3 Episode 3 : First impressions are always unreliable

Onodera Haruyuki was currently in a dilemma.

No matter how he looks at it, he was reluctant to meet this person responsible for that problematic letter in his shoe locker. Even though he assured Ritsu that he would meet his so-called admirer, it didn't mean that he was eager. Seriously, what's with these kids wanting to date so early in high school?

The truth is he wasn't ready to move on. It has already been two years since he 'woke up' as he called it. Two years since waking up to a reality where he was no longer in his world with his friends and family. His beloved husband and their little boy.

God.

How he missed them. Oh, how he grieved. For his own death and his loss. But he knows he shouldn't remain in this state of mind; he has Ritsu to look after. In some ways, it helped him stay emotionally stable and feel incredibly guilty because he was using his twin as a comfort he shouldn't revel in.

He knows this. God, he was painfully aware of this. But never he will say that he regretted it. He would rather suffer the consequences than leave his brother alone and ignored in that house they called home.

Haruyuki was so distraught with his thoughts; he hadn't been looking to where he was heading and ended up bumping into someone before he had a chance to steer off course. The collision was so hard; he let out an unintentional yelp when both he and the person ended up spiraling into the ground.

"Off?!"

Luckily, he didn't hit his head, though his sore bum told a different story. Groans of pain were heard; while he's were out half of misfortune and self-deprecation for his lack of composure from his side of the floor. He should start taking his advice rather than giving them to Ritsu when it came to awareness because, with the amount of daydreaming he had been doing lately, he might as well find himself in a hole somewhere.

It didn't help that the commotion garnered attention from a few passersby. Some sporting worried expressions and a bit of... fear?

Before he could even question it, he was roughly grabbed by the front of his gakuran and suddenly found himself up to his feet, eyes connecting with stormy greys. In a blink, he could have sworn that he was staring in the face of an intimidating predator.

Oh. That's why.

He wished he was in that hole right now.

'I can tell I'm going to have a crappy day.'

"What the hell are you trying to pull?! Don't you have eyes!" The delinquent growled, scowling with great intensity shaking the poor paling teen.

"S-sorry! I wasn't paying attention. Really! It wasn't intentional!" stammered out, Haruyuki. At the look the guy was giving, he had to admit that he was at least a bit scared, but he stood his ground unyieldingly.

The delinquent held an unreadable expression with a long pause as his eyes dissected the person in his grip. The Onodera twin could only hold his breath and squirmed internally. Anticipation grew, knowing a beating was coming his way when abruptly, the other teen shoved him out of the way with a stumble.

"Tch, whatever." Without looking back, the stranger shoved his hands into his pants pockets and skulked away, leaving a messy, confused teen.

Haruyuki only starred at the afterimage of his departure. Shaking his head, he collected some of his belongings scattered on the floor, ignoring the other students who were gradually dispersing. He heard murmurs coming his way; a few caught on as he straightened himself to leave the hallway.

"Hey, wasn't that the fifth year?"

"Ando Itsuki right? I heard his family is from a branch of a big Yakuza clan in Kyoto."

"Ehh...that's scary."

Haruyuki ignored the rest. He wasn't fond of rumors but if they did hold some semblance of truth, he better hope karma was kind enough to grant him some leniency and just let it be a once-in-a-lifetime encounter.

Getting himself involved with a delinquent is just tempting fate after all. That, and if he wishes to keep was left to his sanity, then he better be more alert of his surroundings.

He could only grumble at the air-headed trait he inherited from his past life. The only good thing about this is it wasn't as chronic as it was used to be.

———————————————————————

"I love you...senpai..."

Haruyuki blinked. And blinked again. He wasn't sure it was possible but somehow...

He was a witness to his brother's 'accidental' confession.

He was currently hiding behind the shelves that his twin and the guy were on the other side. He was going on with his usual routine in the library when he saw them. Without thinking he just kind of... hide at the last second.

He got a glimpse of the infamous 'Saga' senpai his brother was captivated with; however, he didn't get a good look at his eyes as his long front bangs were to blame for that he could appreciate a good-looking guy when credit was due.

The reincarnated twin winced in sympathy as he listened to his brother's weak attempts to cover his mistake.

'Oh Ritsu...'

He thought of revealing himself, but he thought better of it. He wouldn't want Ritsu to panic even further. There was a reason his brother didn't tell him of this. If it weren't for the mangas, he was sure he would remain oblivious.

Well...not entirely

Anyone would be suspicious if his brother checked out those books under a different name. His temple produced a large sweat drop every time he came across his brother's 'name' written on the cards. And what's more, it was always the books that had the same name above Ritsu's.

Saga Masamune.

Heck, he wasn't surprised that person knew this as well. That's how transparent his brother is.

As he finishes at that line of thought, a flash momentary blinded his sights when a collective of images surfaces.

———————————————————————

Everything was pink and glowing, petals of cherry blossom blew in by a gentle breeze. The setting took place in a library that Haruyuki was well intimate with. He was silently watching ahead as he witnesses the scene unfold. It was different from what he'd seen just then. Now, he was fully experiencing a different atmosphere. As if he saw in the limelight, his heart thudded with anxiety and something else he couldn't decipher. There was an unmistakable sound of music filtering in the background. But the most surprising of all, somehow he could hear his brother's inner voice.

'Oh no...I spaced out. And I always made sure only to look at him from afar.'

Haruyuki watched speechless as his brother stammered with words, facing his crush, but it didn't seem to match what he was hearing.

'For the past three years of junior high and high school, all I've done is watch him.'

'This is the fourth year. I decided...I decided to keep these feelings hidden in my heart forever,'

'but once he was in front of me, my feelings started to spill over. I tried to keep them in, but they flooded out.'

'Senpai...I love you.'

'I love you.'

'I love you.'

Then everything was blanketed over with a bright flash of white.

———————————————————————

Haruyuki was back to consciousness when he leaned heavily against the shelf—gripping the board tightly until his knuckles turned white, panting for breath. Heart still thudding in his ears. He couldn't make heads of what he had just gone through. But he could tell the experience left him overwhelmed and shaken.

Thump. Thump.

"What's happening to me?" he whispered to himself in wonder.

And fear.

Thump. Thump.

It was as if he was experiencing what his brother was feeling.

"H-hey! Are you okay?"

Panicked and disoriented, his body automatically jumped and took an immediate flight response. He rushed past a concerned student before he could risk making any more commotion. It didn't come to mind if the unexpected episode had announced his presence to the two. All he knows that he had to get away. He could recall there was a shout in his haste, from who he wasn't sure. Because by then, he was already gone.

———————————————————————

Miserable. That's what Haruyuki was feeling right now. Tired and just plain miserable.

Later, he found himself curled against a washed old building behind the school and since had kept on berating himself for acting the way he did in the library. He didn't even find out if his brother was aware that he was there. He couldn't bear to what Ritsu would have misinterpreted him at that moment. An image of rejection in Ritsu's watery eyes came to mind, watching him ran out of the library like a scared little mouse, horrified of the truth unveiled by his twin.

It was heartbreaking because it couldn't be farther from the truth. And Haruyuki had himself to blame.

"Gahh! What's with the otome screen mode all of a sudden?! Have I finally gone mental?!" Haruyuki was still failing to grasp about the ordeal, furiously rubbing at his eyes in frustration.

Spooked as he was, he didn't care about the strange vision Haruyuki had nor the intense feelings he got from it. It was still unacceptable. Causing his brother's distress was a big 'NO' for him. Ritsu doesn't need this hanging over his head. The confession itself was making his twin vulnerable, and it was clear as day.

Unfurling himself, he laid sprawl out and slumped entirely against the wall. Still, in a daze, he slowly took out a small-sized sketchbook from his back pocket. One that he always kept close to his persons. The pages flipped in a furled rush until he stopped at a specific page, fingers languidly traced along with the texture and lines on paper.

The drawing wasn't anything special. It was detailed, and it held an ambiance that you could feel off from the subject. His twin's likeness enjoyed the peace and calamity; all the while had his head immerse within a book. Most people would have probably mistaken it to be a self-portrait.

Tilting his head upward, he watched the clouds move. The wind blew a gentle breeze causing his hair to flow and move in its direction—eyes glazed in contempt.

'What am I going to do?'

There was a long pause.

Steadily, he carefully analyzed his problem and made a final logical assessment in his head; To start with, he should go and find his twin and apologize. That's the appropriate action. He made a mistake; he should be the one to rectify it.

Resolute, he made to put his sketchbook away and stand on his own two feet. As he did, he was suddenly slammed against the wall causing him to gasp; the wind knocked out of him on impact. Then, he found himself boxed in by three towering over him.

"Horaaa~ what do we have 'ere?" The one with bleached hair responded in condescending glee. "A little lamb strayed into our turf."

The other two snickered behind glinting with mischief. Haruyuki shivered at the look the one with overly bleached hair was giving him. He could already deduce that he was in a deeply unpleasant situation.

"Look...I'm not looking for trouble. I was just leaving." Haruyuki managed to speak in an even tone, eyeing at his assailants warily.

"Oh hooo~ but looks like trouble found ya'." Bleach smirked and gripped tightly on the teen's front, almost lifting off his feet. Haruyuki struggled to get his hand off, but the grip grew tighter, and he found himself closer to Bleach head. "Now, how about this. Ya' cough up all of ya' lunch money and maybe JUST maybe we'll let ya' off for barging in our spot." Bleach grinned already nose to nose with his victim. "Consider it a fee."

Gritting his teeth, Haruyuki relented in defeat and gave a once straining nod. Satisfied, the newly dubbed Bleach head unceremoniously released his grip, causing him to stumble with a grunt. Unfortunately, as luck would have it, Haruyuki didn't have any since he usually kept his wallet in his school bag, which he forgot when he left the library in a rush. The only thing on him was his little sketchbook. He had to improvise then.

Haruyuki turned and made to reach into his back pocket when at the last minute he gave a mighty kick to Bleach head's shin. A pained yell and he was already running like the devil dogs chased him.

"Come back 'ere ya Bastard!"

'Not gonna happen!' was his mental answer.

The reincarnation dashed across campus, dodging and sliding under carried benches and avoiding near misses with other students. He didn't dare to look knowing that they were still on his tail. It helped slow them down when they stumbled and fell on obstacles he manages to avoid. On a split-second decision, he made a detour near the gym and went through the back door. He soon realized he'd made a substantial technical error when going through a narrow way between buildings and was met with a dead end. It was cliched in his opinion.

"Shit!"

Before he went to turn the other way, he knew it was over the moment he was roughly shoved and tackled to the ground. He gasped out of breath and in pain. He was pretty sure his ribs were bruised.

"Get off me Damnit!" He struggled with new vigor, but it was no use. He was done for. It still didn't stop him from trying. He could feel hands reaching to his backside trying to get a hold.

"Where are you touching?! Hands! Hands! You're getting way too handsy!"

"Shut the hell up!" Bleach head snarled and landed a punch on his stomach getting the wind knocked out of him. Haruyuki coughed out a pained gasp at the blow. He couldn't breathe. He was then hunched over in pain and vulnerable. All strength had left him, and he could only go limp as they continued their body search.

"Ahh...there's nothing on him boss!" exclaimed one of the cronies.

"Yeah, just this stupid notebook." Haruyuki watched bleakly when they fished out his sketchbook, but he remained silent even when Bleach head took hold of it and mindlessly flipped the pages.

"Tch. Useless." Bleach head threw the book behind him and glared down on his discontent with his raid. "Well, it ain't a total loss of boys." He then gave a nasty smirk, cracking his knuckles to emphasize his point. "We could still have some fun with em'."

Haruyuki struggled again, but he was really in a firm grip, unable to loosen their hold. The teen glared at his bully in defiance. Non-threaten, meeting him head-on. He wasn't going to let them beat him into submission. He won't give them that privilege.

Raising his brow amused, Bleach head moves forward to aim at the defiant teen's face. For Haruyuki, everything was moving in slow motion as he watched a foot came out of nowhere and done in the delinquent's whole left side of his head. Everything was set to an average pace when he was sent flying towards the concrete wall with a loud smack. The two cronies and the victim couldn't help but wince on impact. No doubt Bleach head was out for the count. Not to mention, he would be sporting a concussion.

Then, Haruyuki was wide-eyed. He was startled when he saw the face of his unexpected savior.

It was the fifth year he bumped in the hallway. There he stood, his stance unwavering and relaxed. His hands remained stuffed in his pants pockets as if he hadn't just kicked a guy in the head earlier. His eyes, on the other hand, told a different story. It was glinting with something fierce, turning those eyes in their direction.

"S-shit...I-it's Ando... We don't stand a chance..." one of the cronies stutter, both shaking in fear. Haruyuki couldn't blame them; he was also a bit wary. He had enough fill of delinquents in one day thank you.

When they saw the intimidating teen made a step forward, in a blink Haruyuki was unceremoniously dropped to the ground and was left to fend for himself. The other two made a run for it, leaving the scene of the crime.

Wincing in pain, he attempted to stand. His body creaked and ached all over, especially his front. His uniform was unkempt and dirty. Lovely, he will have fun explaining this to his mother.

After assessing the damage, he was then taken by surprise when a very familiar book was presented to him by the hand of his savior. Grateful, he carefully reached for the little sketchbook and inspected it for abnormalities. Haruyuki smiled, feeling warm and content that his sketchbook was undamaged.

"Thank you...Senpai..."

He bowed in respect, showing his gratefulness to the unexpected teen's aid.

"..."

"...It wasn't for your benefit." finally Ando spoke. "I just hate trash littering my way."

"Still," Haruyuki smiled genuinely in reply as he straightens himself up. "If you hadn't interfered, I 'll probably be a passed-out mess."

"So, thank you."

Ando stared silently to study the junior in front of him; he had unintentionally saved. Curiously, Haruyuki noticed that his hair gave way a bit of magenta under the light but it was barely noticeable unless you knew where to look. Strangely enough, he found the silence to be a bit comforting even when he was sharing his space with the relaxed senior. Both teens stopped studying one another when they turn in direction to an inaudible whimper that filled the room, coming from the still unconscious delinquent.

"Most of the students have already gone on home." uttered the fifth year, turning to leave.

"You should head back too."

Haruyuki just only realized that it was already getting late, judging by how the sun was setting.

"Ah...you're right. I should probably go then," murmured the Junior. By then, he noticed that he was left alone in that narrow space with an unconscious delinquent.

———————————————————————

Haruyuki hissed when he tentatively poked at the sizable bruise on his torso.

After Ando left, Haruyuki had to deal with an unconscious body. Delinquent or not he was not going to leave the guy passed out on the cold hard ground. Haruyuki was not as bad as dubbed Bleach head, so he won't act like one. So with much difficulty and tiring effort, he dragged the unconscious teen to the nurses' office and left him on one of the cots. The school nurse wasn't happy when she had already checked out for the day. Instead, she called for an ambulance, and his guardian since the head injury was still a cause for concern.

When he got home, however, his mother was not pleased. He didn't have the opportunity to look himself in a mirror. And based on how his mother reacted, he could guess that he looked worst for wear.

"I tripped." was his answer to his fussy mother.

Right now, he had himself holed up in the bathroom to inspect his injuries. Patches of black and blue littered on his pale skin. His complexion was a lot paler compared to Ritsu's. Almost fair and supple like a girl's dare he admits. Any distinct markings would stand out on his skin. He wasn't sickly by any means. His headaches weren't that severe. He did get them once or twice a month, but now he had to worry about getting 'episodes'.

A doctor couldn't help him; that's for sure. Who would believe him? There is a high possibility that he would be referred to a psychological ward at best. Worst case scenario, he would be turned away and labeled as a problematic teen playing a prank.

Sighing, he looked at the reflection he shared with his brother in the mirror.

'Research it is then.'

Resuming in treating his wounds, he was then left startled when the door abruptly slammed open, revealing a panting Ritsu.

———————————————————————

Ritsu was already sick with worry when he discovered that Haruyuki was present when he 'confessed'.—rejected when he spotted his brother's unmistakable figure, already far from him before he had a chance to explain.

He didn't know what to do. He was ashamed. He was scared that if his brother knew, he would be treated differently. He didn't want to let him down.

He didn't think he could handle the disappointment.

Dejected, he went home carrying his twin's school bag hoping he could at least attempt to make peace with him. However, when he got back, his concern skyrocketed when his mother informed him that his brother had injured himself.

But he wasn't expecting... this.

Said twin had his eyes widen in worry, teary-eyed at the amount of bruising Haruyuki had on his body.

"N-Nii-san?" he found himself whimpering when he spotted the unmistakable shape of hand imprints that were among the contusions.

Haruyuki was flabbergasted. He hurriedly closed and locked the door, bringing his twin to sit on the toilet, squatting down by the crying boy to give reassurance.

Once Ritsu calmed down, Haruyuki saw that he was still eyeing at the bruises worriedly.

"It's not that bad," he spoke softly, not wanting to spook his twin. His thumbs were circling in a practiced rubbing motion on his hands to soothe him. It was a calming balm for Ritsu every time he needed comfort.

"Promise."

Haruyuki could see that Ritsu was having trouble looking directly at his face. As if ashamed. For a moment, he looked at him questionably but then froze in realization.

The library.

Overwhelmed with guilt, he slowly raises his hands and gently cupped his brother's face. Thumbs were lightly grazing the skin of his cheeks, prompting him to look eye to eye. Then, softly he spoke,

"No matter who you choose to love...Know that I'll always be there to support you."

"Unconditionally."

Ritsu found himself encased in his brother's warmth, squeezing him with every ounce of comfort and love. Slowly but surely, the vulnerable green-eyed teen found himself gripping at him tightly with growing certainty as if he was a lifeline. Haruyuki could feel the wetness gathering on his bare shoulder, his poor brother shaking in relief as if a weight has been lifted.

Closing his eyes, Haruyuki tightens his hold, expressing every bit of his feelings he wishes to convey to his twin.

"You'll always be my brother, Ritsu. I love you..."

"Promise."