had just occurred.

There was never a problem to begin with. The shallow wound was neither infected nor poisoned. It was only his mind that let him to believe that. But he wouldn't know.

"What the hell did you do?"

I laughed.

"I said it already. You're already dead. Do you want to know why?"

It's because he wholeheartedly believed me.

His mind believed me that I want to kill him, and would twist the facts to fit the image, whether he liked it or not.