The first step would be for the mother to approach the situation calmly. She should not overreact but firmly communicate that this behavior is unacceptable.
Professional help is likely needed. A family counselor or psychologist can help the son work through his issues. They can explore his underlying feelings and help him develop healthier ways of expressing himself and seeking attention.
Perhaps there are some underlying emotional traumas. Maybe he has experienced some form of rejection or loss in his life, and this is his maladaptive way of expressing his inner turmoil and seeking some form of comfort or resolution from his mother, although it is an extremely inappropriate way.
Communication is key. The mother and son need to sit down and have an honest conversation about what is going on. The son should be made to understand the seriousness of his actions.
The mom could try to have an honest conversation with the son and explain the consequences of his actions.
Communication is key. The son should be able to talk to his mom about how he feels. Maybe he can tell her that he wants to be more involved in activities like football or building models. At the same time, the mom should listen and respect his choices. For example, she could start by taking him to a sports event and see how happy he is there.
The mother could start by calmly explaining to the son about privacy. Just simply tell him that the lingerie drawer is her private space.
Communication is key. The son and daughter can sit down and have an honest talk with their mom, expressing their feelings and wishes.
The mom should first stay calm. Reacting with shock or anger immediately might make the situation worse. She could simply say something like 'I'm here for you, let's talk' to let her son know she's not there to judge.
The son could ask for some time and space if he feels too overwhelmed in the moment. Then, when he's ready, he can sit down with his parents and have a proper conversation. He can also share some educational resources about homosexuality with his parents to help them understand better.
One way could be for the mom to confront the son's friend directly and tell him that she won't be blackmailed. She could threaten to go to the authorities if he doesn't stop.
He can try to have an open and honest conversation with his mom about how he feels his privacy is being invaded.