29 29. An Idea

Silence.

Complete silence hangs in the air except for the bustle of the market and people hit their shoulders against us as they move by.

Elian takes my shoulders and pushes me over to the sidelines as at that exact moment, Maria breaks into an amused fit of giggles behind me.

"You're quite sprightly today."

"Yes, very." Elian comments observingly, taking me in. I lock my eyes confidently with him and give him a small smile.

"So what do you think about that?"

"I think that's preposterous, Adian. Why would we do that? There's no reason to."

Vincent laughs out at that and it sounds a bit too exaggerated. He wraps his around Elian's shoulders as they're much about the same height and my eyes automatically turn into a pseudo- glare against him. But Elian doesn't seem to notice or mind the skinship as Vincent leans his cheeks onto Elian's shoulders, squishing it tauntingly.

"It's been a while since I came over. Do you mind if I join you all?" Vincent exclaims in sudden excitement but then Elian scoffs in disbelief at his words.

"Don't add to the mess. One carriage, Vince. It's a lot of people and I have to properly discuss with Adian about this...banquet."

"Phoo, look at your lame excuse." He waves his disappointed hand at Elian's face.

"Really, for sure. I'll send you a proper date to have a discussion before the month passes by.

"Oh no, it's okay." I interject, slowly turning my eyes to Vincent, "We'll just invite him to the banquet anyway. You guys can talk there."

"You are not hosting a banquet when there's no plausible reason."

"I say we throw a big ass banquet and we shall throw a big ass banquet. Besides I don't see why you have to have an excuse to meet up with this guy over and over."

"Adian, look. We are right smack in the middle of the market." Maria comes in to placate me, grabbing a hold of my arm but I push it off. I could see the clear tick in Elian's jaw and for sure, he is holding back from making a bad comment about Adian's mistakes as well. But that's not my problem. It's done and I can't change the fact that someone else was already here and made some mistakes.

" Why are you so set on holding a goddamned banquet??" Elian emphasizes with his hand but he is whispering harshly instead of yelling out loud. But then he stops himself as though realizing where we were standing at right now. He deeply sighs, rubbing his palm over his face.

"The carriage is around the corner. Go there, get inside and we'll talk about this properly."

I glance pointedly at Vincent and then shake my head stubbornly,

"You go ahead, lead the head"

Elian glares at me and it seems like it has been ages since he did that but I am sure it has only been a few good days. But he storms off in the direction of the carriage without waiting or looking towards me. I quickly scramble behind him in small steps as opposed to his wide stances.

He doesn't ever speak up as he walks rapidly and I could see a familiar black carriage in the distance.

The door slams with a loud thud as soon as I get up on it and Elian sits down heavily with another sigh.

"Why are you starting a fight at the market? Do you want an audience now?"

"Why won't you fight in front of an audience? I'm not afraid."

"Because–!" He catches himself, controlling his tone, and continues softly, "Because the audience is what makes you survive in this place. You need the favor of the people if you want power."

"Why do you want power?" I scrunch my features in confusion.

I could not understand his logic. But I could try to understand if I could. I know that I'm not from this place so my reasoning will be entirely different. But if I was Adian, I wanted to make this work. I felt like I could make this work. And I am going to make this work.

"Maybe because of the fact that I have never been given power! Over anything! And I want it now." He almost shouts, but he's quite in control but something emotional that is not supposed to be there is coming up in his face. It's strange to see his face covered in emotions and it's... weird. It's beautiful and it makes me want to see it more.

"Elian, you have enough power already. You have a higher status than a marquis now. That's enough, isn't it?" I try to calm him down, shifting in my side of the carriage which is relatively much cramped for him than it is for me and I want to feel him much closer in his meltdown.

"You don't understand." He whispers, shaking his head in the complete conviction that for the fact, I won't understand him and for a strange reason, I feel a need to prove him wrong.

I was not Adian. Despite all the fact that people haven't seen much difference in the Adian before and now. It doesn't change that I am Max.

"Then make me." I challenge him, lifting my chin up slightly.

He scoffs and gently shakes his head at me, looking away. He presses his hand over his forehead in a stressful move.

There is a brief moment of quietness with only the sounds of our breath rising and falling.

"Look, it's not just about having power. It's also about maintaining power." He finally continues, slowly trying his best to explain. I nod along thoughtfully as he spoke.

"Then let's do that thing. The banquet party thing." I softly say to him, but it only makes him huff with impatience.

"Why? Why are you so bloody set on this banquet? Did Vincent say something to you?"

"Apart from a quick story of your past?" I scoff, "No."

He leans over, his elbows resting on his knees, and he thoughtfully peers at him without a word. It takes me a mere moment before I realize that he's playing my own trick back at me, silence to make me ramble on without any awareness.

I give him a small shake, a subtle sign that I won't do it but he shakes his head back at me in the same motion. Then he lifts his chin up to tell me to go on.

"Look. It's not just about the banquet. It's about... doing something I want and being in control. I feel like I've lost all control in my life and I need it back." I explain, not wishing to drag this on any further.

He doesn't reply, still peering up at me with eyes that told me to go on and he'd listen.

"So let's do the banquet, shall we?" I lean over as I spoke the words in hushed tones, rubbing his arm reassuringly before adding,

"Besides, I have something I want to tell you that day."