2 The Real Beginning I

/recap- the last chapter. . . last paragraphs/

All around me, the dark neon colours start to merge and brighten more than a few shades. What's going on? I could feel the temperature rising, the air around me becomes thicker with each passing second and I feel as if I am being squeezed into a tube. Similar to the feeling that apparition gives but the process is slower.

I close my eyes and endure the nauseating feeling rising from my stomach. Why does this always happen to me?

I wait a few seconds that turned into minutes and maybe hours before everything finally let up. Opening my eyes, I scan the area for any threats but am surprised to find a very familiar view. Somewhat. . . nostalgic.

Wait isn't this?

"You, *heave* call my husband. Now!"

"Y-yes milady, right away milady."

I turned to face the scene of my very pregnant mother yelling at the house elf who was apparating away. Most likely to call my father. She looks younger than I remember, but why hasn't she noticed me yet?

Am I in a pensive? I raise my hand and looked at it, paling at the see-through glowing hand that greets me. That's not right. I look back at my. . . younger mother and examine her face.

She looks pale, like she has lost a lot of blood. She's perspiring quite a lot as well. I glanced over at the calendar at a far corner in the room. 5th of June, 1980. It was, or should I say, is the day I was born. The spell was supposed to bring me back to the beginning. If that is so, then it brought me back to my beginning.

But what is the point if I myself am not 'reborn'. Am I damned into a life of hovering a few feet above ground, whispering words of guidance into the ears of the child me? *sigh* I knew anything 'golden trio' related would just bring me into trouble.

I glide over to where my mother now lays down with her eyes shut firmly, and look downwards onto her womb. So that is me in there. As odd as it may seem but I felt a warmth growing in my chest, and was. . . happy. I never really thought about me being this small. I mean, I knew everyone was a child once but you never really integrate it into your awareness of exactly how small you really are. I never really saw any pictures either.

All the pictures I had seen, were of when I had already been educated as a 'proper heir of a most noble and ancient house'. Well. . . I guess most purebloods wont really have much or any pictures taken when they were infants. The cause of that may lie in the belief and tradition that "all purebloods must be able to carry themselves with discipline and etiquette to a certain degree, before they may present themselves before an audience. Inability to act as such would be viewed as blasphemy to the family and their name; he/she will also be marked as an uneducated and uncultured individual unbefitting of the status of a true noble."

That. . . I have to admit, had been repeated to me countless times when I was young that I now and forever will have it memorized word by word.

But something's strange. . . for a while now, I have been feeling my strength leaving me bit by bit. I also feel as though something is off. I check all of the belongings I have with me and find what was there or, what wasn't there. The seal limiter was gone! It was a small charmed chain that I had wrapped around my left wrist to reduce the pain the dark mark gives me.

So that was the 'something off', but that couldn't be why I am feeling weaker by the minute.

Just as I was once again examining my situation for any peculiarities, the doors slamed open, and footsteps hastily made their way into the room. Turning my head to the right, I saw my father with his brows furrowed. His eyes glistened with worry and he casted his grey eyes downwards -for a barely noticeable moment his expression wilted before it flared into rage.

He spun on his heel and swiftly made his way over to the fireplace. Grabbing a fistful of floo powder.

"Cresswell Healing office"

The green fire rose and swallowed my father into this 'Cresswell's' office. However, it did not take long before the fire came to life once more and a slightly pudgy short-stature woman came stumbling in with my father striding behind her.

"Suzzane you indolent fool. You were tasked to stay by my wife's side to assist her immediately while she gives birth to my first son. If anything were to happen to either of them I will hold you responsible for negligence during service."

"O-of course Lord Malfoy. Please forgive me Lord Malfoy."

This, "Suzzane" (who seems to be a healer - with her lime green robes), levitated my mother over to her bed with care and spread out her materials onto a makeshift table. I watched as my father hesitantly left the room and waited. . .

If I'm still here and my mother is giving birth now. Does that mean I will have to spend the rest of my life as an invisible ghost whispering words of advice into my own ears?! Watching myself grow up and. . . if they can't see me does that mean they wont be able to hear me as well!? Bollocks!

This was not what I signed up for! I want a refund!

"Ouch!"

My attention was called back to my mother and the healer, to see the girl holding her hand close to her chest and my mother's stomach glowing red. . . . Did this happen the last time I was born as well? Suzzane quickly applied some gel onto the palm of her hand and seemed to examine the state of my mother or, to be exact, her womb.

I also approached and looked closer at the glowing-... womb, to see the trail of a pale blue glow leading away from her and into ... me. Is my being here causing this? I need to get away fast. I glide away but as soon as I was about 15 feet away, I slamed into some sort of invisible force that seemed to push me closer to my mother.

With every push I make against it, I could feel it scraping at my skin. No, I have to get away! I need to get stronger, I need to get away! My hands that I used to punch at the invisible force gradually turned into mere blurs of light as I shifted into clawing at it.

As i was busily trying to go against the force, the doors flew open once more and I turned back to see the horrified looks of my father and the healer. By Merlin's wrinkly hands, what did I do to deserve this?

I relaxed for one moment and suddenly I felt my entire being sucked into a vacuum.