1 Chapter 1: The Introduction

So, do you know how the media is always telling you to be yourself by doing things a certain way? Yeah. It's almost like they think they can define or provide the perfect you by having you use whatever product they're advertising. And the answer is NO. The media can't define you, no matter how hard they try. But sometimes it is hard to get somewhere in life if you aren't already portraying yourself in the way someone else expects.

Take me for example. Anna, 30 years old and I finally have a job. What do you mean 30 is too old?? Quiet, you in the back! I'll have you know I'm still a young woman!!!

Anyway. There's all these social rules in place, expectations made for how to do certain things. And I don't think I fit any of them. I'm a t-shirt and jeans kind of gal, I have no sense of fashion, and watches or hair ties are my kind of jewelry. I'm not skinny and even if I had boobs I wouldn't show them off; I wouldn't even want to dress 'sexy'. I have B.O. issues but there's only one perfume I like. I lack confidence, but I don't enjoy being led. I don't gaze at boys or paint my nails, and I prefer 'guy flicks' over 'girl flicks'. I'd rather eat food and watch anime than go on dates, I despise gossip, I hate flirting, and I am a completely straight woman. My version of being professional is to approach my customers with the best friend method and not the businessman model. And I'm not really lucky enough to win stuff.

In short (and I am short), I just don't fit in. So thank you, author (I'm breaking the fourth wall here), for making so many similarities between us. I'm so grateful. That's sarcasm.

Now while my author gets to go out and have a job (😈), you and I get to experience the adventure of what happens when I don't get a job... in chapter 2.

(Seriously, can somebody slap my author's face for me, please? Just once? I'll send you my love.)